Shitty Presents
My dad's birthday was coming up (I was about 8 at the time) and I thought it would be funny to play a joke on him. So I got a shoebox, wrapped it up perfectly and gave it to him on his birthday.

He was quite excited about his birthday, but his face fell as he open my present to find a box with nothing in it.

I thought it was hilarious.





What a mean bitch I am.
(quis, Thu 30 Sep 2004, 3:06, Reply)

Not me but Mrs Kennykenken...
...has an amusingly mad grandmother who's knack of buying presents never ceases to amaze me.

1. My Wife's 21st birthday - a microwave pasta cooker from Poundland. (She didn't have a microwave)

2. My Brother-in-law's 16th birthday - a plastic photo cube from Poundland.
( mns 2️⃣2️⃣9️⃣0️⃣7️⃣, Wed 29 Sep 2004, 23:48, Reply)

Gave a mate
a smack in the face, cunt.
(lifelikeandposeable, Wed 29 Sep 2004, 22:40, Reply)

Turn the Terrible Tank
My grandmother bought me the 'Turn the Terrible Tank' game when I was twenty one. She had no clue as to my age. This was supported one day when I drove my parents to visit her and she was shocked to find 14 year olds were now allowed to drive. I was 23 at the time.
(Taff135, Wed 29 Sep 2004, 17:20, Reply)

My Nan
...used to regularly give my Dad a bottle of after shave for Christmas.

My Dad has had a beard since long before I was born, and I'm nearly 40.
( Amish Information Systems hates misplaced, commas, Wed 29 Sep 2004, 13:42, Reply)

I was 14 years old, it was
Christmas morning and we all had unwrapped our presents and all seem fairly satisfied, though I felt a little dismayed as I was hoping for a bike which I had desired for many years. Then my father says, "Follow me, I got something to show you..."

So off we went towards the garage, and he pulls back the door, and what's sitting there? An old bike from the 40's, a monsterous attrocity made from what seemed like cast iron and my heart sank and ripped in two. While I looked at this hideous contraption, my dad says, "It's my bike, Mum got it for me..."

At this point I wanted to hug him and cry (I was so happy) and uttered, "Thank God, I thought you were gonna give that piece of crap to me"

My dad was stunned... he held onto that thing for about two weeks when my mum finally confided in me telling me it was intended for me. I was forced to ask if I could borrow his bike from time to time and pretended I had fun riding it. I swear I saw a tear rolling down his grinning face as I strained my legs trying to move what may as well have been a two wheeled tank.
(bunny_333, Wed 29 Sep 2004, 12:46, Reply)