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This is a question Down on the Farm

Have you ever been chased from a field by a shotgun-wielding maniac? Ever removed city arseholes from your field whilst innocently carrying a shotgun? Tell us your farm stories.

(, Thu 24 May 2012, 13:19)
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A friend of a friend....
No really, although I did meet him and heard this story from him. I seem to remember his name was Sean.

Anyway, this guy was dating a girl who lived on a farm in the country somewhere.

He'd been seeing her quite for a while and all was going well but he wasn't getting any, until one day they went horse-riding together. The young lady seemed to be getting more and more excited as they rode until, eventually she dragged him from his saddle and practically raped him.

It turned out that she was turned on by horses, so much so that even the smell would get her in the mood.

Fast forward a few weeks and they are in her bed together, but she just cannot seem to get in the mood. This is when Sean has a genius idea.

He runs downstairs, clad only in his boxers to the field by the farmhouse where her horse is tethered and starts rubbing himself against the horse. His plan being to acquire the smell of horse and thus turn on his lady friend.

Apparently the police who happened to drive by at that moment and catch him, near-naked, rubbing himself up against a horse, were quite understanding, if not a little amused, once his shame-faced girlfriend vouched for him.
(, Thu 24 May 2012, 16:59, 6 replies)
There's nothing wrong with a bit of equine frottage
...so I understand.
(, Thu 24 May 2012, 17:07, closed)
I have never tried it and I never will
I am massively allergic to the long-faced bastards. At least I was 10 and I've had no reason to find out if things have changed since.
(, Thu 24 May 2012, 17:13, closed)
Horses...
dangerous at both ends and crafty in the middle.
(, Thu 24 May 2012, 17:43, closed)
:-D

(, Fri 25 May 2012, 11:03, closed)
Winner.

(, Thu 24 May 2012, 18:00, closed)
Watch out for someone mentioning deagostini in response to this post.

(, Thu 24 May 2012, 18:01, closed)

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