Morning all!
It's Friday, it's almost 7am, it's knackerjack!

I am in a tremendously good mood this morning for some reason. My bosses are away for 2 weeks so I'm THE BOSS

Are you a boss? Nicest/nastiest things done by your bosses? Friday also means a lunchtime pint as it has just been payday too

Alt:
Weekend plans. Cat rape? A little Internet stalking? Pub? Anyone?
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 4 May 2012, 6:52, 216 replies, latest was 12 years ago)

morning Sporters
I'm on a train. Really looking forward to moving into my London flat so I can stop getting up at QUARTER TO SIX.

I'm not the boss of anyone.I'm barely in charge of me. At my leaving presentation my last boss said how much they'd all miss my withering putdowns, not sure if that was nice or nasty.
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Fri 4 May 2012, 7:12, Reply)

I think that's the ultimate accolade, personally.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 4 May 2012, 8:25, Reply)

morning! Sat at my desk starting work...then off to pick up a sofa
YOUR NOT THE BOSS OF ME!

alt: this and that
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 4 May 2012, 7:17, Reply)

And you're not so big.

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Fri 4 May 2012, 8:43, Reply)

Alright Sporty

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 4 May 2012, 7:36, Reply)

Oi Jeff! Over here!
Alright?
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 4 May 2012, 8:30, Reply)

Alright mate.
almost the bank holiday, doing anything fun?
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 4 May 2012, 8:58, Reply)

See below. I genuinely don't know

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 4 May 2012, 9:03, Reply)

You should have said you were
At a loose end, I'd have come up and visited you.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 4 May 2012, 9:10, Reply)

Alright Sporters
Higlight of my day will be a blood test this afternoon. This means that I can't have even a cup of tea before then. It does mean that I finish work at 1:00pm though as my doctor's is back in Luton. Yay me.

I have got to suck up to some arsehole clients before then. They will be here soon.
( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Fri 4 May 2012, 7:55, Reply)

Yo Sporto!
I'm theoretically my own boss - but I do report to the German directors of the company. They've not done anything nasty to me, they even pay me regularly!
Weekend will involve, playing guitar, evening meal out with G/F, tidying gardens (if the monsoons ever let up) a couple of roast dinners and drink - not necessarily in that order.
(Captain Placid 24/7 ball gags, brownie mix and clown porn, Fri 4 May 2012, 7:55, Reply)

I do manage/ lead a large team.
Too many direct reports (22) - this needs to change and is happening.
12,000 restaurant staff come under my team's responsibility.

This afternoon I have to go to Milton Keynes. I am unimpressed by this.
( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Fri 4 May 2012, 8:01, Reply)

cunt punch chompy for me while you're there

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 4 May 2012, 8:06, Reply)

No time. I want to be in and out as quickly as possible*
*because that's how your mum likes it.
( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Fri 4 May 2012, 8:08, Reply)

quick and dirty that's mother!

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 4 May 2012, 8:14, Reply)

mother amore
( Reginald Donkeyfuck, Fri 4 May 2012, 9:01, Reply)

Ha ha.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Fri 4 May 2012, 9:03, Reply)

Milton Keynes
A soulless place.
(Captain Placid 24/7 ball gags, brownie mix and clown porn, Fri 4 May 2012, 8:12, Reply)

Do you deal with the hotel branch of your business at all?
Also, did you follow that tip yesterday?
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Fri 4 May 2012, 8:44, Reply)

No to both. Forgot to put a bet on & hotels are a separate business unit.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Fri 4 May 2012, 9:01, Reply)

what anout the deep fat friers? i know they dont sale Mars Bars but if you nip across the road do you think they'll let you uss them?

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Fri 4 May 2012, 9:08, Reply)

Ahh, fair enough
And unlucky, the bet ended up coming off!
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Fri 4 May 2012, 9:09, Reply)

So I saw. The winnings would have paid for the parking ticket I got yesterday.
£130 or £65 if paid within 7 days.
( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Fri 4 May 2012, 9:12, Reply)

Oof, fucking hell

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Fri 4 May 2012, 9:19, Reply)

Mini ape has a new friend
born this morning at 7lbs 8oz :)
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 4 May 2012, 8:13, Reply)

Congratulations. Boy or girl?

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Fri 4 May 2012, 8:15, Reply)

fucks sake
I don't care how big and impressive it is, you shouldn't let your baby play with your shit
(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Fri 4 May 2012, 8:18, Reply)

Hahahahaha 10/10

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 4 May 2012, 8:27, Reply)

Hahaha

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 4 May 2012, 8:42, Reply)

You have a second child?
Or someone you know has?
(Bazongaloid, Fri 4 May 2012, 8:21, Reply)

Friend has had a little girl

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 4 May 2012, 8:42, Reply)

You twat.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Fri 4 May 2012, 8:47, Reply)

I thought I'd spread some happy news
Bu if news of peoples lunch, shit weekends of warhammer playing and crippling emotional issues is more interesting I'll stick to that.




Twat
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 4 May 2012, 8:51, Reply)

Yes. Stick to what you know.
You prolapsed twat.
( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Fri 4 May 2012, 8:55, Reply)

Go on Battered, 'it 'im

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 4 May 2012, 8:56, Reply)

CALL HIM A TWAT AGAIN!!

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 4 May 2012, 8:56, Reply)

Alright?
He's knows he's a twat, he doesn't need telling again.

Yet.



The twat.
( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Fri 4 May 2012, 8:59, Reply)

I think a gentle reminder might not be a bad thing.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 4 May 2012, 9:01, Reply)

I think my sig should do it.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Fri 4 May 2012, 9:04, Reply)

It's common knowledge that you aren't 'big'

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 4 May 2012, 9:23, Reply)

This is exciting news!
Someone who you don't know, who is friends with someone else you don't know online has had a child you will never meet or give a second thought to.
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 4 May 2012, 8:42, Reply)

We must have pictures!!!!!!

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 4 May 2012, 8:45, Reply)

The arrogance of the man, assuming that just because he's friends kid is less than a year younger than his own
that they will grow to be friends themselves, is quite astounding.

I heard that his friends kid already thinks that his child is a tedious cunt of the highest order.
(Bazongaloid, Fri 4 May 2012, 8:50, Reply)

'your the same age, you'll be friends'
'no we won't mum, he pulls the wings off insects and shits himself'

'be nice ape, poor Al is a lon way from his "home"'
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 4 May 2012, 8:55, Reply)

I heard he fiddles with his kid.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 4 May 2012, 8:56, Reply)

how'd you break into the gorilla enclosure?
Again?
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Fri 4 May 2012, 8:27, Reply)

No-one cares.
WHY WON'T YOU JUST DIE?
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 4 May 2012, 8:28, Reply)

Oh man, what was the sex like? I bet it was good.

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Fri 4 May 2012, 8:38, Reply)

Maybe one day you'll get to find out

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 4 May 2012, 8:42, Reply)

I hope so !

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Fri 4 May 2012, 8:46, Reply)

Congratulations fella!

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Fri 4 May 2012, 8:46, Reply)

masters graduation today innit
So I am mincing around oxford like a mincer in ridiculous gowns and a "ladies cap". It is not, as such, a good look.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 4 May 2012, 8:19, Reply)

Like a gay Batman.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 4 May 2012, 8:27, Reply)

Morning, you fucking wankers.
I am 2nd in command in my firm, and nominally head of my department, but it's a small company and my boss micro-manages everything so it's fairly meaningless, if I am completely honest.

Alt: No kid this weekend, and no Lusty as she's working the next three nights. What do you suggest I do? Apart from DYAAKYing, of course.

In other news, Lidl's Black Forest Ham is fucking incredible and stupendous value. You get about ten bits for two quid.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 4 May 2012, 8:27, Reply)

Your job sounds similar to mine.
Alt: I think the answer you probably want is: go round stunned's, drink all his decent booze, have him cook for you, then hoover up whatever MDs he has to hand.
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 4 May 2012, 8:40, Reply)

Parasite lolz

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 4 May 2012, 8:40, Reply)

This seems like a tremendous idea

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 4 May 2012, 9:06, Reply)

ALL BACK TO STUNNED'S!!

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 4 May 2012, 9:09, Reply)

PARTY!
Pull up a woman.
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Fri 4 May 2012, 9:20, Reply)

Make yourself a large batch of bleach martinis
Are you in charge of finance at your company?
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 4 May 2012, 8:40, Reply)

My main duties consist of smashing your wife's back doors in whilst you are at work.
It's nice to be able to see my other kid as well. You're doing a great job of parenting there - thanks mate.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 4 May 2012, 8:43, Reply)

hahaha!

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 4 May 2012, 9:07, Reply)

Morning
There are only the owners of the business above me, then the workers below me. I sit in the middle knowing all the answers that each side wants to know and belonging to neither group.

Alt: Little tangle is going away with his aunt on Saturday and Sunday night, so I'm trying to find a way to get rid of the Mrs and baby tangle too. Other than mundane domestic duties there will be curry and beer and much listening to records.
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 4 May 2012, 8:37, Reply)

I treated myself to one, measly record yesterday.
It's the first one I have been able to buy in about a year :((((((
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 4 May 2012, 8:42, Reply)

Is 'now that's what I call music 89' out already?
I'd better gaz Gonz
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 4 May 2012, 8:43, Reply)

What did you get?
I've been quite profligate with record buying recently, in anticipation of having a smaller income later in the year when the missus' maternity pay ends.
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 4 May 2012, 8:48, Reply)

'The Youth are getting Restless', Bad Brains live in Amsterdam 1987.
My brother maintains it's their finest record. As Rastafarian punk bands go, I think they're my favourite.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 4 May 2012, 8:50, Reply)

I don't know any of their stuff
But they look suspiciously like some kind of fusion band, which is rarely a good thing.
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 4 May 2012, 8:53, Reply)

Fuck no they are mental punk, occasionally breaking down into reggae.
If you want an idea of their style, I recommend the songs 'Attitude' and 'Formaldehyde'.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 4 May 2012, 8:55, Reply)

I shall use some modern form of online-based free listening to investigate.

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 4 May 2012, 9:00, Reply)

They make much the most sense live.
I've a DVD of them at CBGB's in 1982 which is MENKLE.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 4 May 2012, 9:07, Reply)

They played Bristol?

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 4 May 2012, 9:22, Reply)

Eh?

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 4 May 2012, 9:30, Reply)

CHCB.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Fri 4 May 2012, 9:31, Reply)

Reggae seems to mix well with other genres
Skindred are also examples of this.
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Fri 4 May 2012, 9:11, Reply)

Morning Sporto
I've had superiority over several people in the time I've been here, and technically I can order around any bureau staff. But I don't, as that would make me a tosser.

The nicest thing he's done was buy me a Heineken keg on my 21st.
The nastiest thing he's done is probably when he made several staff members redundant on the day of the Christmas Do, then spent the evening talking about a 'great year'.

Whilst I would like a pint, I'm sadly forbidden during work hours.

Alt: I've got a girl round tonight, watch the football tomorrow, few mates round on Sunday night.

I'm rather happy at the moment, as I had two bets come off yesterday to the tune of £140, woo hoo!
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Fri 4 May 2012, 8:43, Reply)

Don't become a gambling addict, AA.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 4 May 2012, 8:49, Reply)

I won't
I never bet more than £5, and it's rare for me to bet.
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Fri 4 May 2012, 8:49, Reply)

It's a slippery slope.

(Bazongaloid, Fri 4 May 2012, 8:50, Reply)

Aye, true
As I say, I stick to £5 at a time, as it's an amount of money I wouldn't be too fussed about losing.
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Fri 4 May 2012, 8:53, Reply)

I bet you a tenner you do!

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 4 May 2012, 8:51, Reply)

I worked with a fellow whose only vice was gambling.
He had a separate account for it, into which he'd put ten grand. After a decade, during which at times he'd had over a hundred grand in there, he had roughly ten grand.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 4 May 2012, 8:51, Reply)

Not good.

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Fri 4 May 2012, 8:52, Reply)

Not really.
He was philosophical about it, though, and treated it as a hobby rather than as a deluded 'get rich' scheme.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 4 May 2012, 8:53, Reply)

Breaking even after 10 years is a pretty good outcome all things considered

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 4 May 2012, 8:56, Reply)

Not compared to the return of the FTSE during that time. He'd have been better off working with a broker to do that.
After ten years of sensible hedged investing he could have made £30k easily.
( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Fri 4 May 2012, 9:01, Reply)

I'd have paid him 31k to kill NakedApe.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 4 May 2012, 9:02, Reply)

This may be the cause of your financial woes

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 4 May 2012, 9:21, Reply)

Thanks Ivan Boesky.
Wise words.
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Fri 4 May 2012, 9:09, Reply)

My pleasure Mr Ponzi.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Fri 4 May 2012, 9:10, Reply)

And what time do you call this?

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 4 May 2012, 9:12, Reply)

Can you not afford a watch?

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Fri 4 May 2012, 9:14, Reply)

No.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 4 May 2012, 9:17, Reply)

9.18

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Fri 4 May 2012, 9:19, Reply)

LIES^

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 4 May 2012, 9:21, Reply)

Certainly makes more sense to play it that way
The first bet was from a tip, the second was using the same money I'd spent on the first one, having withdrawn my winnings.
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Fri 4 May 2012, 8:56, Reply)

I've got two friends called William Hill
What are the odds of that?
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 4 May 2012, 9:02, Reply)

Oh Jeff.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 4 May 2012, 9:06, Reply)

Please do me a favour.
Get a piece of A4 paper and one of your large crayons. Then write LTI on the paper in big letters and sellotape it to the front of your screen.

Thank you.
( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Fri 4 May 2012, 9:06, Reply)

I like this

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 4 May 2012, 9:21, Reply)

I see our friend James has been posting on QOTW again.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Fri 4 May 2012, 9:14, Reply)

Will he never learn?

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 4 May 2012, 9:18, Reply)

Perhaps he will if we continue to remind him how shit his book is.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Fri 4 May 2012, 9:29, Reply)

Weekend plans include
Best friend's 21st tonight. Plan on getting wankered and enjoying myself.
Swing Dance night tomorrow night. Have had my ticket for nearly two months.
Work sunday. :(
(Poppet some assembly required., Fri 4 May 2012, 9:19, Reply)

Have you guys got a public holiday on Monday?

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Fri 4 May 2012, 9:20, Reply)

WE HAVE!

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 4 May 2012, 9:21, Reply)

is it the Queen's birthday or summat?

(Poppet some assembly required., Fri 4 May 2012, 9:25, Reply)

You should know when your head of state's birthday is

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 4 May 2012, 9:26, Reply)

I know when it is here - 10th of June.

(Poppet some assembly required., Fri 4 May 2012, 9:26, Reply)

This works out very well as Mrs Cows 40th is on the 11th
This means we get a free holiday for it.
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 4 May 2012, 9:27, Reply)

only if you get the holiday on the same day for it.

(Poppet some assembly required., Fri 4 May 2012, 9:30, Reply)

It means I get a week in Menorca for 2 days holiday!

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 4 May 2012, 9:31, Reply)

Menorca?
I thought you wanted a holiday.
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Fri 4 May 2012, 9:35, Reply)

I am married with two kids
It has a free bar and a pool. This is as good as it gets for me
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 4 May 2012, 9:38, Reply)

Who gives a fuck!
I dont think it is, no
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 4 May 2012, 9:26, Reply)

It's a bizarre observation of pre-Christian pagan May Day celebrations.
I love this kind of thing.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 4 May 2012, 9:27, Reply)

Well, you would. :P

(Poppet some assembly required., Fri 4 May 2012, 9:28, Reply)

Yes, yes I would.
PS I've not forgotten about your request re drawing. I haven't done it, either, mind you.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 4 May 2012, 9:31, Reply)

Thats okay mate, I'm not in a rush.
still trying to get the word out there that I'm around is all.
(Poppet some assembly required., Fri 4 May 2012, 9:39, Reply)

No sadly we don't.
I have uni stuff to do instead.
(Poppet some assembly required., Fri 4 May 2012, 9:23, Reply)

Boo!

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Fri 4 May 2012, 9:23, Reply)

I don't really mind.
I need to catch up on study anyway.
(Poppet some assembly required., Fri 4 May 2012, 9:25, Reply)

My brother sent me a text at 6:52 this morning
that read 'Billy Ocean - Caribbean Queen. Genius'

There are several things that are badly wrong about that.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 4 May 2012, 9:22, Reply)

I think your brother and I are sharing the same dream.

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Fri 4 May 2012, 9:24, Reply)

Damn you.

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 4 May 2012, 9:25, Reply)

Get outta his car
or something
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 4 May 2012, 9:26, Reply)

Hahahah

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 4 May 2012, 9:27, Reply)

Perhaps he shared the same dream?

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 4 May 2012, 9:24, Reply)

Tsk.
Do try and keep up, Tangers.
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Fri 4 May 2012, 9:28, Reply)

Its the lack of iron and protein

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 4 May 2012, 9:29, Reply)

Needs moar Black Forest Ham.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 4 May 2012, 9:30, Reply)

This is good advice

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 4 May 2012, 9:31, Reply)

You can't beat a bit of German pork between your cheeks.

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Fri 4 May 2012, 9:34, Reply)

desklols

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 4 May 2012, 9:34, Reply)

Hahahaha

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 4 May 2012, 9:37, Reply)

ROLFMAYO.

( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Fri 4 May 2012, 9:43, Reply)

I TOLD YOU, I'M NOT SWALLOWING!!!

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 4 May 2012, 9:31, Reply)

It is still meat eating

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 4 May 2012, 9:31, Reply)

That's not what you said to Billy Ocean
round the back of the Wolverhampton Gaumont, June 14th 1986.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 4 May 2012, 9:32, Reply)

You only know this as you were next in the queue

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 4 May 2012, 9:34, Reply)

And how do you know this?
Because YOU were Billy's 'fluffer' on that tour. Unpaid, I might add.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 4 May 2012, 9:35, Reply)

It's a vocation
Get outta my cock
Get into my mouth
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 4 May 2012, 9:36, Reply)

Hahahaha.

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Fri 4 May 2012, 9:37, Reply)

That's the sort of job where you'd pay Billy for the privilege.

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Fri 4 May 2012, 9:37, Reply)

52% of Billy's net income is from paid fluffing internships.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 4 May 2012, 9:38, Reply)

He's the fluffiest man alive

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 4 May 2012, 9:39, Reply)

I think you need to change your sig to 'Billy Ocean's unpaid fluffer, 1986 tour'

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 4 May 2012, 9:41, Reply)

- The Sucksessor To Monty

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 4 May 2012, 9:43, Reply)

Too much love on the run!
I'm smoking this morning.
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Fri 4 May 2012, 9:33, Reply)

+crack

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 4 May 2012, 9:35, Reply)

I find cigarettes help when the going gets tough.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Fri 4 May 2012, 9:38, Reply)

You know the internet, right?

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 4 May 2012, 9:39, Reply)

What of it?

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Fri 4 May 2012, 9:39, Reply)

Leave it. Immediately.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 4 May 2012, 9:40, Reply)

C'mon! That was comedy gold.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Fri 4 May 2012, 9:42, Reply)

For a Ronnie Corbett-alike

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 4 May 2012, 9:43, Reply)

Panty 'ose?

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 4 May 2012, 9:44, Reply)

Four candles?

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Fri 4 May 2012, 9:44, Reply)

I've got about 3 people working for me, so I suppose I must be
If you count PhD students, 6 or 7.

both the nicest and nastiest thing was a written warning to a guy who worked for me when I was in industry. Nice because I should have sacked the cunt for gross misconduct but I bottled it.

Alt: It's my wedding anniversary so I suppose I should do something, really. Is a pint and a burger acceptable, do you think? LOLJK I'm taking her to a very lovely restaurant. Mind, it was in the Guardian Weekend the other week so it'll be full of tofu-knitting fucktards no doubt.
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Fri 4 May 2012, 9:42, Reply)

'Tofu-knitting fucktards'
I am SO stealing that!
(Captain Placid 24/7 ball gags, brownie mix and clown porn, Fri 4 May 2012, 9:44, Reply)

One weekend Tayyab's was in the Guardian on the Saturday and then the Observer on the Sunday.
The place was ruined after that. Middle class knobends complaining about queuing when they were about to have a fantastic dinner for about a fucking tenner.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 4 May 2012, 9:50, Reply)

Quinten (one of them) just deleted something there and broke it all

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 4 May 2012, 9:52, Reply)

I have just noticed an anagram of your user name is 'bent yom coy'.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Fri 4 May 2012, 9:53, Reply)

You weird cunt.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 4 May 2012, 9:55, Reply)

'acuteness footed runty' is an anagram of 'set your faces to stunned'

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Fri 4 May 2012, 9:59, Reply)

You are the runty round here, right?

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 4 May 2012, 10:03, Reply)

Battered = 'bed treat'

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Fri 4 May 2012, 10:04, Reply)

Bread tet

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 4 May 2012, 10:07, Reply)

Capital D Panic
Best I could come up with for mine
(Captain Placid 24/7 ball gags, brownie mix and clown porn, Fri 4 May 2012, 10:26, Reply)

Oddly, this place is an Indian, too
It was where they sent the Weekend "date" pair last week. Been meaning to go there for ages but it's pretty fucking expensive so needed a decent excuse.
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Fri 4 May 2012, 9:58, Reply)

i was reading about indians last night
geronimo and cochise were motherfucking hardcore
(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Fri 4 May 2012, 10:02, Reply)

I'm kinda lucky when it comes to Indian food
There's loads of good, cheap Indian restaurants, takeaways and cafes in Coventry - especially down the Foleshill road. Mind you, the one Tangledupinblue recommended the other week was excellent!
If only we had a good Chinese!
(Captain Placid 24/7 ball gags, brownie mix and clown porn, Fri 4 May 2012, 10:02, Reply)

did quinten oftiweak just delete his subthread?

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Fri 4 May 2012, 9:52, Reply)

Yep

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 4 May 2012, 9:52, Reply)

what

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Fri 4 May 2012, 9:56, Reply)

Yes.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Fri 4 May 2012, 9:52, Reply)

a

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Fri 4 May 2012, 9:56, Reply)

YES!
I'm spent
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 4 May 2012, 9:53, Reply)

prick

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Fri 4 May 2012, 9:56, Reply)

NO need

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 4 May 2012, 9:59, Reply)

i was not calling sportscow a prick, if you look at the replies posted above yours i replied
What
A
(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Fri 4 May 2012, 10:01, Reply)

No you didn't
Look again, Stevie Wonder
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 4 May 2012, 10:05, Reply)

yeah i did, look at my first reply to you, then battered then you again

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Fri 4 May 2012, 10:07, Reply)

So I got
what
prick

Should have gone to spacksavers
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 4 May 2012, 10:09, Reply)

have you got battered on ignore?

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Fri 4 May 2012, 10:15, Reply)

Already way past 'Billy Ocean Roundabout'

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 4 May 2012, 10:01, Reply)

I'm on the Coast Road
(This will only make sense to those who know where that is)
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 4 May 2012, 10:06, Reply)

Ha

( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Fri 4 May 2012, 10:30, Reply)

I think the negative reviews of his Billy Ocean parody must have upset him.
He badly misjudged how it would go down. Clearly didn't realise he was dealing with some serious Billy fans who wouldn't take kindly to seeing the Bill-meister's work interfered with.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 4 May 2012, 9:58, Reply)

he's only ruining the good name of quinten further still
a real quinten would have stood up for himself
(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Fri 4 May 2012, 9:59, Reply)

There's nothing right about the fellow.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 4 May 2012, 10:00, Reply)

Don't fuck with Billy
That's MY job
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 4 May 2012, 10:00, Reply)

I'd join you for a lunchtime pint sporters.
But I'm saving my liver for later when I meet an old mate in town.
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Fri 4 May 2012, 9:56, Reply)

Maybe next week then

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 4 May 2012, 9:57, Reply)

I shall check my diary.

( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Fri 4 May 2012, 9:58, Reply)

I'll have my people talk to your people

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 4 May 2012, 10:00, Reply)

How's the job going?

( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Fri 4 May 2012, 10:00, Reply)

Fucking hell. Look who it is.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 4 May 2012, 10:01, Reply)

*waves*
Morning TBG
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 4 May 2012, 10:03, Reply)

Good, ta.
Contract was extended for another month and a fair chance of longer term or permanent as they're rolling out new grant programmes soon.
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Fri 4 May 2012, 10:03, Reply)

Aww
I read that as giant programmes
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 4 May 2012, 10:07, Reply)

Well, fuck me with a spark plug spanner.
Grammsie. how's tricks?
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Fri 4 May 2012, 10:07, Reply)

Looks like she's gone again.

( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Fri 4 May 2012, 10:09, Reply)

damn her. damn her to hell.

( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Fri 4 May 2012, 10:17, Reply)

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 4 May 2012, 10:04, Reply)

He's touring:
www.billyocean.co.uk/tour.html
( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Fri 4 May 2012, 10:17, Reply)

OCEANBASH!!!!!!!!

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 4 May 2012, 10:28, Reply)

I report to the MD and have a part time underling who pretty much looks after himself
My current boss is pretty easy going, so no complaint there. One of my previous bosses was a Willie Thorne-looking motherfucker who dressed like a PE teacher when there was any weekend overtime. Despite all this he was knobbing at least two fairly attractive underlings in his time behind his wife's back.

Alt: Not much on this weekend, trip to the cinema maybe. Just got some tickets for the Sweeney Todd musical in July for a joint wife and son birthday day out. Looking for somewhere central, quick and not too expensive for lunch while we're there. Is the Fire and Stone pizza place any good?
( Bill Clay a.k.a. Claudio, Fri 4 May 2012, 10:10, Reply)

Yes.
Who just broke the internet?

I had to re-boot my machine.
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Fri 4 May 2012, 10:13, Reply)

I blame that Billy Ocean fellow.
Coming over here, breaking our internet.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 4 May 2012, 10:16, Reply)

I know!
Playing with the WMM.
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Fri 4 May 2012, 10:17, Reply)

Start a new thread
That'll show him
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 4 May 2012, 10:18, Reply)