Romania
While travelling in Romania, I arrived in a town that wasn't listed in my guidebook and set about trying to find somewhere to stay. Nobody spoke a word of English and I had to mime sleeping to dozens of people before I was shown towards a large building that looked like a school or hospital.

The receptionist seemed to suggest that there was indeed a room and enthusiastically took my cash in advance before ushering me to a windowless cell, where my attention was drawn immediately to the corpse. It was lying in a coffin on a trestle in the middle of the room - an old woman with mortician's make-up and that old-womany smell of lavender talc (and formaldehyde). Naturally, I said that the room was not acceptable, but I was made to understand that there was no other - and it was quite cheap. What the hell, I thought -it's an experience.

So, trying to ignore the stiff, I unpacked my bag on the bed and started to think about a cup of tea. There was a phone, so I called reception and used the Romanian word for 'tea'. Thirty minutes later there was still no tea, so I walked out of the room and met the room service lady approaching me down the hall. She was clacking steadily along with a zimmer frame and had spilled all but a drop of my tea down the frame and along the corridor. I thanked her anyway, but she seemed to be suffering from advanced dementia and just chortled to herself insanely. Weird.

I'll say one thing, though. It was quiet. I had a great night's sleep, even with a dead woman in the room with me. In fact, I wrote down the name of the hotel to give to other travellers - only to discover a couple of weeks later that the "Stary Resydence" I'd stayed in was actually an old people's home.
(frankspencer, Mon 21 Jan 2008, 10:22, Reply)