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This is a question Guilty Secrets

We were shocked - nay, disgusted - to read on an internet discussion forum of a chap's confession that his darkest, guiltiest secret was that he recently cracked one out over press photos of tragic MILF Kate McCann. He reasoned that "she's a good Catholic girl and looks dirty, so she'd probably go bareback".

What guilty secrets can you no longer keep to yourself?

(, Fri 31 Aug 2007, 12:22)
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of red high heels and polish men...
ok two guilty secrets that just added up to one horribly humiliating moment about 5 seconds ago.

first and understandable to women: i have a bit of a thing for very beautiful and uncomfortable shoes that i will probably never wear. so this morning i spent 250quid on the sexiest but classiest pair of red high heels you've ever seen. they should be illegal.

secondly, my flatmate and i both have a bit of a thing for the hot 22 year old polish blond delivery guy from waitrose. to the extent that we will happily order tons of groceries online instead of walking 2 mins to tesco, just in the sad hope that he is delivering.

i know, i know, but you should SEE this guy. then judge me.

so i'm marauding elegantly round the flat in a red towel and huge velcro rollers when flatmate rings and says she's left her keys, will i let her in as she's on the doorstep. fine. i walk past the full length mirror in the hall to do so, and can't resist slipping the shoes on as well. oh yes, they even look good with a towel. even if they hurt like fuck.

then i open the flat door. "get a load of these babies!" i cry. only to see that flatmate is not alone. no, she's standing right next to polishboy and this week's boxes of pointless shopping.

i've never looked/felt like such a prize twat. this was not a slinky seductive small towel and tanned legs job. this was a massive hair dye stained bath sheet, skinny pale legs sticking out of the bottom, jumbo blue rollers and a vivid green face mask...

fucking shoes, fucking waitrose, fucking fucking hell!!!
(, Sat 1 Sep 2007, 17:05, closed)

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