Can we all please accept that
whatever "hilarious" michael jackson joke you're about to post is

a) actually not that funny
and
b) has probably been posted before either on here on or one of the other boards.

He's dead, he was a nonce, he was a great musician, it's kind of sad as he was a really fucked up person, but he was still a nonce so it's not that sad.

Now lets talk about something funny.
( althechristmasgeordie swooping in there like a randy eagle., Fri 26 Jun 2009, 9:12, Reply)

yeaah well
I only just woke the fuck up....Its all new to me bitch.
(never-right -getting it wrong since '78, Fri 26 Jun 2009, 9:13, Reply)

ym

( Mary's sexbox explosion makes me The Jesus, Fri 26 Jun 2009, 9:14, Reply)

damn, beat me to it

( Labia Majora when you're feeling down, I'll feel you up, Fri 26 Jun 2009, 9:14, Reply)

becky beats everyone to my mum
she can't get enough.
( althechristmasgeordie swooping in there like a randy eagle., Fri 26 Jun 2009, 9:15, Reply)

Like the cat that got the cream.

( Dance, Gonz, where ever you may be, for you are the lord of the dance settee. Disclaimer: I'm joking, soz for potential offence., Fri 26 Jun 2009, 9:15, Reply)

damn straight

( Mary's sexbox explosion makes me The Jesus, Fri 26 Jun 2009, 9:16, Reply)

cat crack whore

cream old lady
( althechristmasgeordie swooping in there like a randy eagle., Fri 26 Jun 2009, 9:17, Reply)

My cat died last night
that's more important and NOBODY GIVES A FUCK!!!!!!!!11111!!!!
(oneinthepink is at your cervix m'lady, Fri 26 Jun 2009, 9:15, Reply)

well then bitch and moan about it until someone does give a fuck

( Mary's sexbox explosion makes me The Jesus, Fri 26 Jun 2009, 9:16, Reply)

That's sad
did your cat record the one of the biggest selling albums of all time?
( althechristmasgeordie swooping in there like a randy eagle., Fri 26 Jun 2009, 9:16, Reply)

You're gonna look real stupid
If it did.
( Cawl - King Of Wales, Fri 26 Jun 2009, 9:21, Reply)

Oh shit, is it keyboard cat?

( Mary's sexbox explosion makes me The Jesus, Fri 26 Jun 2009, 9:22, Reply)

I don't even own a cat
do I have to explain this was a piss take?
(oneinthepink is at your cervix m'lady, Fri 26 Jun 2009, 9:41, Reply)

You know how people feel about cats on this board
why would you joke about something like that.

You sick fuck.
( althechristmasgeordie swooping in there like a randy eagle., Fri 26 Jun 2009, 9:43, Reply)

Clearly yes. How the fuck would we know that
lying about your cat dying on this day of great bereavement is uncalled for and wrong. I hope you feel ashamed of your actions. CUNT
( Mary's sexbox explosion makes me The Jesus, Fri 26 Jun 2009, 9:44, Reply)

It was sick
so I had to put a shovel to it.
(oneinthepink is at your cervix m'lady, Fri 26 Jun 2009, 9:53, Reply)

I NEARLY DIED LAST NIGHT.
There was a fire engine and everything.
Guess it wasn't my time.
Take that, MJ.
( Cawl - King Of Wales, Fri 26 Jun 2009, 9:17, Reply)

Did you get stuck in a tree?

( althechristmasgeordie swooping in there like a randy eagle., Fri 26 Jun 2009, 9:17, Reply)

No.
My brother's car caught fire, the handbrake cable melted, and the whole thing rolled into my house.
( Cawl - King Of Wales, Fri 26 Jun 2009, 9:19, Reply)

Christ, that actually sounds a bit serious
is there much damage?
( Mary's sexbox explosion makes me The Jesus, Fri 26 Jun 2009, 9:21, Reply)

Nope,
We were really lucky.
When it hit the house my sister woke up, called the fire brigade and woke everyone up.
( Cawl - King Of Wales, Fri 26 Jun 2009, 9:22, Reply)

Always
some drama with you isn't it
( I saw Al kissing Santa Claus before doing it reindeer style under the tree, Fri 26 Jun 2009, 9:24, Reply)

Yeah.
My life is pure liquid excitement.
( Cawl - King Of Wales, Fri 26 Jun 2009, 9:25, Reply)

Hooray
for your sister and her speeding phone dialling SkillZ.

She could probably emigrate to Australia with them.
( althechristmasgeordie swooping in there like a randy eagle., Fri 26 Jun 2009, 9:24, Reply)

Well, she woke me up screaming
"Kaol, THE HOUSE IS ON FIRE!".

I apparently said "OK" and went back to sleep.
( Cawl - King Of Wales, Fri 26 Jun 2009, 9:24, Reply)

Fair Play
unless she's holding a cup of fresh coffee there's no need to go rousing people so early.
( althechristmasgeordie swooping in there like a randy eagle., Fri 26 Jun 2009, 9:25, Reply)

Exactly.
They're all outside throwing water on the thing, and I'm sleeping away.

The fire brigade couldn't find my house. Reassuring, that.
They drove past my lane, and my brother had to go chase them down. In the other car. Took him two miles.
( Cawl - King Of Wales, Fri 26 Jun 2009, 9:28, Reply)

DId they miss the fuck of big burny thing?
or did they assume that must have been some other fire?
( althechristmasgeordie swooping in there like a randy eagle., Fri 26 Jun 2009, 9:29, Reply)

I don't live on the main road.
No way you'd be able to see it from there.
It's more like:
Leave the main road. Drive a mile on small country road.
Turn up smaller country road.
Turn into small cluster of houses that are clearly signposted.

Problem is that mobiles and sat-nav don't work where I live.
I don't know why.
( Cawl - King Of Wales, Fri 26 Jun 2009, 9:31, Reply)

Are you sure it's nothing to do with your tinfoil headgear?

( althechristmasgeordie swooping in there like a randy eagle., Fri 26 Jun 2009, 9:32, Reply)

...
They can't see me if I type really small.
( Cawl - King Of Wales, Fri 26 Jun 2009, 9:34, Reply)

We can all see you
you big freaky tall giant man
( I saw Al kissing Santa Claus before doing it reindeer style under the tree, Fri 26 Jun 2009, 9:34, Reply)

Disco inferno

( Mary's sexbox explosion makes me The Jesus, Fri 26 Jun 2009, 9:19, Reply)

Win!

( Papa Noel is looking forward to filling your stockings, Fri 26 Jun 2009, 9:23, Reply)

I reset my phone last night
because it was playing up and after I had done it remembered that I have also wiped my computer since backing up all my contacts. Yup I am that stupid.

Must have another copy of them somewhere
( I saw Al kissing Santa Claus before doing it reindeer style under the tree, Fri 26 Jun 2009, 9:18, Reply)

That's why you didn't text me goodnight?
:(
( Cawl - King Of Wales, Fri 26 Jun 2009, 9:19, Reply)

Don't bother with her Kaol
she's evil
( althechristmasgeordie swooping in there like a randy eagle., Fri 26 Jun 2009, 9:20, Reply)

She.... .....
She said she loved me :(
( Cawl - King Of Wales, Fri 26 Jun 2009, 9:21, Reply)

*sadface*

( I saw Al kissing Santa Claus before doing it reindeer style under the tree, Fri 26 Jun 2009, 9:22, Reply)

Apparently
you and Gonz owe me an apology.
( althechristmasgeordie swooping in there like a randy eagle., Fri 26 Jun 2009, 9:24, Reply)

I'm sorry
you're an unfunny cunt who needs such internet validation
( I saw Al kissing Santa Claus before doing it reindeer style under the tree, Fri 26 Jun 2009, 9:32, Reply)

Give him a minute, he'll get a picture of himself up on here in his pants
NOT VECTORED
( Mary's sexbox explosion makes me The Jesus, Fri 26 Jun 2009, 9:35, Reply)

Here you go
check THIS out
( althechristmasgeordie swooping in there like a randy eagle., Fri 26 Jun 2009, 9:37, Reply)

Just as I suspected
you are a life size Ken doll
( Mary's sexbox explosion makes me The Jesus, Fri 26 Jun 2009, 9:47, Reply)

Do Not Want
again
( Labia Majora when you're feeling down, I'll feel you up, Fri 26 Jun 2009, 9:38, Reply)