Desperate TimesStranded in a hotel in an African war zone with no internet access for two weeks, I was forced to resort to desperate measures. Possessing only my passport and the clothes I stood up in; and the warning "You can catch it shaking hands with a vicar out there" ringing in my ears, I had to draw my own porn in order to preserve my sanity.
Alas, it all came out looking like Coronation Street's Audrey Roberts, but, as they say, any port in a storm.
What have you done in times of great desperation?
(
Scaryduck - twitter.com/duckorange, Thu 15 Nov 2007, 10:10)
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NnnnghTo date (non-chronological):
1. Knocking one out over the swimwear / lingerie section of the Freemans catalogue.
2. Dropping something the size of a Rhino turd in some sub-saharan filling station after SIX HOURS of mind-bending bowel cramps and a titanic struggle to stop from shitting while driving. I had to use the newspaper left on the sink to wipe my hole. No idea why I didn't just shit in the bush.
3. Utilising a loaf of bread as a makeshift wank-toy. Go figure.
(, Mon 19 Nov 2007, 20:10, closed)
I can imagine bread can be quite abraisive after a while.(, Mon 19 Nov 2007, 21:39, closed)
Please tell me it wasn't multigrainbecause that would have chafed.
(, Mon 19 Nov 2007, 22:53, closed)
Actually it's not too shabbyJust utilise some warm water. Splits easily though.
(, Tue 20 Nov 2007, 20:32, closed)
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