Breakin' The Law'I'd taken some mushrooms in a pub,' writes Allen Smithee, 'and things had got a bit odd. People turning into goblins, barstools into toadstools etc. I wandered off from my friends and found myself in a carpark. I noticed a huge liquorice allsort driving towards me and Bertie Basset got out. I kinda realised that Bertie was a policeman and my brain went into paranoid fast forward. I decided that I must be being arrested and said, "I'll just get in the back of your car, Officer" Bertie looked at me with disgust, "Not bleeding likely sunshine. Just piss off home ok?"'
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rob, Wed 7 Jan 2004, 20:34)
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pissing in publicOne night I was especially blasted out partying with friends. I decided I wanted to go to another bar, but my friends didn't want to go. As it wasn't too far I decided to walk by myself.
I got about half way when I realized I had to pee really, really bad. Unfortunately, the spot where I chose to go was quite close to a very busy intersection. When I turned around after concluding my business a friendly officer was sitting there waiting for me.
His first question to me was "You know this is the weekend everyone's in town for the state athletic games. What kind of image do you think you are projecting to our visitors?" I thought for a moment, glanced at my watch and replied, "Well, occifer....it's after midnight, if they're going to be in the games tomorrow they really ought to be in bed by now...." He smiled, and told me to be careful.
(, Thu 8 Jan 2004, 21:55, Reply)
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