My mate the driver again
He saw some bloke with a crash helmet on at the bus stopand thought, "that's a bit odd" as you would. He picked him up anyway and started to drive away.

The helmet guy then pulls out a pathetic excuse for a knife and says "Give us your money". My mate replied with 'fuck off will yer, I'm trying to drive a bus'

'Give us yer money or I'm gonna stick yer' and brandished the knife some more.

Nothwithstanding the large perspex screen between him and the driver, he still hadn't clocked the fact that (being back in the 90s) your money had to be the correct fare and you dumped it into a chute that went into a steel box. The money in that box wasn't going anyway without the access key and that was in a drawer in the cashier's office back at the depot.

Now my mate was getting a bit pissed off at the runt by now and saw his opportunity to get shut of him.

The route he was driving was across a large open plan housing estate which had a lot of large roundabouts. He put his boot down and started going round the roundabout and opened the doors. You'd be surprised at how fast a 12-litre turbo engine can push 12 tone of bus. and they refuse to fall over having such a low centre of gravity.

He managed almost two full circuits around that roundabout before helmet guy lost his grip and flew out the door. He shut the doors and carried along on his route with a round of applause from the passengers.
( sandettie light vessel automatic New Twitter - @bollocksreally, Thu 25 Jun 2009, 13:48, 8 replies)

Fackin'
Ace!
( gareth_alien will be human again at, Thu 25 Jun 2009, 13:53, closed)

You're on a roll today, SLVA
Another click, methinks.
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Thu 25 Jun 2009, 13:58, closed)

That'll be the last I think though
Unless I post about why he gave up the job. But it's not nice
( sandettie light vessel automatic New Twitter - @bollocksreally, Thu 25 Jun 2009, 14:07, closed)

If this is true,
it is fucking brilliant.
( Esme Weatherwax I swear on my tash it's daycent hash, Thu 25 Jun 2009, 14:47, closed)

This wasn't...
... in the particularly roundabout-strewn East Kilbride was it?
(gordonjcp, Thu 25 Jun 2009, 17:11, closed)

*click*
Brilliant...Shame he didn't run the silly fecker over though - it would have been natural selection in action.
(berk, Mon 29 Jun 2009, 14:28, closed)

excellent!
have a clicky.
(RVD420 has his world coming down on, Mon 29 Jun 2009, 15:29, closed)

Beautiful
Have a click. Just wish I'd seen it happen.
(Dog Bum Cute, wiggly, has scary anal glands, Wed 1 Jul 2009, 17:24, closed)