One from me and one from my mate.
My mate was walking back home from a night on the piss once, and a girl from down the street (who happened to be Asian, and liked taking the piss out of people) shouted "You're just a fucking twat" at him.

To which he replied: "Yes, I am. But at least I'm not a gangrene-ridden black bitch!" - incredulously racist, so he'll be going straight to hell. Personally I thought it brilliant that he could get that sentence out in his inebriated state without buggering it up.

The other night, I was walking back home from KFC, with bag-o-goodies in hand. Walking past a set of traffic lights on red, a car full of girl racers pulls up alongside and shouts out "Oi! Geek! Got your meal then, have you?".

So I just turned around, and did my best spasmodeacon impression and said "Miss. Obvious 2004!". They drove off in a huff, and through a red light no less.
( GazChap, Thu 29 Apr 2004, 14:33, Reply)