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This is a question DIY Techno-hacks

Old hard drive platters make wonderfully good drinks coasters - they look dead smart and expensive and you've stopped people reading your old data into the bargain.

Have you taped all your remotes together, peep-show-style? Have you wired your doorbell to the toilet? What enterprising DIY have you done with technology?

Extra points for using sellotape rather than solder.

(, Thu 20 Aug 2009, 12:30)
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I Techno-hacked my way onto the front page
but Rob's probably going to be a cock and take me off.
(, Thu 27 Aug 2009, 13:13, Reply)
in ur question
hackin ur end
(, Thu 27 Aug 2009, 13:04, Reply)
Last
Am I?
(, Thu 27 Aug 2009, 13:01, 1 reply)
100% true
I once hacked QoTW so that my answer was a sexual boast.
(, Thu 27 Aug 2009, 12:40, Reply)
Unfortunately, this is all too true.
I spent years trying to shag my housemate (female) on and off. I was utterly, besotted, in love, and she liked me, but never really fancied me. She had exotic, interesting boyfriend's, whose intricate deaths I plotted. I spent many, many nights in my room trying not to hear them shagging. Every few weeks, we'd get drunk and she'd let me frig her but never shag or touch me in any sexual way. She would let me wank whilst lying next to her - thats how bad it was. This went on in a cycle of self loathing and hate really, for years, for both of us.

It only ever, ever happened when drunk. Combining alcohol, a lot of self pity, and the repression of those 'she is only letting me do this out of pity' thoughts had the side effect of generally making little Coke remain little, and coming for me was very difficult, if I could get it up at all. It was, I had long since realised, utterly, utterly pathetic. But I was in love.

One day, the gods were smiling. She was lying in bed, smoking, with a look on her face somewhere between disdain and disgust at me and herself. I had just made her come, with my fingers, and I was idly sucking her nipples as she liked that. I was enjoying feeling a rare hardon, pressed up against her hip.

Are you hard? She asked suddenly. I wore my best shit eating grin. Nothing makes me harder than hearing a girl say that. It says oh so much more.

Do you want to fuck me? she said, between drags, the smoke curling out of her mouth as she stared.

She stubbed out her fag, and rolled over on to her front, and motioned for me to get behind. Oh fucking YES.

Shit. I went soft. Nothing. Nada. I think I was basically terrified. My stomach dropped. Think. I tugged away frantically

"What the fuck are you doing? Just fuck me. This wont happen again."

Only one possible course of action remained open to me. I would have to improvise. I made an excuse to change position and grabbed her one and only dildo which I knew was in her bedside table. I held it between my legs and thrust into her. She groaned. Not surpsingly because it wass shitload bigger than me. She reached under and grabbed my balls and fucked my 'cock' until she came.

Sated, she told me to pull out and finish myself. I pretended to come in the dark. I chucked the dildo under the bed. Eventually i got up and went to 'clean up' in the bathroom. I think I probably cried.

So, basically, I hacked my own erection, and DIY'd.

I am honestly, not that guy anymore!!!
(, Thu 27 Aug 2009, 12:13, 14 replies)

This question is now closed.

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