This is what the News of the World has your phone doing when you're not looking.
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Wed 30 Jul 2014, 4:04,
archived)
Yeah, something that looks like porn on my office screen, thanks for that
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Wed 30 Jul 2014, 7:53,
archived)
You are, in the most literal definition of the word, a complete finger-sniffing wanker.
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Wed 30 Jul 2014, 8:22,
archived)