Jimmy Saville once told me to piss off...
When I was a little kid I ran onto the local golf course because I heard that Jimmy Saville was playing a round there, claiming to have lost my dog I ran up to "Dr. Magic" and asked him if he had seen it anywhere. At which point he became quite agitated and told me to "piss off"

Ok not quite being rude to a celeb. but after all these years of psycological trauma, its still got to be worth a mention a recon
(monkey_holding_peach, Thu 15 Apr 2004, 12:58, Reply)

Two instances...
One:
I work for a popular rock music magazine and get to attend it's award ceremony each year. One year, at the awards aftershow, the news went round the magazine staff that "Jon was coming". Not having a clue who they were on about I interrupted the sub-editor (who was chatting to some greasy little spick at the time) to ask who "Jon" was. "Jon Bon Jovi", she replied excitedly, "he's on his way across now". "Bollocks. I fucking hate Jon Bon Jovi", was my response. At this point she introduced the now very angry looking spick as Jon Bon Jovi's press agent. Anyway, it get's worse... Because Jon's arrival was such a coup for the magazine all the staff were summoned to greet him on his arrival. We were lined up at the club entrance like the performers at the Royal variety show waiting to meet the queen. When he finally arrived he walked slowly down the line and shook everyone's hand. After he shook mine I turned to the girl next to me and, pulling a face of upmost disgust and dramatically wiping my hand on my shirt; said "I feel so dirty". She goes bright red and I look up to see the same greasy spick press agent from earlier looking at me like pure thunder. Joy.

Two:
When my little brother was 8 years old he had the spikiest hair you've ever seen and by God was he proud of it. He'd get through hair gel the way most people get through tea. (He wasn't drinking it though, that would just be silly). Anyway, one day during a family outing to Cardiff we hear a commotion behind us and several people shouting "JIMMY!". Several runners ran past us and we realised we'd stumbled onto the route of the Cardiff half marathon. We got a good roadside view and then saw what the commotion was; Jimmy Saville was coming in our direction. He jogged towards us waving at the crowd as he came and as soon as he drew level and saw my brother he ruffled his hair in a 'Hello there you cheeky young scamp! I'm a celebrity and I can get away with this gross invasion of personal space' kinda way. His perfectly spiked hair now a total mess my red-faced little brother bellowed the following memorable phrase at Sir Jim, in full earshot of my parents: "YOU STUPID OLD WANKER! I HOPE YOU FUCKING FALL OVER!"

A race marshall asked us to leave after that.

Much apology for the inordinate length of post.
(R. Jimlad twitter.com/sirmarkymark, Thu 15 Apr 2004, 12:51, Reply)

The twunts off Blue Peter
They came to Belfast for a musical BP special (why Belfast I don't know)and our school was invited to go and see the filming.
There was a break for some reason and me and my mates started waving frantically at them. They were very pleased and waved back..until we gave them all the finger, still smiling...
(Chiligrrl WHERE'S MAH DUBLOONS, Thu 15 Apr 2004, 12:50, Reply)

Not me ...
A freind of mine was a bit of a clubber and a DJ ... he also hated Judge Jules, on two occasions (in England and Ibiza as I remember) when the judge has been walking through crowds shaking peopls hands he has held his hand out as though to shake, and then raised his thumb to his nose and wiggled outstretched fingers (you know what i mean) ...
(FortyFour, Thu 15 Apr 2004, 12:49, Reply)

Mobys Dick
I once took a piss beside Moby after a gig he played in Spain. After informing him that I thought his music gay and pointless he got all cranky and started stomping his wee feet, shouting: "you didn't get the irony, it's meant to be ironic".
Indeed.
(Smell eep!, Thu 15 Apr 2004, 12:41, Reply)

Howard Marks
. . .came to talk at my student union about four years ago, and afterwards joined us in the local "purple turtle" for a bit of a chat and a smoke

we offered to buy him a beer, but he refused and told us to have one and put it on his tab

sensing blood, we told the barman that marksy had offered to buy everyone in the bar a drink, which caused a stampede of booze hungry students and- I'd imagine- much financial hardship for the old hippy

still, for that moment he was the most popular man in the thames valley. . ..
(le renard, Thu 15 Apr 2004, 12:31, Reply)

Well I haven't been rude to a celeb,
but I was told to be quiet by Andy Crane during an event that he was guest judge at. Still, he was a bloody nice bloke though.
(But then again, I could be wrong, Thu 15 Apr 2004, 12:30, Reply)

I once shared a sleeper compartment
with Wolf from gladiators.
He was quite a nice bloke so I wasn't rude to him. But he did get to see me in my pants.
( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Thu 15 Apr 2004, 12:29, Reply)

Another Ulrika Jonsson one...
I once beat the crap out of her in a bar in Paris because she was doing my head in.
(Stan_Collymore, Thu 15 Apr 2004, 12:27, Reply)

Double Whammy!
Homelands festival a few years back. Had VIP tickets and access all areas through my job. After seeing a few acts and munching too many "sweeties" my mate and I went back to the media area and saw Jane Middlemiss leaning back on a plastic garden chair barking into her mobile phone. She looked pretty pissed off so I kicked the back legs of her chair from under her and she went over into the mud. We legged it giggling like a couple of schoolgirls closely followed by two hefty security guards. To make our escape we ran into the rather intimidating and packed Drum and Bass tent only to smack straight into Roni Size who went flying in a shower of spliff-sparks. They didn't catch us and I think I weed myself laughing shortly afterwards.
(doowaz, Thu 15 Apr 2004, 12:22, Reply)

I once told Jools Holland
to f**k off, as he gave my mate a filthy look in Tower Records in Piccadilly Circus, and had an exceptionally ugly ginger child with him.
(Highlander, Thu 15 Apr 2004, 12:20, Reply)

Daphne and Celeste
Joined in with the krusty Slipknot fans at Reading Festival 2000 by pissing in a plastic bottle and throwing it at them.

They left the stage early. In tears.

MWA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA bonk
(Nefarious Tim, Thu 15 Apr 2004, 12:13, Reply)

Not
exactly rude to but rude at. Chelsea train up near Hatton Cross where Hayes play hockey. Game against Hayes one Sat, Chelsea were playing Sunday so they were all finishing training when we got there and the twunt security wouldn't let us in the changing rooms because "chelsea were in there" ... so we changed outside, just as they decided to leave. Long and short, Damien Duff has seen my cock. Adrian Mutu has seen my arse. Cudicini has also had "exposure"

I'm not proud. much ;) .... at least Makalele didn't take the piss because of "cock smallness" ;)
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Thu 15 Apr 2004, 12:08, Reply)

I went to a Fun Lovin' Criminals gig
and someone threw a cup of beer at Huey.

also someone threw a bottle of water on to the stage when Feeder were playing at Reading Festival, and it nearly shorted out the guitarist's effects pedals. hah!
(Mystery Woo Yay Boy, Thu 15 Apr 2004, 12:04, Reply)

On the tube
I barged past the twat that used to play Paddy in Emmerdale and made him drop his case :)
(fudge the return of the man with the cat on his head, Thu 15 Apr 2004, 12:03, Reply)

Fun Lovin' Criminals
About 4 or 5 years ago the Fun Lovin' Criminals played the Aberdeen music hall - I didn't go see the gig but saw them at an aftershow party in a club down the road from the venue. I clocked Huey and started talking to him about Ice Hockey and stuff and offered to buy him a beer. He accepted and I went to the bar to buy two bottles of Becks. Upon my return his HUGE bouncer told me that Huey wasn't allowed to accept the drink as I could have put anything in it. I took offence to this and started on a rant which ended "...well fuck you big man! Huey, you just lost a fan."

I wasn't a huge fan anyway - the satisfaction of telling someone that's six foot cubed "fuck you" was immense - Huey looked a bit embarrased upon my departure.
(fudge the return of the man with the cat on his head, Thu 15 Apr 2004, 12:00, Reply)

I've never been rude to a celebrity
but Norman Wisdom told me to get out of his way at a pro-celebrity golf match when I was 6. Does that count?

I still hate him to this day.
( mother inferior - now fully in compliance with the Trades Descriptions Act, being both a mother and inferior, Thu 15 Apr 2004, 11:52, Reply)

marilyn manson
i went to an open air concert and mazza was doing his bit. not being a big fan of his i started chanting various waterboy phrases, such as "waterboy!", "gatorade" and such.

this didn't do much so me and my mate started chanting "brian, brian" (mazza's real name) after about 5 seconds there was about 100 people chanting brian, brian. the look on his face was feckin great. top moment
(Billy no mates, Thu 15 Apr 2004, 11:52, Reply)

a couple.
louise woodward was in my bar a while ago when i was pissed. she'd had a haircut or something, and when we were trying to figure out if it was her, i pronounced (a bit too loudly), that i wasn't 'having any fucking babykillers in here'. sadly, she'd already got up to leave, and was promptly stood right behind me as i said this. haven't seen her since.

also,
danny the shrek faced monster from hearsay was in my newsagents surrounded by tons of kids back when said group were famous. he was buying an absolute shitload of sweets and taking up the only route to the till. i told him to bugger off in a hushed voice and shoved past him, but i think he was too excited by all the sugar and children to notice me properly.
(andy hunter only responds to a series of clicks and whistles, Thu 15 Apr 2004, 11:42, Reply)

Jimmy Nail & Jeremy Beadle
Jimmy Nail was filming an episode of Spender at Newcastle Central station when I was on my way home from work; I was trolling across the bridge from one platform to another during the filming, saw him and shouted "SHE'S LYING!" at the top of my voice, he didn't look happy

Also a friend of mine, very large punky chap with a mohican once shouted "FUCK OFF LITTLEHAND" at Beadle when he tried to film him walking through the same station
(ShoutyBearHead, Thu 15 Apr 2004, 11:38, Reply)

A1!
Saw them at Music Live 2000 or something like that in Birmingham. It might of been 2001 or something, it was a few years ago. We saw A1 walking towards us (a friend and I, he had gone to get a guitar cheap) and we told them they were shit etc... and then we got thrown out by security. Yay for us!

I've called Robbie Williams a dick, but I was playing footy with him at the time with a few of my friends, weird. I hate him, but he's actually an ok sort of chap in real life.

I slapped Mani (Primal Scream, ex Stone Roses) on the top of the head the other week and said 'ello to him. Yay!

Upon seeing Jenson Button looking very annoyed at a parking ticket he got outside his flat in Monte Carlo (Rightly so, he hadn't payed) I said hello, then called him a rich bastard so he could easily afford the fine. He took it in good spirits. Nice chap.
(Vega31, Thu 15 Apr 2004, 11:29, Reply)

My mates
Marky and Sid saw Paul Zennon in the Office in Brighton. They asked him to do a magic trick.
He told them to fuck off!!

Twunt!
( D3xt3r Don't take any guff from these fucking swine...., Thu 15 Apr 2004, 11:28, Reply)

I once shouted 'JAMIE OLIVER IS A TITWANK'
at him. But it was rather crowded at the time, so he probably wouldnt have known it was me.

Ah well. At least I can die happy now.
(Attention Whore, Thu 15 Apr 2004, 11:25, Reply)

Nothing terribly special.....
....but I was in the Coach & Horses in Romilly Street a couple of years back and feeling a bit pissed up and attitudinous. A diminutive little redhead was politely trying get by me and I refused to simply move aside. Imagine my surprise when it turned out to be the tasty Daisy Donovan. Boy, did I feel like a cock.

Oh, and I threatened to push Paul Daniels into small lake that was being drained in my local park. I threatened him from some distance however, so I'm not sure he heard me. I was only 10.

Oh, and i was a little bit rude to Rusty Lee on the phone once. I was working in a bailiff's office and we cleared out the Gladiator Shadow's house and he was a debting pikey gyppo. She wanted us to give him his stuff back as she was his mate apparantly. I told her to tell him to pay all his fines or tough luck and that it wasn't any of her business anyway.
( DancesWithWeezils, Thu 15 Apr 2004, 11:22, Reply)

Just 1 year ago...
I was playing drums at a concert, an open air one. The guy off university challenge, the presenter, was standing right next to me. My dad seized the oppertunity, and took a photo. The university challenge guy thought we were the press or something, and left!



ego!
(ChimneySweep IS TWO PEOPLES!, Thu 15 Apr 2004, 11:21, Reply)

Oh, and Debbie Harry kicked a bottle at me...
At the Falls Festival (a new years eve concert near melbourne) in 1998, after a day of heavy drinking, I was in the front row waiting for blondie to come out and play for us. Having waited for about 15 minutes with no band on stage, I decided to greet them with both my hands in the air, finger extended, yelling 'Fuck you Blondie' at the top of my lungs (as you do). She actually noticed me doing this in the crowd and kicked a plastic bottle at me before starting the countdown to new years. They cancelled the rest of their tour in Aus for health reasons - I like to think it was because of a shattered ego.
( gronkpan https://twitter.com/VomitingLarry, Thu 15 Apr 2004, 11:17, Reply)

Once In London
At a club called chinawhites. I was steaming drunk and saw Dane 'another level' Bowers and proceeded to rip the piss out of him. One of his ladies came over and said Dane Bowers is 'rude' whatever that means. Then i told half the club after seeing that Jordan and Dane video that he had a small cock and was a right twat. He wasnt impressed. Especially when i started doing his dance moves in a stupid drunkenly way.

Oh I also managed to piss off Zenden who plays for Chelsea by asking him for a photo for a mate who supports that team and then had a massive pillow fight with a blonde with very large boobs. all in one night.
(JonnyWad, Thu 15 Apr 2004, 11:12, Reply)

I have no recollection of the precise wording
due to being very drunk indeed. However, it involved slagging off the blonde one from Birds of a Feather as being a talentless bitch while simultaneously trying to chat up her jailbait daughter.

Later that evening I referred to Patick Stewart as a "stuck-up, shiny-headed bastard" just loud enough for him to hear while staggering away having failed to get an autograph following our fascinating conversation about the relative merits of Excalibur and the five-hour cut of Dune (which he professed never to have seen, despite having done the voiceover at the start, the cunt).
( TV's Nosemonkey, Thu 15 Apr 2004, 11:11, Reply)

Once called
Dexter Fletcher a short arse little cunt. But then again who wouldn't?
(cymrococh, Thu 15 Apr 2004, 11:02, Reply)

Then there was Justin from Elastica
me and my mates were walking down the road slagging off Elastica (who were playing nearby that night) we passed a young lady leaning against a wall and smoking

a few steps later someone goes "isn't that the woman from Elastica?" "No," someone replies "her hair isn't that colour"

next night she's on Later with Jool Holland

She'd dyed her hair
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Thu 15 Apr 2004, 11:00, Reply)