I don't like this one, to be honest, but it is sick
A guy meets a girl in a club, and at the end of the night they go back to hers for 'a few drinks'

The guy's getting down to business, when he finds that his lady is very dry and rough down below. He tries to ignore it, but it's really starting to hurt him so he asks her if she can do anything about it. "Sure" she smiles and disappears into the bathhroom.

A few minutes later she reappears, and he gets back to work, finding the environment much better. 'Wow!' he thinks 'this is great!' So he asks her "What did you do to get so wet?"

She looks at him, smiles, and just says "Picked off my scabs and let the pus run out"
( Cap'n Tallbeard contributes nothing, Fri 3 Feb 2006, 0:35, Reply)

how do you know if you're at a gay picnic?
the hotdogs all taste like shit
( sarah sarah sarah, Fri 3 Feb 2006, 0:32, Reply)

Here goes:
British serial killers are offered a last drink before jail.

Guard: "What would you like?"
Harold Shipman: "A nice whiskey would be great"

Guard: "What would you like?"
Myra Hindley: "I'd love some red wine"

Guard: "What would you like?"
Fred West: "I could murder some Tennants"
( Cap'n Tallbeard contributes nothing, Fri 3 Feb 2006, 0:30, Reply)

What do you call a blonde with a runny nose?
Full.
(Freddie the Turnip, Fri 3 Feb 2006, 0:11, Reply)

What's 12 feet long and reeks of piss?
Old people doing the conga.
( Butters remembers when nostalgia used to be good., Thu 2 Feb 2006, 20:34, Reply)

Little boy goes up to his mum.
"Mummy, is God a boy or a girl?"
"Well, son," replies his mother, "I assume he's both."
"Mummy, is God black or white?"
"Well, in a way, he's both."
"Mummy?"
"Yes?"
"Is Michael Jackson God?"
( Butters remembers when nostalgia used to be good., Thu 2 Feb 2006, 20:17, Reply)

Whats so wrong about 5 black men in a Cadalic going off a cliff?

A Cadalic seats 6

/coat
(The Horizontal Monster Mash Mr. T Pitties Me, Thu 2 Feb 2006, 19:55, Reply)

jewjokes
how do you call a jewish paratrooper


a shooting star
(Chupie, Thu 2 Feb 2006, 19:34, Reply)

jewjokes
how do you call Hitler with a gas cyclinder on his back?


Jew Buster!
(Chupie, Thu 2 Feb 2006, 19:34, Reply)

Niggaz
How should you wink at a nigger???


Down the barrel of a gun
(richy1984, Thu 2 Feb 2006, 18:38, Reply)

probably said already...
We had a blackout the other week...


So we shot him.
(androoh, Thu 2 Feb 2006, 18:19, Reply)

Flowerpot men
Bill: "flobbly dobble obble oop?"
Ben: "If you liked me that much, you'd swallow it"


sorry if its been said before...
( Kuroi Kyo Heroes of Liang Shan Po, Thu 2 Feb 2006, 16:48, Reply)

Whats blue and orange and sits at the bottom of a swimming pool?
A baby with slashed armbands.

Whats red and orange and floats in a swimming pool?
Armbands with a slashed baby.
( General_Mayhem, Thu 2 Feb 2006, 16:27, Reply)

where does bin laden put his cd's?
IN IRAQ


get it ..!
(ajtango, Thu 2 Feb 2006, 16:25, Reply)

Why do black men hate chainsaws?
why do black men hate chainsaws?


because they go "run"~"nigger"~"nigger"~"nigger"
(ajtango, Thu 2 Feb 2006, 16:23, Reply)

Whats 1 foot tall, 4 foot wide and has dificulties getting through doors?
A baby with a javelin through its head.
( General_Mayhem, Thu 2 Feb 2006, 16:15, Reply)

I made it up myself... can you tell?
Why can't Ray Charles read?

Because he's dead.
(schnuff, Thu 2 Feb 2006, 14:49, Reply)

Racist joke
How do you stop six black guys raping a white girl?
Throw them a basketball.
(greenycrimson I stole the from pyschotherapist, Thu 2 Feb 2006, 13:20, Reply)

Racist jokes- huzzah!
How do you find a black man in a coal mine?
Make him smile.
(greenycrimson I stole the from pyschotherapist, Thu 2 Feb 2006, 13:19, Reply)

needs a re-airing for them what missed it
What do you call a dead man utd fan?

A good start

What do you call two dead man utd fans?

Holly and jessica.
(Cyril has gone out in the thong to feed the pigeons, Thu 2 Feb 2006, 13:17, Reply)

what's worse than being gay?
being gay and liking it
( The Beast can't help looking at womens breasts on the tube, Thu 2 Feb 2006, 12:56, Reply)

what's worse than raping a girl?
finding out she's over 16.
( The Beast can't help looking at womens breasts on the tube, Thu 2 Feb 2006, 12:55, Reply)

what's big and stinks of shit?
Bradford
( The Beast can't help looking at womens breasts on the tube, Thu 2 Feb 2006, 12:52, Reply)

How do you confuse George Bush?
wake him up
( The Beast can't help looking at womens breasts on the tube, Thu 2 Feb 2006, 12:48, Reply)

far east anyone
What diet craze came from asia last year?



Swim fast......
(cripps-zoid The rabbit buffer, Thu 2 Feb 2006, 12:35, Reply)

eeerrr
whats the best thing about fucking twenty eight year olds?


There's twenty of them......hahahahahahaha

Sick fuck.
(cripps-zoid The rabbit buffer, Thu 2 Feb 2006, 12:30, Reply)

love it
whats the difference between a peado and achne?

Achne does not come on your face untill you are 14...............
(cripps-zoid The rabbit buffer, Thu 2 Feb 2006, 12:28, Reply)

Why didn't the cat eat its dinner?
'cos I nailed its head to the fucking floor
_{Never really got the mildly funny side of that one}
(Insane Maniac hates eggs, Thu 2 Feb 2006, 12:28, Reply)