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[challenge entry] Funny, yet true


My dad actually did say that immigrants caused global warming.

From the The Daily Mail challenge. See all 249 entries (closed)

(rhyswynne puts the "sensual" into "nonconsensual sex", Fri 14 Nov 2008, 8:09, archived)
# Fantastic sig you've got there.
I always liked, "Taking the 'the' out of psychotherapist."
(I helped save b3ta! the_rhyme_minister has a little bit of gold and a pager, Fri 14 Nov 2008, 8:10, archived)
# I put the lol in philology

(I helped save b3ta! Bela Lugosi's Dad clueless egg cunt, Fri 14 Nov 2008, 8:23, archived)
# can't spell "crap" without "rap"
nor "country" without "cunt"
(I helped save b3ta! Agent Muu b3ta.com/board/9745928 <- b3taday festivities!, Fri 14 Nov 2008, 8:26, archived)
# I have been known to...
Put the NING into meaningless

And put the "ivesb" in Digestives Biscuits
(I helped save b3ta! Wobbly Bloke says "oh for Gods sake" on, Fri 14 Nov 2008, 9:31, archived)
# I put the 'intern' in 'internet'
while you're offering
(I helped save b3ta! mediocre *canned laughter*, Fri 14 Nov 2008, 8:27, archived)
# Get me a triple low fat fair trade wet cappucino with hazelnut syrup and two brown sugars along with a copy of the FT and the latest Viz.

(I helped save b3ta! the_rhyme_minister has a little bit of gold and a pager, Fri 14 Nov 2008, 8:29, archived)
# I only have regular coffee

Black, like my men
(I helped save b3ta! mediocre *canned laughter*, Fri 14 Nov 2008, 8:31, archived)
# haha, i was shouting that on election day
"i'll take my coffee like i like my presidents...! tall, black and kenyan!"
(I helped save b3ta! Agent Muu b3ta.com/board/9745928 <- b3taday festivities!, Fri 14 Nov 2008, 8:32, archived)
# Half Kenyan.
It's a blend.
(I helped save b3ta! the_rhyme_minister has a little bit of gold and a pager, Fri 14 Nov 2008, 8:33, archived)
# yeah, too bad biden's name can't be made into a milk pun
or this would be a joke to sustain me for the next four years
(I helped save b3ta! Agent Muu b3ta.com/board/9745928 <- b3taday festivities!, Fri 14 Nov 2008, 8:35, archived)
# Something to do with the name Joe?
I don't know. I've not been to sleep yet. Don't hassle me.
(I helped save b3ta! the_rhyme_minister has a little bit of gold and a pager, Fri 14 Nov 2008, 8:38, archived)
# yeah, i thought of that too
too much grammar finagling to think about at this hour
(I helped save b3ta! Agent Muu b3ta.com/board/9745928 <- b3taday festivities!, Fri 14 Nov 2008, 8:40, archived)
# Don't Americans refer to Coffee as Joe?

(I helped save b3ta! Redsushi! Whoop! Whoop! Ph.D., Fri 14 Nov 2008, 8:57, archived)
# See I have a mate called Coffee*
but his real name is Alan

it would be weird if Americans called him Joe for some reason

* not, as I usually have to point out, for racial reasons...he's whiter than I am
(I helped save b3ta! emvee I wanna do bad things to you, Fri 14 Nov 2008, 9:18, archived)
# RACIST!
How can you be whiter that you? You look like you were born into a vat of Vanish Oxi action ;)
(I helped save b3ta! Redsushi! Whoop! Whoop! Ph.D., Fri 14 Nov 2008, 9:24, archived)
# He just drinks coffee is all

(I helped save b3ta! emvee I wanna do bad things to you, Fri 14 Nov 2008, 9:43, archived)
# Shittest reason for a nickname ever :D

(I helped save b3ta! Redsushi! Whoop! Whoop! Ph.D., Fri 14 Nov 2008, 9:46, archived)
# Hehehe

(I helped save b3ta! mediocre *canned laughter*, Fri 14 Nov 2008, 8:37, archived)
# I like my coffee like my women.
Exported from South America in a box.
(I helped save b3ta! Bela Lugosi's Dad clueless egg cunt, Fri 14 Nov 2008, 8:38, archived)
# *click*

(I helped save b3ta! Joe Scaramanga Reclaiming his face, Fri 14 Nov 2008, 8:39, archived)
# I like my coffee how I like my women
freshly roasted and in a cup
(I helped save b3ta! mediocre *canned laughter*, Fri 14 Nov 2008, 8:47, archived)
# But you got the Viz right?
I can't have my morning dump without it.
(I helped save b3ta! the_rhyme_minister has a little bit of gold and a pager, Fri 14 Nov 2008, 8:33, archived)
# Certainly

(I helped save b3ta! mediocre *canned laughter*, Fri 14 Nov 2008, 8:36, archived)
# You're going to make it big in this business kid.
*goes for poo*
(I helped save b3ta! the_rhyme_minister has a little bit of gold and a pager, Fri 14 Nov 2008, 8:39, archived)
# What you doing on here this morning?
You know it isn't the evening right?
(I helped save b3ta! Redsushi! Whoop! Whoop! Ph.D., Fri 14 Nov 2008, 8:58, archived)
# It is if you haven't slept yet.
I don't know why but I'm wide awake.
(I helped save b3ta! the_rhyme_minister has a little bit of gold and a pager, Fri 14 Nov 2008, 9:05, archived)
# You are a mental fella!
SLEEP IS AWESOME!
(I helped save b3ta! Redsushi! Whoop! Whoop! Ph.D., Fri 14 Nov 2008, 9:14, archived)
# i put the cum in your mum

(I helped save b3ta! yanmania... http://www.newgrounds.com/portal/view/473878, Fri 14 Nov 2008, 9:14, archived)
# Sorry I'm TJing.
Grrr I'm well pissed off. I'm dying for a crap and some little scrote has nicked every fucking toilet seat in the fucking place!
It's going to cost me over 100 quid to replace them all!

EDIT: Oh and posting something that was created using a generator is not considered your own work.

EDIT EDIT: Hot linked and this took about 30 seconds as I, like you, selected the first options rather than actually spending time on it.



EPIC EPIC FAIL!
(I helped save b3ta! riverghost blessed are the gleesmakers, Fri 14 Nov 2008, 8:14, archived)
#

(I helped save b3ta! Just Flange Eiwit, the mighty ENDOSPERM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!, Fri 14 Nov 2008, 8:23, archived)
# *you* stole the seats just so you could make that joke!
*Clouseaus*
(I helped save b3ta! RiffRaff "Board Sig"? What's that?... Oh, I see...., Fri 14 Nov 2008, 8:25, archived)
# Hahaha
EDIT: Fathers for Justice did it! It's in the Mail so it must be true!!!
(I helped save b3ta! riverghost blessed are the gleesmakers, Fri 14 Nov 2008, 8:27, archived)
# The motherfuckers................oh wait......they probly are.

(I helped save b3ta! Just Flange Eiwit, the mighty ENDOSPERM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!, Fri 14 Nov 2008, 9:02, archived)
# Pfft

(I helped save b3ta! mediocre *canned laughter*, Fri 14 Nov 2008, 8:28, archived)
# Brilliant

(I helped save b3ta! the_rhyme_minister has a little bit of gold and a pager, Fri 14 Nov 2008, 8:31, archived)
#

(I helped save b3ta! Bela Lugosi's Dad clueless egg cunt, Fri 14 Nov 2008, 8:34, archived)
# pffft!

(I helped save b3ta! RiffRaff "Board Sig"? What's that?... Oh, I see...., Fri 14 Nov 2008, 8:36, archived)
# Hahaha
:D
(I helped save b3ta! XLVII How's my diving....?, Fri 14 Nov 2008, 8:37, archived)
# *RIMSHOT*

(I helped save b3ta! Elvis of Nazareth This isn't a sig, it's a fucking liberty., Fri 14 Nov 2008, 8:53, archived)
# Heh
It would have to be, eh.
(I helped save b3ta! brainstuff can eat a whole shredded wheat, Fri 14 Nov 2008, 9:03, archived)
# £100 to replace them!!!!
That much will leave you (caught) short.

But what an odd thing to steal?
(I helped save b3ta! The magic of chutney A Dim-Sum-Summation, Fri 14 Nov 2008, 8:23, archived)
# Tell me about it!
I've been through the whole building, they're not on site. I even went out of the way to get funky bogseats.
Sadly they're going to have to be replaced with crappy cheap ones.
(I helped save b3ta! riverghost blessed are the gleesmakers, Fri 14 Nov 2008, 8:28, archived)
# those ones with shag carpeting always made me ill
every once in a while some clod will get a bit of mess on the toilet seat - why on earth would you want to deal with that happening to a piece of carpet you put your bare ass on at least once a day?
(I helped save b3ta! Agent Muu b3ta.com/board/9745928 <- b3taday festivities!, Fri 14 Nov 2008, 8:30, archived)
# I know
It's a double entry into the "Procrastination".

I am rather lazy, I'm sorry.
(rhyswynne puts the "sensual" into "nonconsensual sex", Fri 14 Nov 2008, 8:23, archived)
# Well if you can't be bothered to put the energy into it.
Don't knock shuff off the bottom of the board belonging to people that did! You couldn't even be arsed to host it!
(I helped save b3ta! riverghost blessed are the gleesmakers, Fri 14 Nov 2008, 8:27, archived)
# It is an image challenge, you do know that?

Image challenge
(I helped save b3ta! mediocre *canned laughter*, Fri 14 Nov 2008, 8:28, archived)
# if find the image challenging enough
i'm finding all of these front page add some text about immigrants and nazis challenging.

edit/ shame really because i'm just scrolling straight past them on the board, i'm sure some are even funny.
(I helped save b3ta! god save the queen hardly ever original, Fri 14 Nov 2008, 8:46, archived)
# Ah, the voice of reason ;)
Good morning gstq!
(I helped save b3ta! mediocre *canned laughter*, Fri 14 Nov 2008, 8:48, archived)
# good morning mr mediocre
that's the nicest thing anyone's said about me in ages, you old charmer you.

good morning the rest of you too.
(I helped save b3ta! god save the queen hardly ever original, Fri 14 Nov 2008, 8:50, archived)
# See my sig

(I helped save b3ta! mediocre *canned laughter*, Fri 14 Nov 2008, 8:52, archived)
# arf!

(I helped save b3ta! god save the queen hardly ever original, Fri 14 Nov 2008, 8:53, archived)
# why on earth would anyone want to steal used toilet seats?
...actually, I probably don't want to know...
(I helped save b3ta! RiffRaff "Board Sig"? What's that?... Oh, I see...., Fri 14 Nov 2008, 8:24, archived)
# Guerilla art maybe.

(I helped save b3ta! Bela Lugosi's Dad clueless egg cunt, Fri 14 Nov 2008, 8:25, archived)
# maybe it's a salad-fingers-esque little man who hoards them in his hut
giving special names and running his fingers down each and every one
(I helped save b3ta! Agent Muu b3ta.com/board/9745928 <- b3taday festivities!, Fri 14 Nov 2008, 8:29, archived)
# *shudders*
*fwaps*
(I helped save b3ta! Bela Lugosi's Dad clueless egg cunt, Fri 14 Nov 2008, 8:31, archived)
# wot's the matter? d-do you not like my mouth words?

(I helped save b3ta! Agent Muu b3ta.com/board/9745928 <- b3taday festivities!, Fri 14 Nov 2008, 8:31, archived)
# hahahahahaha!
Arrest Banksy NOW!

Maybe this is the same guy?

www.officer.com/web/online/Top-News-Stories/Thief-Makes-Off-With-2-000-Toilet-Seat/1$28119
(I helped save b3ta! Joe Scaramanga Reclaiming his face, Fri 14 Nov 2008, 8:39, archived)
# go to your worst adversary's house
bring some toilet paper, and do it all over his front porch. leave your wipes there too.

god, i wish i hated someone enough to do that, cos i totally would.
(I helped save b3ta! Agent Muu b3ta.com/board/9745928 <- b3taday festivities!, Fri 14 Nov 2008, 8:25, archived)
# If I did that I'd do it properly.
I'd get one of those hospital commode thingies so I could sit in comfort.
(I helped save b3ta! riverghost blessed are the gleesmakers, Fri 14 Nov 2008, 8:30, archived)
# kind of defeats the purpose of directly defecating onto someone's property
you could just do it from the comfort of your own home and then chuck the contents at their porch
(I helped save b3ta! Agent Muu b3ta.com/board/9745928 <- b3taday festivities!, Fri 14 Nov 2008, 8:31, archived)
# I love the idea of having enough adversaries to be able to grade them from Best to Worst
Surely the best adversary would be the one who's attempting to kill you, while the worst would be the one who just writes 'willy' in the dirt on the back of your car...
(I helped save b3ta! RiffRaff "Board Sig"? What's that?... Oh, I see...., Fri 14 Nov 2008, 8:33, archived)
# hahaha
Or best adversary would be the one you at least get along with when the missus is around
(I helped save b3ta! Agent Muu b3ta.com/board/9745928 <- b3taday festivities!, Fri 14 Nov 2008, 8:37, archived)
# What a fucking cock
what does he need two seats for anyway?
(I helped save b3ta! mediocre *canned laughter*, Fri 14 Nov 2008, 8:29, archived)
# Four:P

(I helped save b3ta! riverghost blessed are the gleesmakers, Fri 14 Nov 2008, 9:08, archived)
# It's a toilet seat nicking chain sweeping the country
Now you have to steal some, if you break the chain you get 10 years bad luck.

I'd do McDonalds first.
'ningles all!
(I helped save b3ta! XLVII How's my diving....?, Fri 14 Nov 2008, 8:34, archived)