My Wanking DisastersEver been caught by your mum? Or tried to fuck a pillow and got the spongey bits stuck to your bell-end creating a strange new flower? What about the time you man-milked the keyboard causing your PC to short-circuit and knocking out the mains for the whole street? Maybe you're a lady and you were using your mobile phone as a vibrator and accidentally dialed your mother? Tell us your stories and we'll tell the world.
(
rob You should follow me http://twitter.com/robmanuel, Tue 1 Jun 2004, 17:23)
« Back
Ex-flatmate - we'll call him Keith because that's his namewas very proud of the fact that he regularly masturbated 15 times a day. Moderately disgusting, but not so bad as when he moved out and I took over his old room.
The walls round where his bed had been were covered with long thin yellowing stains where some kind of semi-viscous liquid had apparently been repeatedly splashed, and then allowed to run down the wall to congeal on the skirting board. I was left scrubbing off his man-gunk for two days. It goes somewhat flaky when it's been left a while.
I'd just like to point out that, yes, Keith was a rather unpleasant person. Him going psychotic and leaving was a major relief, even with the spunk-scrubbing that ensued.
(
TV's Nosemonkey, Wed 2 Jun 2004, 10:48,
closed)
« Back