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Pavlov's Frog writes: I once spent 20 minutes with my eyes closed to see what it was like being blind. I smashed my knee on the kitchen cupboard, and decided I'd be better off deaf as you can still watch television.

(, Thu 24 Jul 2008, 12:00)
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2001 Sleep Deprivation Study
For the whole year of 2001, I conducted a study on sleep deprivation. Like I've said on many a QoTW, I've never had many friends. I wanted to see how lack of sleep effects the brain so I avoided it at all costs. I would stay up for days at a stretch and succumb to the eventual sleep, waking up and trying it again, this time for longer. My mind at that time swirled with enlightened thoughts and I was sure I was the Buddha incarnate. I had found the meaning of life. But when the sleep study ended and I went back to my normal and somewhat sane self, all I found as proof of my enlightnment was pages and pages of this (these are actual excerpts from my sleep deprivation journal):

Time moves slow and so do I -- everything seems to be happening behind a waterfall of maple syrup. The air seems palable.

If that which doesn't kill us makes us stronger, old people wouldn't be so frail.

The clock just struck 4:25, as it does everyday at about this time.

The world has closed its eyes to me and everything else, and your thoughts detatch and become real, somehow, moving breathing lifeforms that you no longer have to feed.
Day is breaking. Smash.


At the pizza place we went to, there was an entire, possibly epic game of chess going on on the ceiling, and everyone around me was too busy to notice.

The Spanish channel is yammering on and on inside my head. I wish I could understand it; maybe they are saying something important. Instead he just talks and talks, in a language that I don't understand, words seem to overlap as the tempo of the talking gets faster. Is this even Spanish, or something that just sounds like it?

Hammers and nails, hammers and nails, it's what we use to kill garden snails.

Pippo was a normal boy with extraordinary powers. He seemed to see things that the other people around him didn't even bother to take notice of. For instance, as long as Pippo could remember, there was always a giant comet hurtling towards Earth. One day he looked up and cried, "Holy fuck, a giant coment!" Since then he's always been praised for his above average perceptual skills.

If I were to pour a cup of coffee for the sole purpose of dumping it on someone, than I probably wouldn't put sugar in it first.

Right now I have the word "irrelevancy" stuck on repeat in my head. I don't know why. But it seems strangly...irrelevant.

Just now I was walking under some trees, and acorns kept falling on me. I think the squirrels are trying to kill me, but I can't prove it.

Today I figured out that if you take any monosyllabic word and double it, you'll have either the name of a monkey or a panda bear.

Today I was talking to Erika about having a purple toilet in your kitchen. I postulated that a good way to con someone would be to simply invite them into your house. They would see the toilet, and go, "My God! A purple toilet!" and then, "Hey! There's a toilet in the kitchen!". Finally, they would put it together and exclaim, "Holy fuck! There's a purple toilet in the kitchen!" While they are standing there all confused, you could take their wallet. I even wrote a song about it.


A guy with two glass eyes only looks like he can see.




As you can see, sleep deprivation gives you illusions of profound enlightenment while really only providing you with a vast and playful insanity. Sort of like college...
(, Thu 24 Jul 2008, 23:54, closed)
Yeah.
Exactly what I'm like when high - I think everything I say is utterly profound, I write aphorisms and pretend to converse with Nietzsche on how we share an abhorrance for the widespread misunderstanding of his many philosophies. From Hitler to Hipsters, some people just cannot read.
(, Fri 25 Jul 2008, 0:07, closed)
suddenly
fight club dialogue becomes real and makes sense.
I am going to try this one day.
*click*
(, Fri 25 Jul 2008, 6:19, closed)
The monkey/panda one is actually very perceptive
I'd never thought about it until now. I just want some Chinese zoo to come up with really ridiculous names. "We are pleased to announce the successful mating of Bungbung and Wankwank"
(, Fri 25 Jul 2008, 11:04, closed)
Hammers and nails, hammers and nails,
it's what we use to kill garden snails.
(, Fri 25 Jul 2008, 12:57, closed)
YOU
are Thom Yorke and I claim my five pounds.
(, Fri 25 Jul 2008, 13:02, closed)
^ Thom Yorke? Really?
*Blushes*
(, Fri 25 Jul 2008, 22:24, closed)
Inadvertantly
I read that in Edward Norton's narration voice.
(, Tue 29 Jul 2008, 12:27, closed)
I'm sober and not sleep-deprived
but I can see the inherent zen wisdom written in a poetic and amusing way.

Have a big click from me!
(, Thu 31 Jul 2008, 12:40, closed)

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