I am awake. I have no hangover
but I was almost sick on the train home last night.

Everyone I met last night for the first time was lovely...even sexface who tasted of metrosexual moisturiser.

I'm deeply hurt that I'm not one of Gonz's house band but I expect that's because I didn't go back to his place with CHCB, sexface and Captain V for the promised orgy. ;-)

PJM is gutted that he was too ill to make it and he loves his MTFU badge, as do I - oh and he is very happy to hear that the lovely Labia is a cyclist too.

Right, now to think about breakfast and maybe off to the cinema to leer at Christian Bale.

Oh...[insert obligatory question here]?
( chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Sun 14 Jun 2009, 11:51, Reply)

The answer is yes

( Mary's sexbox explosion makes me The Jesus, Sun 14 Jun 2009, 11:53, Reply)

I'm glad we've got that sorted out
I wonder if other people feel the same way?

Perhaps they'd like to add their opinions and maybe some experiences of it.
( chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Sun 14 Jun 2009, 11:54, Reply)

8 Ball says:
Maybe.
(Potty Jag har smör i min rumpspringa, Sun 14 Jun 2009, 11:55, Reply)

But does the 8 ball have experience of this?
I say no.
( chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Sun 14 Jun 2009, 11:56, Reply)

no it isn't

(Psyc-Ho-Ho-Ho-Chomp **bearer of the waki crown**, Sun 14 Jun 2009, 12:01, Reply)

Banana
*passes tissue to catch the drool*
(Potty Jag har smör i min rumpspringa, Sun 14 Jun 2009, 11:54, Reply)

I didn't get a mtfu badge
:(
(Psyc-Ho-Ho-Ho-Chomp **bearer of the waki crown**, Sun 14 Jun 2009, 12:01, Reply)

You didn't?
Apologies, I thought I'd given everyone a badge :/
( Labia Majora when you're feeling down, I'll feel you up, Sun 14 Jun 2009, 12:09, Reply)

I lost mine :(
And my sunglasses!
( Captain V, Sun 14 Jun 2009, 12:10, Reply)

And a little innocence

( Labia Majora when you're feeling down, I'll feel you up, Sun 14 Jun 2009, 12:15, Reply)

I've been shown things
That would make a pornstars hair curl.
( Captain V, Sun 14 Jun 2009, 12:17, Reply)

You were promised things
that would have made you a porn star.
( chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Sun 14 Jun 2009, 12:21, Reply)

There is the small matter of a videotape

( Captain V, Sun 14 Jun 2009, 12:23, Reply)

I'm sure Gonz would have obliged
He had accepted he'd be watching anyway...
( chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Sun 14 Jun 2009, 12:26, Reply)

no problem,
I thought it was because I don't need to man up.
(Psyc-Ho-Ho-Ho-Chomp **bearer of the waki crown**, Sun 14 Jun 2009, 12:11, Reply)

You're just walking into that one

( chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Sun 14 Jun 2009, 12:12, Reply)

I'm afraid my band is a first-come first-"\m/ (^-^) \m/ rawk " basses, on account of my copy'n'pasting the guest list for last night =)
Maybe in another life, somewhere, somehow, a guy like me can get an orgy like that.

I can't remember who I was talking to about the whole Dan Le Sac thinggy, but this is the album...
open.spotify.com/user/s9psilver/playlist/6vYY9ag0Dd1Z2bRhb9cjkw
( Dance, Gonz, where ever you may be, for you are the lord of the dance settee. Disclaimer: I'm joking, soz for potential offence., Sun 14 Jun 2009, 12:04, Reply)

There was something about lemon cheesecake that I can't quite remember.

( Dance, Gonz, where ever you may be, for you are the lord of the dance settee. Disclaimer: I'm joking, soz for potential offence., Sun 14 Jun 2009, 12:06, Reply)

But Scarpe didn't even go!
*cries*

*MTFU*

*licks*

I'll get you next time.
( chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Sun 14 Jun 2009, 12:07, Reply)

I have no idea who that is, to be honest.
I hear that Chase Farm Mental Unit are now prescribing MTFU with a good dose of "Sor' i' ou' ma'e".
( Dance, Gonz, where ever you may be, for you are the lord of the dance settee. Disclaimer: I'm joking, soz for potential offence., Sun 14 Jun 2009, 12:15, Reply)

Excellent!

( chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Sun 14 Jun 2009, 12:20, Reply)

I love the music of
Invalid Spotify Resource.

It's really modern and thoughtprovoking.
( The Light In Giftwrap won't play poker with the Skull Spark Joker, Sun 14 Jun 2009, 12:10, Reply)

Oooh, ok.
Just search for "Dan Le Sac" then, or not, I don't know.
( Dance, Gonz, where ever you may be, for you are the lord of the dance settee. Disclaimer: I'm joking, soz for potential offence., Sun 14 Jun 2009, 12:12, Reply)

All I have to say is
I'm not doing a 155 mile walk of shame this morning.
( Captain V, Sun 14 Jun 2009, 12:08, Reply)

This is good
Always best to keep yourself 'nice'
( chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Sun 14 Jun 2009, 12:12, Reply)

I'm not sure I understand
:(
( Captain V, Sun 14 Jun 2009, 12:13, Reply)

You keep yourself 'nice'
by not sleeping around.


So I'm told.
( chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Sun 14 Jun 2009, 12:14, Reply)

Oh
bugger
( Captain V, Sun 14 Jun 2009, 12:16, Reply)

threat?
or promise?
( crackhouseceilidhband I'd sell your heart to the junkman baby for a buck, Sun 14 Jun 2009, 12:18, Reply)

I thought you didn't do off topic!

( Rocking Around the SexFace Tree Marley and Marley...WOOOOOO, Sun 14 Jun 2009, 12:19, Reply)

She can't help it
She's drawn here by her primal urges.
( Labia Majora when you're feeling down, I'll feel you up, Sun 14 Jun 2009, 12:22, Reply)

aye, well,
I'd hate to miss out on a bash postmortem
( crackhouseceilidhband I'd sell your heart to the junkman baby for a buck, Sun 14 Jun 2009, 12:22, Reply)

I'm disappointed in your lack of response to my very generous offer!

( Rocking Around the SexFace Tree Marley and Marley...WOOOOOO, Sun 14 Jun 2009, 12:24, Reply)

Dear Sexface
Firstly, I would like to thank you for your application. It was coharent and you made an excelent prospect.

As I'm sure you're made aware, these are tough times, and our industry is hit the hardest. Although our organisation is going from strengh to strengh, we are prepairing for the worst. As such, our planned expansion into subindustrys shall be put on hold for the forseeable future.

In light of these curcamstances, it is with much regret, that we would have to respectfully decline your services. I shall, with your permision, keep your application on file, should the eventuality occer that we could use (and/or) outsource services to you.

Kind Regards

Gonz

B3ta - OffTopic Dept. | 07525 123 456 | HumanResources@offtopic.b3ta.com
( Dance, Gonz, where ever you may be, for you are the lord of the dance settee. Disclaimer: I'm joking, soz for potential offence., Sun 14 Jun 2009, 12:41, Reply)

During the Dry Season
she'll do anything.

That's standard for b3ta women.
( chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Sun 14 Jun 2009, 12:23, Reply)

CHCB said she was going to refrain from commenting on this
As she didn't want to be crude!
( Captain V, Sun 14 Jun 2009, 12:27, Reply)

Is she next to you then?
*prepares for gossip*
( chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Sun 14 Jun 2009, 12:29, Reply)

Erm
Technically yes.
( Captain V, Sun 14 Jun 2009, 12:31, Reply)

w00t!

( chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Sun 14 Jun 2009, 12:35, Reply)

That's what she said

( Captain V, Sun 14 Jun 2009, 12:36, Reply)

Ah, so you did cop off with ONE of them then?
;-)
(PJM Does not love Liberace, Sun 14 Jun 2009, 12:36, Reply)

All my hard work paid off, just not for me :P

( Rocking Around the SexFace Tree Marley and Marley...WOOOOOO, Sun 14 Jun 2009, 12:35, Reply)

for shame

( Mary's sexbox explosion makes me The Jesus, Sun 14 Jun 2009, 12:49, Reply)

Oh dear....you're *not* nice!
And all that lovely hair too....

Never mind, it makes you perfect CHCB fodder.
( chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Sun 14 Jun 2009, 12:19, Reply)

Consider me
Well and truly foddered.
( Captain V, Sun 14 Jun 2009, 12:20, Reply)

WHORE

( Mary's sexbox explosion makes me The Jesus, Sun 14 Jun 2009, 12:50, Reply)

You say that as though it's a bad thing

( Captain V, Sun 14 Jun 2009, 12:53, Reply)

It's ok, I was called a whore on facebook
and I kissed more girls than you did :)
( Mary's sexbox explosion makes me The Jesus, Sun 14 Jun 2009, 12:58, Reply)

I probably kissed more men though
Even if I don't include CHCB.
( Captain V, Sun 14 Jun 2009, 13:02, Reply)

I licked more faces
wins pissing contest
( Mary's sexbox explosion makes me The Jesus, Sun 14 Jun 2009, 13:06, Reply)

Hmmm
*pisses*

Definitely wins pissing contest.
( Captain V, Sun 14 Jun 2009, 13:14, Reply)

yes,
but an expensive one.
( crackhouseceilidhband I'd sell your heart to the junkman baby for a buck, Sun 14 Jun 2009, 12:58, Reply)

Damn straight
Still haven't seen any of the money you owe me though!
( Captain V, Sun 14 Jun 2009, 13:01, Reply)

because you said
satisfaction guaranteed or your money back
( crackhouseceilidhband I'd sell your heart to the junkman baby for a buck, Sun 14 Jun 2009, 13:04, Reply)

Indeed I did
But I meant my satisfaction.
( Captain V, Sun 14 Jun 2009, 13:10, Reply)

I won't be walking,
I'll be taking the train.
( crackhouseceilidhband I'd sell your heart to the junkman baby for a buck, Sun 14 Jun 2009, 12:24, Reply)

Walkin' like a cowboy?

( Dance, Gonz, where ever you may be, for you are the lord of the dance settee. Disclaimer: I'm joking, soz for potential offence., Sun 14 Jun 2009, 13:02, Reply)

aye,
it's like Brokeback Mountain here.
( crackhouseceilidhband I'd sell your heart to the junkman baby for a buck, Sun 14 Jun 2009, 13:15, Reply)

Lovely to meet you too!
I woke up still drunk, but have managed to dodge a hangover.

And in answer to your question, mine does, but not everyone's can.
( Labia Majora when you're feeling down, I'll feel you up, Sun 14 Jun 2009, 12:13, Reply)

I'm going to force PJM to read your answer
and then ask him what the question was....I haven't tortured him yet today so this will be a nice gentle way to start.
( chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Sun 14 Jun 2009, 12:15, Reply)

We know of at least one person
who's doesn't.
( The Light In Giftwrap won't play poker with the Skull Spark Joker, Sun 14 Jun 2009, 12:15, Reply)

I'm slowly beginning to numb to the spakka cock thing now...
Its a shame I didn't go last night, I've heard so much and wish I could have seen you all.

Psychochomp - I'm disappointed to learn that you're not a transgender midget.

Labia - ta very much for my badge, I'm going to use it as a motivational aid for when I'm hitting that wall.
(PJM Does not love Liberace, Sun 14 Jun 2009, 12:23, Reply)

You're welcome fella!

( Labia Majora when you're feeling down, I'll feel you up, Sun 14 Jun 2009, 12:25, Reply)

Lab,
I want a badge now! Can I have one please? pretty please?
/sads
(Poppet Nothing like an almighty urgency-fuck!, Sun 14 Jun 2009, 12:30, Reply)

No

( Captain V, Sun 14 Jun 2009, 12:31, Reply)

your name isn't Lab, V
and I was always nice to you.
I'm gutted and hurt by this turn of events.
(Poppet Nothing like an almighty urgency-fuck!, Sun 14 Jun 2009, 12:33, Reply)

I'm speaking on his behalf
Or something. I duno. I'm just gutted for losing my sunglasses :p
( Captain V, Sun 14 Jun 2009, 12:34, Reply)

back off, bitch!
I saw him first!
( crackhouseceilidhband I'd sell your heart to the junkman baby for a buck, Sun 14 Jun 2009, 12:45, Reply)

You did more than just see him first

( althechristmasgeordie swooping in there like a randy eagle., Sun 14 Jun 2009, 12:46, Reply)

You can see with your hands, right?

(Potty Jag har smör i min rumpspringa, Sun 14 Jun 2009, 12:47, Reply)

Not when they're in dark places
or orifices.
( althechristmasgeordie swooping in there like a randy eagle., Sun 14 Jun 2009, 12:48, Reply)

yes.
I'm the Helen Keller of sex.
( crackhouseceilidhband I'd sell your heart to the junkman baby for a buck, Sun 14 Jun 2009, 12:50, Reply)

MMMMMUUUUUUAAAAAHHHHH BBBRRRAUUUUUUUUUUUU
MMMMMAAAAAUUUUUUUUUU
( althechristmasgeordie swooping in there like a randy eagle., Sun 14 Jun 2009, 12:55, Reply)

Help me Al
Save me!
( Captain V, Sun 14 Jun 2009, 12:48, Reply)

You convinced her not to stay at mine
she's your problem now.

*washes hands of the situation*
( althechristmasgeordie swooping in there like a randy eagle., Sun 14 Jun 2009, 12:49, Reply)

No amount of washing can fix this problem

( Captain V, Sun 14 Jun 2009, 12:51, Reply)

Is she trying to move in then?

( althechristmasgeordie swooping in there like a randy eagle., Sun 14 Jun 2009, 12:52, Reply)

You could say that
If in fact you mean move into my arse with a giant purple strap on.
( Captain V, Sun 14 Jun 2009, 12:56, Reply)

You can take one for the team
your prostate will thank you
( Mary's sexbox explosion makes me The Jesus, Sun 14 Jun 2009, 12:57, Reply)

He should learn to enjoy it
It's a lovely feeling.
(Potty Jag har smör i min rumpspringa, Sun 14 Jun 2009, 13:08, Reply)

move in?
I don't fucking know where I am!
( crackhouseceilidhband I'd sell your heart to the junkman baby for a buck, Sun 14 Jun 2009, 13:01, Reply)

That's right
I'm that good.*

*May contain traces of lie
( Captain V, Sun 14 Jun 2009, 13:04, Reply)

when you produced the blindfold
I got my hopes up. Shame you only used it so I couldn't trace the journey back to yours.
( crackhouseceilidhband I'd sell your heart to the junkman baby for a buck, Sun 14 Jun 2009, 13:08, Reply)

I'm sure I saw somelaces in his back pocket
Are you sure that's all he used?
(Potty Jag har smör i min rumpspringa, Sun 14 Jun 2009, 13:10, Reply)

it's not a good stag party
unless someone ends up in handcuffs
( crackhouseceilidhband I'd sell your heart to the junkman baby for a buck, Sun 14 Jun 2009, 13:18, Reply)

it's okay,
I'm happily taken. I meant me and V nice to each other is all.
(Poppet Nothing like an almighty urgency-fuck!, Sun 14 Jun 2009, 12:59, Reply)

^ One word answer of the week win

(PJM Does not love Liberace, Sun 14 Jun 2009, 12:41, Reply)

How are the clementines?

( althechristmasgeordie swooping in there like a randy eagle., Sun 14 Jun 2009, 12:44, Reply)

Explosive

(PJM Does not love Liberace, Sun 14 Jun 2009, 12:46, Reply)

Is it like your bottom doing that pre cum thing?

( althechristmasgeordie swooping in there like a randy eagle., Sun 14 Jun 2009, 12:48, Reply)

No, it just looks like the Japanese flag
Or the back of the Batmobile
(PJM Does not love Liberace, Sun 14 Jun 2009, 12:50, Reply)

Brilliant

( althechristmasgeordie swooping in there like a randy eagle., Sun 14 Jun 2009, 12:54, Reply)

Not for me :-(
*parp*
(PJM Does not love Liberace, Sun 14 Jun 2009, 12:55, Reply)

ah, mocking the misery of others -
the Laughing Cavalier laughs again! Mwahahaha.
( crackhouseceilidhband I'd sell your heart to the junkman baby for a buck, Sun 14 Jun 2009, 12:48, Reply)

Today the Laughing Cavalier
holds his head in his hands and groans "oh dear god why did I drink a bottle of wine at next doors party"
( althechristmasgeordie swooping in there like a randy eagle., Sun 14 Jun 2009, 12:50, Reply)

Red or white?
More like the "Borderline MOT failure Cavalier" judging by the sounds of things.
(PJM Does not love Liberace, Sun 14 Jun 2009, 12:51, Reply)

Red
It seemed like a good idea at the time. But when I woke up this morning with the lights still on and a sick bowl next to the bed it didn't seem so clever.
( althechristmasgeordie swooping in there like a randy eagle., Sun 14 Jun 2009, 12:53, Reply)

Red wine
Is devil juice.

Were you pissed before the bash then? I hear you were heckling some poor dancing midget last night too.
(PJM Does not love Liberace, Sun 14 Jun 2009, 12:54, Reply)

She wasn't a midget!
She was just a short girl.

I stayed sober before the bash, but my next door neighbour was having a party so I dropped in when I got home.
( althechristmasgeordie swooping in there like a randy eagle., Sun 14 Jun 2009, 12:56, Reply)

I'm told she was an arse-flashing kosher midget
Oy!
(PJM Does not love Liberace, Sun 14 Jun 2009, 13:07, Reply)

That's not a nice way to describe V

( Mary's sexbox explosion makes me The Jesus, Sun 14 Jun 2009, 12:56, Reply)

Strokes Al.
NOT THERE
( Mary's sexbox explosion makes me The Jesus, Sun 14 Jun 2009, 12:55, Reply)

Everyone had to perform a task to earn a badge
so you'll have to do something that curries favour with Lab to win one. I didn't have to as I'm all of the win.
( Mary's sexbox explosion makes me The Jesus, Sun 14 Jun 2009, 12:49, Reply)

I got to kick Captain V in the balls
*happies*
( althechristmasgeordie swooping in there like a randy eagle., Sun 14 Jun 2009, 12:51, Reply)

Shame I couldn't go last night
I was looking forward to meeting you Becky.
(PJM Does not love Liberace, Sun 14 Jun 2009, 12:51, Reply)

I wanted to meet you too
but loved the fact that within a minute of meeting your lovely lady, she told me all about your runny bum. I love internet people :)
( Mary's sexbox explosion makes me The Jesus, Sun 14 Jun 2009, 12:56, Reply)

Humph
She was under explicit orders to tell everyone I was suffering from something else. Anything else.

Dignity? Arse.
(PJM Does not love Liberace, Sun 14 Jun 2009, 12:58, Reply)

/chuckles,
nice pun pjm.
(Poppet Nothing like an almighty urgency-fuck!, Sun 14 Jun 2009, 12:59, Reply)

This is b3ta
Dignity need not apply.

Or clemantines, for that matter.
(Potty Jag har smör i min rumpspringa, Sun 14 Jun 2009, 13:06, Reply)

Look, it wasn't the squits!
I injured myself in a sick and awesome biking related accident alright?

I landed on two bags of clementines...
(PJM Does not love Liberace, Sun 14 Jun 2009, 13:09, Reply)

I had to tell Sam how to pronounce scone
Unfortunately it's kind of hard to express the pronunciations in text.
( Captain V, Sun 14 Jun 2009, 12:53, Reply)

Sounds like Stone or cone
rather than gone.
( althechristmasgeordie swooping in there like a randy eagle., Sun 14 Jun 2009, 12:53, Reply)

^this

( Mary's sexbox explosion makes me The Jesus, Sun 14 Jun 2009, 12:55, Reply)

WRONG!
It sounds like gone, you uncouth filth!
(Potty Jag har smör i min rumpspringa, Sun 14 Jun 2009, 12:56, Reply)

Actually I think your right
I had convinced myself it sounded like cone last night, but in the cold light of day I think the gone pronunciation is better.
( althechristmasgeordie swooping in there like a randy eagle., Sun 14 Jun 2009, 12:58, Reply)

That makes sense
Mind is a little addled this morning.
( Captain V, Sun 14 Jun 2009, 12:57, Reply)

My God
What did she do to you?

*fears*
(PJM Does not love Liberace, Sun 14 Jun 2009, 13:03, Reply)

*dribbles*

( Captain V, Sun 14 Jun 2009, 13:04, Reply)

Past tence: Gone
Pressent and Future Tense: Scorn.
( Dance, Gonz, where ever you may be, for you are the lord of the dance settee. Disclaimer: I'm joking, soz for potential offence., Sun 14 Jun 2009, 13:51, Reply)

It was lovely to meet you
And most of the people that came along!
( Rocking Around the SexFace Tree Marley and Marley...WOOOOOO, Sun 14 Jun 2009, 12:17, Reply)

Attempting to upload photo's.
Flickr is being an arse though and doesn't want to know.
(Potty Jag har smör i min rumpspringa, Sun 14 Jun 2009, 13:06, Reply)

Flickr can be a bit of a cunt.
Are you using the uploadr? If not rar them and send them my way and I'll pop them up for you :)
( Maladicta happy Christmas yer arse, I pray God it's our last, Sun 14 Jun 2009, 13:42, Reply)

All up there now!

(Potty Jag har smör i min rumpspringa, Sun 14 Jun 2009, 13:53, Reply)

Woo yay!
*falls over the internets to get to flickr*
( Maladicta happy Christmas yer arse, I pray God it's our last, Sun 14 Jun 2009, 13:59, Reply)

Link please
Or add them to the pool.

Especially if there are embarrassing photos of CHCB.
( Captain V, Sun 14 Jun 2009, 14:04, Reply)

I remain gutted that I wasn't able to make it.
*anticipates photos so she can live vicariously through you all*
( Maladicta happy Christmas yer arse, I pray God it's our last, Sun 14 Jun 2009, 13:45, Reply)

Fucksox.
I should hang out on the OffTopic board more. :(
( Humpty Dumpty was Pushed turned your mother down, Mon 15 Jun 2009, 14:54, Reply)

You should.
You'd fit right in, fnarr fnarr.
( crackhouseceilidhband I'd sell your heart to the junkman baby for a buck, Mon 15 Jun 2009, 15:20, Reply)