posh bird's house
whilst going out with a very posh lass and having a meet-the-fucking-grandparents sunday lunch at her place...

i felt the call of nature. so i opted for the toilet upstairs (there was a choice, the house was big, piano and the lot)

after doing my business, i had managed to lay a cable so large, it poked out the top

two flushes, no joy and a desperation washed over me, there was no proletariat plaggy bog brush to mash up my monster mess

panicking, i toyed with the idea of mashing it in my hand...no, there must be something...anything to chop up the log of doom

then: a brainwave. i spied the posh towel container: a picnic basket. i snapped out a twig and Zorroed the turd into salami-esque slices. huzzah

after wiping the twig, i pondered how to get rid of it. no need, i just widdled it into the basket

then i went back to the meal, and no i didn't apologise for the length ;-)

sorry Anna!
(Darth Vodka, Sun 30 Mar 2008, 19:07, closed)