Two I can think of, one at my expense
1. I was writing out a HUGE check to pay for a couch at a furniture store. Now I am a big, ok really big girl and I favour the looser type dress. As I sign my name, the clerk smiles and says, "When are you due?"

I smile back and said, "I'm not pregnant, I'm just FAT!"

She became very interested in the floor.


2. In college, I was cooking for my house one day (a co-operative housing 50 people) so I was very busy. A new guy wandered over and chatted a bit. He stepped up to the shelves, about 6 inches away from the paper napkins (serviettes) right at eye-level. He said, "Where are the napkins?"
I snap, "Right in front of your face, dweeb! What are you, blind?"

He turns and NOW I can see the telltale eye shiver of the legally blind... With haughty dignity he draws himself up and replies, "Yes. Yes, I am."

Fucksocks.
(TDub Nunc id vides, nunc ne vides on, Thu 29 Apr 2004, 14:38, Reply)