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This is a question Eccentrics

We all know someone who's a little bit strange - Mum's UFO abduction secret, or the mad Uncle who isn't allowed within 400 yards of Noel Edmonds.

Tell us about your family eccentrics, or just those you've met but don't think you're related to.

(Suggested by sugar_tits)

(, Thu 30 Oct 2008, 19:08)
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Bhougremious Fpoon
Good Afternoon

My Name Is BHOUGREMIOUS FPOON.

I have the following issues with my new Arxinon 7380 Pentium VI Drive.

Firstly, the screen thren hassen can meddle notwith black squiggles.

Secondly, the inward-outward flange. It is not receiving, nor is it sending. It is also not sending, or receiving, when in TELE mode.

Thirdly, the COILON lead. Is it suppossed to dock with the male, or the female, SCARTING socket? If male, which end - north or south - goes in the modem? If female, how do you get the cover off?

Fourthly, mice. My Arxinon 7380 Pentium VI came supplied with 8 mice. How many should a man of my standing require?

Fifthly, she star mesoptron voltimater concordance. Nested quantuples - but incompatible vox boost. Deploy, scatter, uninstall, or all four?

Sixthly, the hash prompt reads thus:

HEXANAL: 14641
TWIN PEDAL: Active
GHOUL: Ugh
RETRONICS: Silver
OFF-NODE: On
ON-NODE: Off
OT-NOTE: Om
CUNNATE: Fined
PHONG: Rouge
OUTPOT: 86789798735189754

Are these readings as it should be?

Seventhly, and most annoyingly, the CAC-card ejects every time I press "PURGE". Surely it should initiate PURGE process? Most annoying as I have to go into DOS and run PURGE myself.

Eightly, the flungward node (the one attached to the external dome) has cracked - do I need to puchase a replacement, or can I simply glue the casing back together?

Ninthly, the vidplayer. I have downloaded some pornography by accident, and the vidplayer refuses to work, even though I have deleted the pornography (I thought it was a nature documentary on the inhabitants of South Bristol), and sent an apology via e-mail to the manufacturers of both the Arxinon 7380 Pentium IV and the vidplayer. Could you advise what I need to do next, or should I simply hand myself over to the Police?

Tenthly, radiation. Is the Arxinon 7380 Pentium IV adversely affected by the presence of a large source of Gamma radiation? I need advice before installing expensive and heavy lead sheeting.

Yours Sincerely

BHOUGREMIOUS FPOON.
Koln
Deutschland
(, Wed 5 Nov 2008, 17:32, 5 replies)
Superb!
That made no sense, so I click thee, Herr Fpoon.
(, Wed 5 Nov 2008, 17:38, closed)
I just gobbed on my screen..
..that's genius.
(, Wed 5 Nov 2008, 17:40, closed)
tehe
flange :)

Pornography by accident :)


This is my favourite!
(, Wed 5 Nov 2008, 18:01, closed)
Glau to bo of afristance
Firstly, the black squiggles are thrumpts - dont worry about them. They go away when the screen thren harfen.

Secondly, the inward-outward flange. It only sends/receives in foto.

Thirdly, the COILON lead. Plug the south male into the north female and duck.

Fourthly, mice: 12 is enough. Get 14 if you are really groof.

Fifthly - scatter. Then hide under the vidplayer.

Sixthly, the hash prompt is frood.

Seventhly, the CAC-card ejects every time I press "PURGE" - Simply tighten the flunge bracket.

Eightly, the flungward node - Gaffer tape.

Ninthly, the vidplayer. Can you send me the pron? I'll check it for rumbles.

The Arxinon 7380 Pentium IV loves gamma rays - just try to avoid tetron.
(, Wed 5 Nov 2008, 18:19, closed)
inspired insanity
click
(, Thu 6 Nov 2008, 9:10, closed)

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