Ark at ee!

Ow biss then me babbers?

Following the monumental hangover that was JeffSTOCK – ‘JeffSTOCK II (The alkies boogaloo)’ is scheduled for Saturday the 21st April on the cider boat at the bottom of King Street, Bristol.

This date means Blousie can make it, even if it does mean we’ll have to wait another 7 days before we go blind with alcohol poisoning.

Gut-rot or gout is guaranteed as you force down pints of reasonably priced apples.

Unless people insist, I’m not planning on booking anywhere for food or anything, sort yourselves out.

I’m able to offer language courses for those of you who’ve never headed west before, likewise, Stunned Poster is offering ‘Junior Drinkers’ courses most lunchtimes (you start with a Fosters top and, err, go back to work).

If there is any interest in going elsewhere after the cider boat I’ll link some options.

Time to be confirmed (well, you can get there when you want, I’m debating if I can be arsed watching Bristol City lose before hand)

7pm for The Apple seems favourite - gives folk time to eat.

Might be out of date in terms of the prices, but the drinks menu for the apple is here www.barsinbristol.co.uk/download/L2NvbGxlY3Rpb25zL2J1c2luZXNzZXMvMjIzOC9kb2N1bWVudC83OC9kb2NfMC5wZGY=

Cheers Drive,

Jeff

JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?

I'm in like a ferret down a hole.

girlinthehole

I may come, but I probably won't tbh

Naked Ape call me Caitlyn

And even the offer of a lift!

b3th Not shit. Not mod.

I fancy a western excursion.

Kroney

They have the address and postcode at the bottom of each page AS A FUCKING PICTURE SO IT CAN'T BE COPIED INTO GOOGLE MAPS.

Why do they do that, Jeff? WHY??

The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner

Don't be a cahnt.

Still, I might wander across town and say hello.

crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet

on the inside.

Given it's a saturday the plan is probably sit outside, in which case there's a bare minimum of urine. That said, I'm not sure how scared of you lot I am, I don't dare venture outside of QOTW.

Ungersven would support SpankyHanky's patreon

Mentally ill?

The Grand in Bristol is having a sale and all it's rooms are half price. £50.

When I try and book for April it's £89.

The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner

Hope I haven't messed up.

I got a junior suite for 67.50!!!!

Double for £50 a night.

girlinthehole

cos I get cashback I think. And it was cheap and right by The Apple.

The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner

5 minute walk there, 45 minute walk back.

JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?

Sounds like it'll be fun

Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe

i like cider but i don't like bashing

hmm

broadsword w⚓

I know most of you are from that mythical place that I never venture to, but I am more than happy to have people crash on my floor if anyone needs a place to stay. I'm not TOO weird. Amberl has survived a stay at my house. Just.

Herb Alpert's Taxi Driver I have very beautiful lips

depending on where my family have gone for holidays, I may either be able to offer space, or steal some floor yet again

Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe

Officially the 'Best Ploughmans in the UK!'...

Awarded 'Best Ploughmans in The UK' at The British Cheese Festival in 2009, our scrumptious 'Build your Own' Ploughmans Menu features 25 of the finest local ingredients, the perfect summery accompaniment to a glass of cold cider by the river! Choose from 7 different cheeses, including Quicks Extra Mature Cheddar and Cornish Yarg, the uniquely creamy Cornish cheese that comes wrapped in stinging nettles! Plus delicious Pork Pies, exquisite Duck Pate, thick cut Wiltshire Ham and a plethora of fine pickles, preserves and accompaniments! Build your own or choose from the following...

Cheeseroller's Lunch (5.75) - Smoked Applewood Cheddar, English Blue, Rustic Bread, Biscuits, Farmhouse Pickle, Pickled Onion, Mixed Leaves, Cucumber & Cherry Tomatoes

Fatman's Lunch (6.25) - Smoked Applewood Cheddar, Murray's Pork Pie, Rustic Bread, Biscuits, Beer Mustard, Apple & Cider Brandy Chutney & Mixed Leaves

Frenchman's Lunch (6.25) - French Brie, Duck & Pepper Pate, Rustic Bread, Biscuits, Onion Marmalade, Mixed Leaves, Cucumber & Cherry Tomatoes

Mutineer's Lunch (6.95) - Wiltshire Ham, Creamy Cornish Yarg, Plum Chutney, Beer Mustard, Rustic Bread, Biscuits, Mixed Leaves, Cucumber & Cherry Tomatoes

Spaniard's Lunch (7.50) - Serrano Ham, Chilli Spiced Cheddar, Mixed Olives, Spicy Salsa, Rustic Bread, Mixed Leaves, Cucumber & Cherry Tomatoes

Farmhand's Banquet (9.25) - Smoked Applewood Cheddar, Wiltshire Ham, Murray's Pork Pie, Rustic Bread & Biscuits, Assorted Chutneys, Pickled Onion, Mixed Leaves, Cucumber & Cherry Tomatoes

JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?

we should have a big lunch as they only do sandwiches?

The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner

I've got a feeling, having posted the menu, they might only do food at lunchtime.

So your best bet is to have a large lunch. And to eat before starting on the juice. Basically, start eating now.

JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?

OUR BIGGEST EVER ST GEORGE'S DAY PARTY!


SAT 23rd APRIL 12 noon-12 midnight

It's gonna be a doozy!

As well as the results of the Bristol Cider Awards (have you voted yet?) we will be having...

- The World Apple Bobbing Championships!

- The Blind Cider Tasting Challenge!

- A Hog Roast!

...and a day long mashup of the greatest English music of all time – George Formby & Vera Lynn to Madness & The Prodigy!

JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?

They are still putting the final details together, but it'll be 'something along the same lines' on the 21st of April, which is the Saturday before St Georges day.

So expect shit music, apple bobbing a hog roast and a shit load of people! It'll be epic*.

*Your definition of epic may differ to that of the DogFucker.

JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?

I'm in Bristol on the 28th April, you'll have to change it all now.

Ta

Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa

cheers

Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa

What a disaster.

JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?

What times are you lot getting there and what pre-boat activities have you got planned?

JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?

But I think I've run out of time.

Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics.