Excuse me, but
how the fuck do you know? Were you there?

Had I been any further behind him, I would have been under the wheels of the next car back.

I do not have to justify myself to you. This correspondence is closed.

/edit: apologies for unfluffiness.
( Newington HM Time Corps: Quo vadimus non requirimus vias, Wed 11 Aug 2004, 11:40, archived)

Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!! Handbags.
maybe you should get your breaks checked if you were that far behind and still crashed into him, i'd say that your brakes might be faulty.

or you were eyeing up the big tittied lady on the pavement and wasn't paying attention to the road.
( Thor_sonofodin https://twitter.com/Thor_sonofodin, Wed 11 Aug 2004, 11:51, archived)

... I always eye up the big titted lady on the pavement....
If I crash... I'll be dying happy... :D
( Beastie is doing science with his arse, Wed 11 Aug 2004, 11:53, archived)

I always
tit up the big-ladied eye

*crashes
( Sir Aunty Grampa Dave the Hat - Stuff happens - glee arms - more stuff - glee arms again . . . unexpected horse! - Ta! Cannaoogim!?, Wed 11 Aug 2004, 11:55, archived)

It was a wet day.
All right, if I'd been paying more attention I probably could have avoided hitting him.

But I trust no one is saying it was okay for him to suddenly brake without any warning. As I recall, in fact, he wanted to turn left and hadn't bothered indicating, which is back where we started.
( Newington HM Time Corps: Quo vadimus non requirimus vias, Wed 11 Aug 2004, 11:55, archived)

*says
'it was okay for him to suddenly brake without any warning. As I recall, in fact, he wanted to turn left and hadn't bothered indicating, which is back where we started.'
( Sir Aunty Grampa Dave the Hat - Stuff happens - glee arms - more stuff - glee arms again . . . unexpected horse! - Ta! Cannaoogim!?, Wed 11 Aug 2004, 11:56, archived)

*shakes fist*
Why I oughta...
( Newington HM Time Corps: Quo vadimus non requirimus vias, Wed 11 Aug 2004, 11:57, archived)

*cycles off, cackling madly

*crashes into big lorry

Doh!
( Sir Aunty Grampa Dave the Hat - Stuff happens - glee arms - more stuff - glee arms again . . . unexpected horse! - Ta! Cannaoogim!?, Wed 11 Aug 2004, 11:58, archived)

Don't worry,
it was his fault.
( Newington HM Time Corps: Quo vadimus non requirimus vias, Wed 11 Aug 2004, 12:12, archived)