Old Man Down!
Years back, I was making may way through the dark, dangerous backstreets of Wakefield to the sanctuary of my car when I noticed an old guy lying in the road. He was barely conscious, barely coherent and unable to stand up but somehow I managed to move him to the pavement.

I didn't have a mobile at the time so ran the mile or so to my car, drove back at speed, and with great difficulty sat him in the passenger seat ready to take the guy home (he was refusing hospital).

We got to his house and I helped him out the car. He looked directly at me as though he was going to say something profound - then burped in my face! The vile aroma of too many double whiskies, beers, pork scratchings and pickled eggs hit my nostrils and I suddenly realised he old cunt was fucking drunk.

I almost kicked the old bastard through his front door, told him to take it fucking easy next time and drove away. Halfway home, I noticed something dark on the grey seat fabric so reached over and put my hand in a cold, wet puddle.

He'd fucking pissed himself.
(tinpixel, Fri 10 May 2013, 9:05, 1 reply)

ALL drunks piss themselves, why were you surprised?
Full marks for getting him home though.
(Juan Quar is clinging to her front teeth on, Fri 10 May 2013, 11:49, closed)