So Gordon Brown can't spell?
Big fucking news! In other news I burned my hand on a hot cup of tea. You think the Sun would print that?

Yesterday I had some fantastic sex. Whether thats a QOTW lie or by some crazy twist of fate actually true, tell me what you did to waste away your Sunday.
( PhillieJoe ho ho Merry Xmas Being clever is not as clever as being, Mon 9 Nov 2009, 9:09, Reply)

I went swimming and totally got a new cossie
it's blue and shimmery and sparkly, I look like a total mermaid
( Monkeysex You can't box zombies, you fool, Mon 9 Nov 2009, 9:13, Reply)

I suspect it's more along the lines of
Gordon Brown has slightly scrawly handwriting, and a Sun reader can't... er... read.

Remember that the Sun is aimed slightly below the UK average reading-age. And the UK average reading age is 12; and almost a quarter of adults have a level of literacy at or below that expected of an 11-year-old.

EDIT: But I did not have any sex, fantastic or otherwise. Meh.
( Enzyme is in ur [noun]z, [verb]in' ur [noun]z, Mon 9 Nov 2009, 9:21, Reply)

I'm CONDFOOSED
The average reading age is 12, yet most adults have the reading ability of an 11 year old?
( Monkeysex You can't box zombies, you fool, Mon 9 Nov 2009, 9:24, Reply)

No - almost a quarter.
And even if it was most, as long as there were some with a STUPENDOUS reading-age, that'd drag up the average.
( Enzyme is in ur [noun]z, [verb]in' ur [noun]z, Mon 9 Nov 2009, 9:29, Reply)

No
that would drag up the mean. The term average is fairly meaningless unless you define how you calculate it. It's this confusion that lets papers make bold statements, such as about house prices, which although correct, are not applicable to what most people would think it means.
( althechristmasgeordie swooping in there like a randy eagle., Mon 9 Nov 2009, 9:32, Reply)

if you start saying root mean square
people are going to get confused
( Festivipros Breed crows, and you have lots of crows, Mon 9 Nov 2009, 9:34, Reply)

Root mean square!
*runs away in the confusion*
( althechristmasgeordie swooping in there like a randy eagle., Mon 9 Nov 2009, 9:34, Reply)

Fair enough.
I don't know what's the most depressing interpretation of "average" here: neither the mean, median nor mode is exactly inspiring.
( Enzyme is in ur [noun]z, [verb]in' ur [noun]z, Mon 9 Nov 2009, 9:47, Reply)

OI BERT!
I'm ready and waiting where's my pictures of the mens bogs!
( PhillieJoe ho ho Merry Xmas Being clever is not as clever as being, Mon 9 Nov 2009, 9:51, Reply)

Ah, shit
I'll pop home at lunch to get my phone's USB lead, take pictures of the Men's room, and turn you on like a big gayer
( Monkeysex You can't box zombies, you fool, Mon 9 Nov 2009, 10:00, Reply)

WOOYAY!
*faps*
( PhillieJoe ho ho Merry Xmas Being clever is not as clever as being, Mon 9 Nov 2009, 10:10, Reply)

I went to the beach.
And I soaked up the sun without getting burnt. And had a lovely time with my best friend, who I'm going to miss greatly when she moves away in two months time. And I also studied my arse off in between going to the beach and having a good time with my mate.
(Poppet Nothing like an almighty urgency-fuck!, Mon 9 Nov 2009, 9:54, Reply)

Are you ignoring me?
Are you ignoring me?
Are you ignoring me?
( althechristmasgeordie swooping in there like a randy eagle., Mon 9 Nov 2009, 9:55, Reply)

Are you ignoring me too?

(althegeordie kissed a dog and he liked it., Mon 9 Nov 2009, 10:01, Reply)

I'm ignoring you

( Monkeysex You can't box zombies, you fool, Mon 9 Nov 2009, 10:09, Reply)

fuck off aussie,
I don't want to here about your "weather" or your "beaches" It's november and shit here.
(Psyc-Ho-Ho-Ho-Chomp **bearer of the waki crown**, Mon 9 Nov 2009, 10:01, Reply)

It's fucking awesome down under
as long as you have Mad SkillZ
(althegeordie kissed a dog and he liked it., Mon 9 Nov 2009, 10:03, Reply)

I love you too Chompy.
If it makes you feel better - we've had hail and rain and crap weather for the last 5 months. I missed the sun.
(Poppet Nothing like an almighty urgency-fuck!, Mon 9 Nov 2009, 10:03, Reply)

Cheer up, Captain Happy
Someday you'll find somebody capable of loving you
( Monkeysex You can't box zombies, you fool, Mon 9 Nov 2009, 10:04, Reply)

Bert
can you tell Poppet that her continual ignoring of me is starting to make me upset.
( althechristmasgeordie swooping in there like a randy eagle., Mon 9 Nov 2009, 10:09, Reply)

Not until you change your sig
you HORRIBLE OLD MEAN BULLYMAN
( Monkeysex You can't box zombies, you fool, Mon 9 Nov 2009, 10:09, Reply)

Done it
now make her listen to me. I just want to get a message through.
( althechristmasgeordie swooping in there like a randy eagle., Mon 9 Nov 2009, 10:10, Reply)

Nah
I'm not getting involved, if you want to talk to her get a meatpuppet and bully her that way, you bully
( Monkeysex You can't box zombies, you fool, Mon 9 Nov 2009, 10:15, Reply)

They usally have a boyfriend though

(Psyc-Ho-Ho-Ho-Chomp **bearer of the waki crown**, Mon 9 Nov 2009, 10:17, Reply)

a boyfriend standards
( Monkeysex You can't box zombies, you fool, Mon 9 Nov 2009, 10:19, Reply)

Don't be silly women don't have standards.

(Psyc-Ho-Ho-Ho-Chomp **bearer of the waki crown**, Mon 9 Nov 2009, 10:26, Reply)

then why are you single?
BAM!
( Festivipros Breed crows, and you have lots of crows, Mon 9 Nov 2009, 10:27, Reply)

Looks-wise you're ok but you need to work on your personality.
Women like guys with personalities.
( big-girl's-baubles is tired of fighting the inevitable, Mon 9 Nov 2009, 10:29, Reply)

Meow!
Look at them claws!
( althechristmasgeordie swooping in there like a randy eagle., Mon 9 Nov 2009, 10:30, Reply)

thanks for the advice captain relationships

(Psyc-Ho-Ho-Ho-Chomp **bearer of the waki crown**, Mon 9 Nov 2009, 10:31, Reply)

Yes but I have the opposite problem.

( big-girl's-baubles is tired of fighting the inevitable, Mon 9 Nov 2009, 10:33, Reply)

When are you two gonna get together

( althechristmasgeordie swooping in there like a randy eagle., Mon 9 Nov 2009, 10:33, Reply)

there's not enough beer in the world.

(Psyc-Ho-Ho-Ho-Chomp **bearer of the waki crown**, Mon 9 Nov 2009, 10:37, Reply)

*sad face*

( big-girl's-baubles is tired of fighting the inevitable, Mon 9 Nov 2009, 10:38, Reply)

He means for you

( The Light In Giftwrap won't play poker with the Skull Spark Joker, Mon 9 Nov 2009, 11:11, Reply)

: )

( big-girl's-baubles is tired of fighting the inevitable, Mon 9 Nov 2009, 11:21, Reply)

Nonsense.
It's sunny and frosty up in Manchester today - altogether quite magnificent.
( Enzyme is in ur [noun]z, [verb]in' ur [noun]z, Mon 9 Nov 2009, 10:10, Reply)

It's just grey and misty
down in that there London.
( althechristmasgeordie swooping in there like a randy eagle., Mon 9 Nov 2009, 10:11, Reply)

Once again
the t'North is better than the t'South.
( Enzyme is in ur [noun]z, [verb]in' ur [noun]z, Mon 9 Nov 2009, 10:13, Reply)

this is only true
if, like me, you don't include the South West as part of the South.

because we all know the South West is best. (must be true, it rhymes)
( Festivipros Breed crows, and you have lots of crows, Mon 9 Nov 2009, 10:18, Reply)

Are you kidding me?
Truro's a shithole
( Monkeysex You can't box zombies, you fool, Mon 9 Nov 2009, 10:18, Reply)

all largish urban areas in Cornwall are shit
Truro is least offensive of them.

You don't go to the South West for the cities though.
( Festivipros Breed crows, and you have lots of crows, Mon 9 Nov 2009, 10:29, Reply)

Truro is a shithole.
But its more than made up for by the lovely places in Cornwall.
( PhillieJoe ho ho Merry Xmas Being clever is not as clever as being, Mon 9 Nov 2009, 10:29, Reply)

It's so fucking DAMP in Manchester.
I forgot how much moisture there is in the air.
( Lampito asleep in the poppies, Mon 9 Nov 2009, 10:22, Reply)

the air my sweaty pants
( Monkeysex You can't box zombies, you fool, Mon 9 Nov 2009, 10:25, Reply)

sweaty pants vagina.
( althechristmasgeordie swooping in there like a randy eagle., Mon 9 Nov 2009, 10:26, Reply)

Wouldn't you like to know.

( Lampito asleep in the poppies, Mon 9 Nov 2009, 10:34, Reply)

Oh wait

( Lampito asleep in the poppies, Mon 9 Nov 2009, 10:34, Reply)

It's the internet, I can say whatever I like cause it's COMPLETELY ANONYMOUS

( Lampito asleep in the poppies, Mon 9 Nov 2009, 10:34, Reply)

Apart from the fact
that we both know each others names.
( althechristmasgeordie swooping in there like a randy eagle., Mon 9 Nov 2009, 10:36, Reply)

It was sarcasm :)
Yeah, but what's my first name? :P

(people who met me won't have a problem with this)
( Lampito asleep in the poppies, Mon 9 Nov 2009, 10:38, Reply)

Please, miss!
I know!
( Enzyme is in ur [noun]z, [verb]in' ur [noun]z, Mon 9 Nov 2009, 10:40, Reply)

Is it Rumplestiltskin?

( althechristmasgeordie swooping in there like a randy eagle., Mon 9 Nov 2009, 10:42, Reply)

Yes, I know you do :P
You're SPECIAL.
( Lampito asleep in the poppies, Mon 9 Nov 2009, 10:43, Reply)

He get's his own bus and everything

( althechristmasgeordie swooping in there like a randy eagle., Mon 9 Nov 2009, 10:44, Reply)

You have a lovely name.
It rolls off the tongue.
( big-girl's-baubles is tired of fighting the inevitable, Mon 9 Nov 2009, 10:42, Reply)

Makes it fucking easy to find me on Facebook though :)

( Lampito asleep in the poppies, Mon 9 Nov 2009, 10:44, Reply)

Is it Flip-flap-bibbity-bob?

( althechristmasgeordie swooping in there like a randy eagle., Mon 9 Nov 2009, 10:45, Reply)

Close, but no cigar

( Lampito asleep in the poppies, Mon 9 Nov 2009, 10:47, Reply)

Is it billy-bolly-penis-pop?

( althechristmasgeordie swooping in there like a randy eagle., Mon 9 Nov 2009, 10:48, Reply)

Shut up, Alastair :P
I always thought that was your name
( Lampito asleep in the poppies, Mon 9 Nov 2009, 10:51, Reply)

It's Alan
Or Nigel, depending on who I'm talking to.
( althechristmasgeordie swooping in there like a randy eagle., Mon 9 Nov 2009, 10:51, Reply)

My name changes on who I talk to.
I did try to use uniname at the bash, got drunk, forgot, everyone knows me by my real name, which is confusing (due to it being common as hell and I hate it though it suits most people)
( Lampito asleep in the poppies, Mon 9 Nov 2009, 10:55, Reply)

Sounds lovely Enzyme.
I love days like that. :)
(Poppet Nothing like an almighty urgency-fuck!, Mon 9 Nov 2009, 10:14, Reply)

Ahh, the sun
What is that great and mysterious object? It is only spoken in myth up here.

Up here being Linkoping, where the sun is only popping out for a couple of hours every day and it's bloody snowing the rest of the time.
(Potty Jag har smör i min rumpspringa, Mon 9 Nov 2009, 10:25, Reply)

Heey!
Long time no speak - how're you going?
(Poppet Nothing like an almighty urgency-fuck!, Mon 9 Nov 2009, 10:27, Reply)

Recovering from a stonking cold
Have life sorted out somewhat. Nothing major happening though, which is just the way I like it!

Hows things in the hot place?
(Potty Jag har smör i min rumpspringa, Mon 9 Nov 2009, 10:34, Reply)

Hot. Busy.
can't say much more to it then that really!
(Poppet Nothing like an almighty urgency-fuck!, Mon 9 Nov 2009, 10:40, Reply)

Hot and busy is never a good combination
Hot - go and lie in bed until it cools down
Cold - go and lie in bed until it warm up.

Either way, busy shouldn't come in to it.
(Potty Jag har smör i min rumpspringa, Mon 9 Nov 2009, 10:45, Reply)

*googles*
Ahhhh... Sweden.
( Enzyme is in ur [noun]z, [verb]in' ur [noun]z, Mon 9 Nov 2009, 10:35, Reply)

Aye
Or, as I have recently taken to saying...

Jag har smör i min rumpspringa
(Potty Jag har smör i min rumpspringa, Mon 9 Nov 2009, 10:39, Reply)

I have snow in my springbok?

( Enzyme is in ur [noun]z, [verb]in' ur [noun]z, Mon 9 Nov 2009, 10:41, Reply)

Officelol.

( big-girl's-baubles is tired of fighting the inevitable, Mon 9 Nov 2009, 10:43, Reply)

Nearly
I have butter in my arsecrack. Makes breaking the ice as "the crazy englishman" at parties much easier.
(Potty Jag har smör i min rumpspringa, Mon 9 Nov 2009, 10:44, Reply)

Oh yeah this weekend I went and had a look at my old Deviantart page
back from when I was angsty and shit. I have one pic that's been favourited a few times a week since I put it on and is now up to about 600 favs even though I committed the most horrible crime of Lens Flare! Out of curiosity I googled it and found that its been used several gazzilion times on angsty teenagers myspace pages. I feel like commenting on everyone just how shit the picture is. I am a filthy emo icon and must cut myself and cry.
( PhillieJoe ho ho Merry Xmas Being clever is not as clever as being, Mon 9 Nov 2009, 10:21, Reply)

Picture
or it didn't happen.
( Lampito asleep in the poppies, Mon 9 Nov 2009, 10:23, Reply)

Im really really sorry.
www.b3ta.com/board/7613968
( PhillieJoe ho ho Merry Xmas Being clever is not as clever as being, Mon 9 Nov 2009, 10:31, Reply)

Haha!

( big-girl's-baubles is tired of fighting the inevitable, Mon 9 Nov 2009, 10:37, Reply)

oh my god,
that's so shit.
(Psyc-Ho-Ho-Ho-Chomp **bearer of the waki crown**, Mon 9 Nov 2009, 10:39, Reply)

I KNOW!
So why do the emo's love it so!?!
( PhillieJoe ho ho Merry Xmas Being clever is not as clever as being, Mon 9 Nov 2009, 10:54, Reply)

you're doing shit poetry now.

(Psyc-Ho-Ho-Ho-Chomp **bearer of the waki crown**, Mon 9 Nov 2009, 10:58, Reply)

FUCK!
I didn't realise.
( PhillieJoe ho ho Merry Xmas Being clever is not as clever as being, Mon 9 Nov 2009, 11:14, Reply)

hahaha
that is so awful.
( Festivipros Breed crows, and you have lots of crows, Mon 9 Nov 2009, 11:51, Reply)

Hold there good sir!
For emo's are easily swindled out of much cash if you can make your picture the absolute "in" thing. I sense you could make many beer tokens from this.
(Potty Jag har smör i min rumpspringa, Mon 9 Nov 2009, 10:27, Reply)

I'm not taking filthy emo moneys
I'd rather take drug money.
( PhillieJoe ho ho Merry Xmas Being clever is not as clever as being, Mon 9 Nov 2009, 10:30, Reply)