From the An Accident Waiting to Happen challenge. See all 386 entries (closed)

( Mushroom, Sun 10 Apr 2005, 16:11, archived)

Woo!
Yay!
Subtlety!


(Withiel assumes the position!, Sun 10 Apr 2005, 16:12, archived)

and pagan sex rites
lets have them too
( the wild elk Freeing excellence affects reality, Sun 10 Apr 2005, 16:16, archived)

And free prostitutes for the under 9s

( Paul...Christmas... or some shit, Sun 10 Apr 2005, 16:17, archived)

under 90's I reckon
abolish fines for pissing in the street. How the hell can I get sublimely drunk with such a fine lurking?
( the wild elk Freeing excellence affects reality, Sun 10 Apr 2005, 16:18, archived)

"What time does your blood bank close?"
"Why sir, do you wish to donate?"

"...errr, yeeeees.... donate..."
( Paul...Christmas... or some shit, Sun 10 Apr 2005, 16:16, archived)

yay!
I love politics (and especially those unfunny political evangelists). It makes me laugh til I hurl. Then the laughter stops.


Vote toriberalabour on may teh 6th.
(ah sod it tinsels chummily, Sun 10 Apr 2005, 16:23, archived)

ah go on then since it's my own thread

( Mushroom, Sun 10 Apr 2005, 16:31, archived)

haha!

( eclectech, Sun 10 Apr 2005, 16:35, archived)

Good to see he got the job
as that policeman guy
( Albert the Mildly Deranged purveyors of nothing much since a year or two ago, Sun 10 Apr 2005, 16:13, archived)

Come on you blues
Go Howard!!! Lets kick that grinning w**ker out
(bewitched_fan_2k, Sun 10 Apr 2005, 16:13, archived)

the compo is
things ending in tragedy
( homonk is gay for chairs, Sun 10 Apr 2005, 16:14, archived)

you are Liam Fox
/aicmfp
(Spinkeh, Sun 10 Apr 2005, 16:14, archived)

You're either the least unsubtle Troll ever
or you really don't have a fucking clue do you?
( thirdman Ia! Ia! R'lyeh Cthulhu ftagn! Ia! Ia! Mglui nafl, Sun 10 Apr 2005, 16:15, archived)

but but but... they say they'll make hospitals cleaner...

( lemony, Sun 10 Apr 2005, 16:17, archived)

They would be cleaner as they'd be empty
cos no-one could afford them once they'd been privatised
( thirdman Ia! Ia! R'lyeh Cthulhu ftagn! Ia! Ia! Mglui nafl, Sun 10 Apr 2005, 16:18, archived)

but then i'd get paid more!


/hospital cleaner
( lemony, Sun 10 Apr 2005, 16:19, archived)

No, you would get laid off because they dont need empty hospitals to be cleaned

( Paul...Christmas... or some shit, Sun 10 Apr 2005, 16:20, archived)

except that under the current system (private companies bidding for contraxcts) it's almost impossible to lose a job as a hospital cleaner
there're people who come in to work and spend 6 hours "cleaning" one room... the fact that that room happens to be one with the drinks machine and biscuit box in it is irrelevent
( lemony, Sun 10 Apr 2005, 16:23, archived)

How much does it cost to say to doctors
WASH YOUR BLOODY HANDS you pompous wasters. And also wear rubber gloves.



This is in fact mostly what needs to be done to drastically reduce MRSA, BTW. I know, political, huh?
(ah sod it tinsels chummily, Sun 10 Apr 2005, 16:28, archived)

as someone who's actually told a doctor to wash his bloody hands (before walking in on a leukemia patient in isolation)
i'd say it doesn't cost much... but that for the most part (99% of the time) doctors aren't nearly as bad as their rep, or at least not any more
( lemony, Sun 10 Apr 2005, 16:31, archived)

Gah!
Dont you mean "most subtle"?

I don't know why, but double negatives really confuse me...
( The Neville : enjoying 'Splosion Man too much, Sun 10 Apr 2005, 16:19, archived)

ah
you might like this then. (Safe for Tories, Not Safe For Whining Liberal Scum)
(Withiel assumes the position!, Sun 10 Apr 2005, 16:15, archived)

how is that at all relevant?
*retches*
( eponymous Ham's for eating not hugging!, Sun 10 Apr 2005, 16:19, archived)

I think he was trying to make him watch it :/
*retches also*
( Mushroom, Sun 10 Apr 2005, 16:22, archived)

i've seen the video before but i have to say
it's dramatically improved by the soundtrack... i'm loving it
( lemony, Sun 10 Apr 2005, 16:23, archived)

You have a mind of steel
aicmfp
(Withiel assumes the position!, Sun 10 Apr 2005, 16:27, archived)

well
it is the sort of think I would like Tories to have to look at in return for existing at me. And section 28. And bombing Libya.

Cunts
(Withiel assumes the position!, Sun 10 Apr 2005, 16:25, archived)

shocked at myself for watching all of it!
quite wrong!
( Johno says the chances of anything coming from mars are a million to one But still they come on, Sun 10 Apr 2005, 16:23, archived)

HAHAHAHA
I VOTE THIS FOR THE NEWSLETTER!
best thing ever! not sure whats happening in the last scene tho, thats just wrong
( Cashy, Sun 10 Apr 2005, 16:28, archived)

did you just censor your own fucking bastard swearing?

(Slurpy The Frog, Sun 10 Apr 2005, 16:16, archived)

Yes.
Yes he did.

This is one of the many reasons why Tories are c**ts cunts.
(Withiel assumes the position!, Sun 10 Apr 2005, 16:18, archived)

Oh stop being
such a di***ead Conservative

/has no real political views, just wants a political party who, for once, would actually make a difference to things
( The Neville : enjoying 'Splosion Man too much, Sun 10 Apr 2005, 16:21, archived)

i'll vote for any party who make tea and biscuits a basic public service much like the NHS... i'm more than happy for my tax money to go into tea and biscuits... provided it's nice tea

( lemony, Sun 10 Apr 2005, 16:25, archived)

the nicey party ;)

( Mushroom, Sun 10 Apr 2005, 16:26, archived)

If I start
a Party whose main aim is to get a nice hot cup of tea and a Tunnocks Caramel Wafer onto
every coffee table in Britain, would you vote for me?
( The Neville : enjoying 'Splosion Man too much, Sun 10 Apr 2005, 16:30, archived)

hmmmm... make it a jaffa cake and/or milk chocolate homewheat
and i'll be there
( lemony, Sun 10 Apr 2005, 16:32, archived)

I don't know
about that. If I get into power, I'd start a campaign to have the Jaffa Cake demoted from "Biscuit" status to that of simply "Cake".

These things have to be done...
( The Neville : enjoying 'Splosion Man too much, Sun 10 Apr 2005, 16:33, archived)

Tunnocks are very tasty
but they crumble all over my jumper.
(_Felix suspicious character from prehistoric caucasus, Sun 10 Apr 2005, 16:38, archived)

That's the
best bit. After eating, say 400-500 of the things, your jumper would be covered in so
many crumbs you could actually take it off and eat it.
( The Neville : enjoying 'Splosion Man too much, Sun 10 Apr 2005, 16:44, archived)

Ugh.
*vision of father ted jumper-baked-in-cake scene*
(_Felix suspicious character from prehistoric caucasus, Sun 10 Apr 2005, 16:49, archived)

er
but why not just buy tea and biscuits, instead of filling in forms to have your money taken away to buy tea and biscuits on your behalf? Besides, since some people like ginger snaps and others like bourbons, they'd all end up being digestives.
(_Felix suspicious character from prehistoric caucasus, Sun 10 Apr 2005, 16:31, archived)

best political analogy EVER!
edited for accuracy
( eponymous Ham's for eating not hugging!, Sun 10 Apr 2005, 16:33, archived)

I prefer "analogy".
No, wait, that sounds a bit rude. I meant homology.
(_Felix suspicious character from prehistoric caucasus, Sun 10 Apr 2005, 16:35, archived)

because the shop's over there *points*
i demand home delivery of tea and biscuits... possibly in the form of an air drop
( lemony, Sun 10 Apr 2005, 16:33, archived)

ah yes
but I demand a redistribution of biscuits amongst the most needy!
( Mushroom, Sun 10 Apr 2005, 16:37, archived)

well obviously, this is a social policy after all...
and upon entering the country all asylum seekers will be eligable to recieve on thermos of tea/cocoa and one mcvities assortment box
( lemony, Sun 10 Apr 2005, 16:41, archived)

Woah man....
It's like 1984 all over again!
( The Neville : enjoying 'Splosion Man too much, Sun 10 Apr 2005, 16:34, archived)

if you check back
we clearly stated in our manifesto that all biscuits would be digestives and all tea would be tesco value.
( eponymous Ham's for eating not hugging!, Sun 10 Apr 2005, 16:39, archived)

Yeah
but you didnt say anything about the parasitic mind-control helmets that we'd have to wear every
day to make us think "Trisha" is quality programming and that we like working every day in small, grey cubicles.
( The Neville : enjoying 'Splosion Man too much, Sun 10 Apr 2005, 16:42, archived)

would you like to come with us sir?
if you'd just step into this room...
( eponymous Ham's for eating not hugging!, Sun 10 Apr 2005, 16:47, archived)

Lovely subtle quo

( Sonic 2 and Knuckles, Sun 10 Apr 2005, 16:14, archived)

on his shoulder?
i canny see it
( Johno says the chances of anything coming from mars are a million to one But still they come on, Sun 10 Apr 2005, 16:16, archived)

behind the door

( Paul...Christmas... or some shit, Sun 10 Apr 2005, 16:19, archived)

Gaaaa
Why didn't I think of that?

CURSE YOU GOD FOR MAKING ME THIS WAY


(oh and WOO + YAY)
(Hostile Mike FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU, Sun 10 Apr 2005, 16:18, archived)

excellent
Mr Mush
(burger breath, Sun 10 Apr 2005, 16:18, archived)

Oof.
london calling
( DogHorse if you can read this so can your mum, Sun 10 Apr 2005, 16:18, archived)

kilroy
pfffffffft...
( eponymous Ham's for eating not hugging!, Sun 10 Apr 2005, 16:25, archived)

MORE KILROY!
kilroy
veritas party
:)
( eclectech, Sun 10 Apr 2005, 16:29, archived)

I was wandering
along the street the other day singing "Veritas, Veritas, Stick it up your suntanned ass"
( The Neville : enjoying 'Splosion Man too much, Sun 10 Apr 2005, 16:32, archived)

this makes me very happy
thank you
( eclectech, Sun 10 Apr 2005, 16:34, archived)

ha ha
is it wrong that i guessed that "vienna" was going to rhyme with "burnt sienna"
( eponymous Ham's for eating not hugging!, Sun 10 Apr 2005, 16:37, archived)

hehe

( eclectech, Sun 10 Apr 2005, 16:21, archived)