So, apart from the "fight" between Reverend Fister and Quentin
what has been the most tragic thing you've ever seen?
(Bazongaloid, Tue 27 Mar 2012, 16:36, 79 replies, latest was 12 years ago)

My penis

( Peej, Tue 27 Mar 2012, 16:39, Reply)

His penis

(PsychoChomp, Tue 27 Mar 2012, 16:40, Reply)

When will your girlfriend be back to full operational capacity?

(Bazongaloid, Tue 27 Mar 2012, 16:45, Reply)

Puncture repair kits are very effective these days.

( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Tue 27 Mar 2012, 16:46, Reply)

She's of the codiene today
and she's coming down thursday, so I expect her to be mopping floors and cooking me dinner within an hour of arriving.
(PsychoChomp, Tue 27 Mar 2012, 16:48, Reply)

Does she live near you?

(Bazongaloid, Tue 27 Mar 2012, 16:49, Reply)

Nah, about an hour and a half away.

(PsychoChomp, Tue 27 Mar 2012, 16:50, Reply)

Do you see this as a potentially long term thing?

(Bazongaloid, Tue 27 Mar 2012, 16:53, Reply)

I am a flexible and motivated individual
great team player and hungry for the opportunity to join this exciting buisness.
(PsychoChomp, Tue 27 Mar 2012, 16:57, Reply)

If she's a pole dancer then she needs to be flexible and motivated too.

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Tue 27 Mar 2012, 17:07, Reply)

And empowered.
And naive.
(Bazongaloid, Tue 27 Mar 2012, 17:08, Reply)

all our penis

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Tue 27 Mar 2012, 16:43, Reply)

are belong to us?
Let's party like it's 2001!
( scarpe We Stole Bikes, Tue 27 Mar 2012, 17:22, Reply)

Jim Bowens penis

( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Tue 27 Mar 2012, 16:44, Reply)

Did it hit the bullseye?

(Bazongaloid, Tue 27 Mar 2012, 16:45, Reply)

From what I can remember of that wild and crazy night when he stood next to me at the pisser he managed to avoid the perils of pissing down his trouser leg

( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Tue 27 Mar 2012, 16:47, Reply)

Did he piss down yours instead?
This is a feat my ex wife's uncle managed to achieve with me at an 18th birthday party. Well, it was more my foot but it did create a certain level of splashback.
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Tue 27 Mar 2012, 16:53, Reply)

"Come and have a look at what you could have won".

( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Tue 27 Mar 2012, 16:45, Reply)

I'd have gone for the speedboat EVERY TIME

( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Tue 27 Mar 2012, 16:48, Reply)

Especially in that well known coastal area the Midlands.

( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Tue 27 Mar 2012, 16:53, Reply)

Er...is it your mum?

(Reverend Fister "a disciplined fuckwit", Tue 27 Mar 2012, 16:55, Reply)

The CCTV of the little girl dancing just before she was shot is pretty harrowing, I think.

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 27 Mar 2012, 16:55, Reply)

Piston trying to chat up a girl at the Edinbash was pretty much up there.

( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Tue 27 Mar 2012, 16:56, Reply)

your mum

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Tue 27 Mar 2012, 17:00, Reply)

Oh Quentin, really?
I thought you and me had a connection. Why would you say something like that?
(Bazongaloid, Tue 27 Mar 2012, 17:06, Reply)

because i think its tragic just how underratedly wonderful your mother is

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Tue 27 Mar 2012, 17:09, Reply)

The amount of sunburned people in the park earlier.

(Barry from Eastenders is, despite the words written above, not a woman, Tue 27 Mar 2012, 17:03, Reply)

how cant hey even get sunburned in this country? surely the sun is weaker here?
you shoudl declare ALL OUT WAR on them
(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Tue 27 Mar 2012, 17:03, Reply)

Has anyone ever survived to talk about what happens when you declare ALL OUT WAR on somebody?

(Bazongaloid, Tue 27 Mar 2012, 17:05, Reply)

i dunno man, ALL OUT WAR is barry's thing
i'm easygoing
(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Tue 27 Mar 2012, 17:09, Reply)

Because they're weak minded and/or northern.
Only the weak minded and northerners get sunburned. Also gingers but I'll leave them alone cos they have enough to deal with as it is.
(Barry from Eastenders is, despite the words written above, not a woman, Tue 27 Mar 2012, 17:11, Reply)

thats good of you, ALL OUT WAR for the rest of them though?

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Tue 27 Mar 2012, 17:15, Reply)

cockgazzes

( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 27 Mar 2012, 17:11, Reply)

That's actually happened?

(Barry from Eastenders is, despite the words written above, not a woman, Tue 27 Mar 2012, 17:13, Reply)

Yep. I got a gaz from Monty once, and he's a cock.

( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Tue 27 Mar 2012, 17:15, Reply)

Charming

( Reginald Donkeyfuck, Tue 27 Mar 2012, 17:18, Reply)

It was the other Monty.

( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Tue 27 Mar 2012, 17:19, Reply)

the not as good one?
typical
(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Tue 27 Mar 2012, 17:19, Reply)

sadly, yes

( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 27 Mar 2012, 17:24, Reply)

I think I just got admin rights for IGN =S
uk.ign.com/wikis/mario-kart-7/Airship_Fortress
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Tue 27 Mar 2012, 17:21, Reply)

It's a wiki isn't it?
I've got the ability to edit.
(PsychoChomp, Tue 27 Mar 2012, 17:22, Reply)

Still shouldn't be able to do it without logging in though

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Tue 27 Mar 2012, 17:23, Reply)

The most tragic thing I have ever seen was in Naples where I saw a one legged homeless drunk pissing down his trouser leg. It was the one that still had an actual leg in it.
( scarpe We Stole Bikes, Tue 27 Mar 2012, 17:24, Reply)

Alright scarpe? Are you in Northumberland now?

( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Tue 27 Mar 2012, 17:26, Reply)

Nope, will be in Noocassel on Friday and the back of beyond, Northumbria from Saturday for a week.
Can't bloody wait. London is annoying me at the moment. I had another row on the train this morning. I think it's me after all.
( scarpe We Stole Bikes, Tue 27 Mar 2012, 17:27, Reply)

I hope this weather holds for you, then.
It's absolutely fucking glorious at the moment.
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Tue 27 Mar 2012, 17:29, Reply)

I know. I'm not letting myself expect it to last
I was planning for rain, so if I keep doing that, sun will just be an added bonus.
( scarpe We Stole Bikes, Tue 27 Mar 2012, 17:30, Reply)

Got any sightseeing earmarked yet?

( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Tue 27 Mar 2012, 17:33, Reply)

Lots of walking.

I've printed off a dozen different walks to do this afternoon.

Apart from that Barter Books is on the list, as are a couple of castles that the missus knows the names of but I keep forgetting. In truth, I've forgotten where we are staying again - I think you had to tell me last time anyway. In a cottage on a farm outside...Walkworth? Somethng like that. Somewhere on the coast with a Castle...

Mainly I intend to not have to deal with people, so anywhere that they aren't, really.
( scarpe We Stole Bikes, Tue 27 Mar 2012, 17:38, Reply)

Any 'Do Not Miss' things I should know about?
I can even cope with ones that do have people around as long as I only have to deal with that once or twice.
( scarpe We Stole Bikes, Tue 27 Mar 2012, 17:39, Reply)

Oh yeah, Moaty's storm drain is in Rothbury.

( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Tue 27 Mar 2012, 17:49, Reply)

Yep, Warkworth is the village with the castle.
I suspect Bamburgh castle might be one of the places you'd be visiting. Barter Books is great for a rake around in. Cragside house just outside Rothbury is interesting to look around, it was the first house in the UK to be powered by hydro-electricity. Plus you can get nicely lost in the grounds and not see a soul.

I suspect you may have already seen this, but just in case www.visitnorthumberland.com/ The only trouble with Northumberland is it's quite a large county and it can take a while to get around it.

Simonside is a great walk to do as well, the view at the top of the crag is stunning.
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Tue 27 Mar 2012, 17:49, Reply)

When I was in Naples
I saw a grown man in tight red jeans, a weird floral blouse type thing, a leather bum bag and cool dude shades.

I suspect he was Barry's Italian cousin.
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Tue 27 Mar 2012, 17:26, Reply)

l +pi
( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Tue 27 Mar 2012, 17:32, Reply)

That doesn't even make sense.
Anyway, they hadn't even invented bum bags back in the 1940s when I was in nappies.
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Tue 27 Mar 2012, 17:33, Reply)

It makes sense to me ma'am

( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Tue 27 Mar 2012, 17:36, Reply)

Nope, I can't work that one out.

( scarpe We Stole Bikes, Tue 27 Mar 2012, 17:34, Reply)

There was a fight?
And I wasn't around to hover at the back chirping "Give 'im one for me"?

/BUMSEX
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 27 Mar 2012, 17:26, Reply)

It was more handbags to be honest.

( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Tue 27 Mar 2012, 17:26, Reply)

I like handbags.
A girl can never have too many handbags.
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Tue 27 Mar 2012, 17:28, Reply)

Or shoes apparantly

( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Tue 27 Mar 2012, 17:31, Reply)

I don't think either of us saw today's play coming did we old chap

(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 27 Mar 2012, 17:33, Reply)

Certainly didn't. I can see this beeing a 2-0 series to the Sri Lankans

( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Tue 27 Mar 2012, 17:34, Reply)

Unfortunately I concur
The established batsmen, Bell aside, looked hopeless and are obviously feeling pressure to perform - you can tell because the bowlers went out and twatted a very ordinary attack all over the place!

At least two batsmen need to stand up and have decent knocks in the second innings or we might as well go home now
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 27 Mar 2012, 17:36, Reply)

I might be biased
but I imagine that RF allowed Quentin to rile him and told him where to stick his "personality" in a fair and reasonable manner, and Quentin didn't appreciate it none too much
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 27 Mar 2012, 17:31, Reply)

There is a lot of penis in this thread
this is not necessarily a bad thing
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Tue 27 Mar 2012, 17:35, Reply)

What's your opinion on cockgazzes, Captain?
*unzips*
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 27 Mar 2012, 17:36, Reply)

ummm
One I had was a fine piece of poultry
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Tue 27 Mar 2012, 17:40, Reply)

It depends who it is attached to

( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Tue 27 Mar 2012, 17:37, Reply)

this is true
also: how often they wash it
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Tue 27 Mar 2012, 17:40, Reply)

Your standards are set too high.

( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Tue 27 Mar 2012, 17:42, Reply)

Have you scored any larp cock yet?

( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Tue 27 Mar 2012, 17:41, Reply)

or just any cock really

( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Tue 27 Mar 2012, 17:42, Reply)

Are you after tips?

( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Tue 27 Mar 2012, 17:43, Reply)

Go on, how do you ensnare an octogenarian love beast

( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Tue 27 Mar 2012, 17:47, Reply)

Flash your tits at them

( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Tue 27 Mar 2012, 17:48, Reply)

*TAKES NOTE*

( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Tue 27 Mar 2012, 17:49, Reply)

nope :(
did get into a little watersports with two chaps at the weekend


actually it was a waterfight
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Tue 27 Mar 2012, 17:43, Reply)

Mental handicaps are usually up for it, volunteer

( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Tue 27 Mar 2012, 17:46, Reply)