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Settle an argument
We live next door to an old people's home, and they have left a seemingly pristine bright yellow leather armchair outside.

Should my boyfriend:

a) Drag the chair up to our flat under the cover of darkness and disinfect it in our living room

b) Go to the old people's home tomorrow and ask them very nicely whether he can take it and enquire as to why they are getting rid of it

or

c) Leave the chair alone, because somebody probably died and/or shat themselves in it
(, Fri 18 Apr 2008, 22:46, archived)
I think you should do sexual intercourse and post pics on here

(, Fri 18 Apr 2008, 22:46, archived)
at the TOP

(, Fri 18 Apr 2008, 22:47, archived)
Well done.
You're King Spotty.
(, Fri 18 Apr 2008, 22:49, archived)
*click*

(, Fri 18 Apr 2008, 22:55, archived)
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
option A!!!!!!!
(, Fri 18 Apr 2008, 22:47, archived)
d) Don't be such a tink

(, Fri 18 Apr 2008, 22:47, archived)
3: it's only sensible
Then send us all some money.
(, Fri 18 Apr 2008, 22:47, archived)
THERE IS NO OPTION 3.

(, Fri 18 Apr 2008, 22:47, archived)
I like to be different.

(, Fri 18 Apr 2008, 22:48, archived)
3 wasn't an option

(, Fri 18 Apr 2008, 22:47, archived)
We'll go with two others then.
Your sexual requests are getting weirder.
(, Fri 18 Apr 2008, 22:49, archived)
Look it's not my fault you are boring
I need stimulation from somewhere.
(, Fri 18 Apr 2008, 22:50, archived)
I like to pee on you as much as the next man.

(, Fri 18 Apr 2008, 22:57, archived)
b!

(, Fri 18 Apr 2008, 22:47, archived)
a!
they might say no, and then you would have no free stuff
(, Fri 18 Apr 2008, 22:48, archived)
but they are old, and old people shoudl be treated right.
besides they might give you tea and cake
(, Fri 18 Apr 2008, 22:49, archived)
b.

(, Fri 18 Apr 2008, 22:47, archived)
It'll be covered in piss and death
Quite the bargain.
(, Fri 18 Apr 2008, 22:47, archived)
sounds like my sex life

(, Fri 18 Apr 2008, 22:49, archived)

sex
(, Fri 18 Apr 2008, 22:50, archived)
a)

(, Fri 18 Apr 2008, 22:47, archived)
b) seems the most acceptable option.
I hate to see good stuff just thrown away.
(, Fri 18 Apr 2008, 22:47, archived)
You and your boyfriend!

(, Fri 18 Apr 2008, 22:48, archived)
every time you sit in it
you'll think of the countless colostomy bags that have leaked down the wipe-clean cushion covers
(, Fri 18 Apr 2008, 22:48, archived)
As a Buddhist, arguments are an exercise in futility.

(, Fri 18 Apr 2008, 22:48, archived)
no they aren't
//predictable
(, Fri 18 Apr 2008, 22:49, archived)
As a Hindu, I find your hostility offensive.

(, Fri 18 Apr 2008, 22:50, archived)
as a sikh, i find your offence
sikh and ye shall find
(, Fri 18 Apr 2008, 22:52, archived)
SIKH AND DESTROY
Oh, Japes.
(, Fri 18 Apr 2008, 22:53, archived)
b, and offer them a fiver as goodwill
if you have a fiver to spare, anyway
(, Fri 18 Apr 2008, 22:48, archived)
I bet it started out white

the old are very piss
(, Fri 18 Apr 2008, 22:48, archived)
leave it well alone.
a bright yellow leather armchair sounds terribly vile
(, Fri 18 Apr 2008, 22:49, archived)
Even if they give it to you, it'll always smell of old people and disinfectant
I'd rather sit on the floor
(, Fri 18 Apr 2008, 22:49, archived)
d) throw it on the nearest skip
and go to DFS (Summer sale ends this weekend)
(, Fri 18 Apr 2008, 22:49, archived)
Well, we don't actually need a chair
He just really wants it. He's just put his coat on and gone to take a picture of it.

Have I moved in with Stig of the Dump?
(, Fri 18 Apr 2008, 22:52, archived)
DRY HUMP A SKIP.

(, Fri 18 Apr 2008, 22:49, archived)
I got your book in the post
I LOL'ed.
(, Fri 18 Apr 2008, 22:50, archived)
\THANK youou

(, Fri 18 Apr 2008, 22:54, archived)
WANK UP A LANDFILL

(, Fri 18 Apr 2008, 22:51, archived)