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# Call your boss's bluff
(I helped save b3ta! MartinH, Thu 17 Jun 2004, 21:42, archived)
# Woohoo!
What a smashing idea.
(tomsk, Thu 17 Jun 2004, 21:43, archived)
# Heh heh
I've been on the receiving end too many times!
First day at scouts etc..
(I helped save b3ta! MartinH, Thu 17 Jun 2004, 21:44, archived)
# Someone tried
the Long Stand one with me when I started a summer job at Tescos.
I went and had an extra fag break.
(tomsk, Thu 17 Jun 2004, 21:47, archived)
# Summer jobs!
I got a job at Texas homecare with my computer experience to help with the installation of the new barcode system. I turned up and was given a whole pile of barcode stickers and told to stick them on the shelves.
(I helped save b3ta! MartinH, Thu 17 Jun 2004, 21:50, archived)
# Sounds like
the job I had at a football factory. We weren't allowed to sit down or move about. It was grim.
(tomsk, Thu 17 Jun 2004, 22:01, archived)
# eh?
(MooCow_Byter, Thu 17 Jun 2004, 21:43, archived)
# think about them, they're all stupid
any screwdriver is left handed
(I helped save b3ta! GrandmaOfShoes, Thu 17 Jun 2004, 21:44, archived)
# unless its been dipped in a tin of tartan paint first
(I helped save b3ta! mostly harmless John Leslie raped me on, Thu 17 Jun 2004, 21:45, archived)
# pfft!
(I helped save b3ta! GrandmaOfShoes, Thu 17 Jun 2004, 21:46, archived)
# they're all 'games'
played on aprentices on their first day or so - "go get me the left handed screwdriver, lad" - the apprentice knows no better, so it's funny...in a way.
(wobblyjelly, Thu 17 Jun 2004, 21:44, archived)
# I got the water and screwdriver
but a long weight?
(MooCow_Byter, Thu 17 Jun 2004, 21:45, archived)
# if they go and ask someone for a 'long weight'
what are they going to get?
(Lord of the Beans, Thu 17 Jun 2004, 21:46, archived)
# it will be if you're still thinking about the joke
(I helped save b3ta! GrandmaOfShoes, Thu 17 Jun 2004, 21:47, archived)
# Thankyou
that cleared it up for me.
(MooCow_Byter, Thu 17 Jun 2004, 21:48, archived)
# As in
Go and ask at reception for a long weight
(you have to say it out loud)
(I helped save b3ta! MartinH, Thu 17 Jun 2004, 21:47, archived)
# Funny as in "let's stick the new boy in the jcb bucket
20 feet up" way funny.
(I helped save b3ta! magnum, Thu 17 Jun 2004, 21:46, archived)
# Don't forget the elbow grease!
(Gimbo, Thu 17 Jun 2004, 21:43, archived)
# Oh bless you...
(I helped save b3ta! cupboardy, Fri 18 Jun 2004, 10:45, archived)
# Hahaha
Can I have some sparks for the grinder?
(I helped save b3ta! DogHorse plop, Thu 17 Jun 2004, 21:43, archived)
# Woo
and bloody hell it got FP'ed before anyone replied.
(I helped save b3ta! Nimble Colin camera-wrangling, globe-trotting whisky enthusiast, Thu 17 Jun 2004, 21:44, archived)
# electric hammer
woooooooooooooooo
(I helped save b3ta! Punked I Love Vectors, Thu 17 Jun 2004, 21:44, archived)
# hahaha
that's happened the someone from my class in school a few years ago. the teacher sent him away to ask the janitor for a long stand.


we didn't see him for 45 minutes!


woo to the pic!
(I helped save b3ta! Naive Amoeba Bored Cig, Thu 17 Jun 2004, 21:44, archived)
# Hahaha
Brilliant.

I thought I was being really clever when bowling when I declined looking at the "left handed bowling balls" but there was really a rack with them on.
(I helped save b3ta! magnum, Thu 17 Jun 2004, 21:44, archived)
# How rapidly frontpaged
Woo, Yay and a-Hoopla.

(I helped save b3ta! Lazlo Woodbine Panowie!, Thu 17 Jun 2004, 21:47, archived)
# tartan paint!
.
(Lord of the Beans, Thu 17 Jun 2004, 21:47, archived)
# Hah!
I need some blinker fluid and possibly a board stretcher if you're going shopping.
(I helped save b3ta! halus - no, not hello! my arm. it's in a loom!, Thu 17 Jun 2004, 21:48, archived)
# Not forgetting...
The chocolate teapot
The solarpowered torch
The inflatable dartboard
The waterproof teabag
The glass nails
The hooverbags for a Dyson

... to name but a few
(I helped save b3ta! Sabre, Thu 17 Jun 2004, 21:50, archived)
# I've seen a chocolate
teapot in a shops.
(I helped save b3ta! underneath the weeping willow, Thu 17 Jun 2004, 21:56, archived)
# Solarpowered torches
exist also, and work with the cunning addition of a rechargeable battery.
(tomsk, Thu 17 Jun 2004, 22:00, archived)
# I know -
I never got the joke with that. I always thought it was quite a clever idea. But when you say that you get the typical thicko response of "errgh yor so fick incha..."
(I helped save b3ta! cupboardy, Fri 18 Jun 2004, 10:49, archived)
# That is a beauty.
Woo!
(I helped save b3ta! Stickman_ben, Thu 17 Jun 2004, 21:52, archived)
# Inspired
Houpla.
(I helped save b3ta! underneath the weeping willow, Thu 17 Jun 2004, 21:55, archived)
# genie arse
woo
(I helped save b3ta! MrSanity has maybe kicked the WoW habit forever, Thu 17 Jun 2004, 21:58, archived)
# Woo!
A company where I used to work had a recording of a telephone call made by a new starter to the local Do-it-all DIY centre, asking if they sold replacment bubbles for a spirit level.
(Ravenous Bugblatter Beast This content may not be working. Please try again., Thu 17 Jun 2004, 22:37, archived)
# I had teh long weight
done to me on the worksite.
(I helped save b3ta! karatesausage, Fri 18 Jun 2004, 10:11, archived)
# My dad used to ask them to get 'long stand'
When he worked in a huge garage. So they guy would go, "ok, let me go out back and get one". So the por guy has a long stand.
(I helped save b3ta! Cadmus has teh uplikn coeds at, Fri 18 Jun 2004, 12:46, archived)
# WOOYAY!
Someone should actually make these! I would love to see the look on the bosses face when you give him one of these!
(I helped save b3ta! Squiggy Alloria makes theme parks., Fri 18 Jun 2004, 13:32, archived)
# I used to work in a garage
Nippers are brilliant fun,

send them over to the parts dept for
a bottle of compresion (wait ages for Empty coke bottle supplied with rubber gloves)
box of sparks (wait ages for iron filings from the key cutter)
Diesel spark plugs (told to fuck off)
Diesel carb cleaner (see above)
various left handed tools (see above)

and then when they get sent for things that do exist but just sound weird they fuck off for a fag, come back empt handed then get grease smeared on their head for being a twunt.
(5700 is doing the CRX rally - Sponsor Me, Fri 18 Jun 2004, 17:20, archived)
# Bubble
for the spirit level.

Woo to pic!
(I helped save b3ta! Evil|berT is posting post-hummusly, Fri 18 Jun 2004, 18:54, archived)
# Haha
You forgot the phelopian tube (or however you spell it :D)

v.funny piccy tho :D
(davidpike, Fri 18 Jun 2004, 22:13, archived)