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Good Morning /talk.
The RUGBY.
:D
I may have got very VERY drunk last night. This morning though my taxi for work never showed up and I had to walk in.
:(
What's good and bad in your little worlds today? And what did you all get your mam for Mother's Day? I got mine chocolates.
(I helped save b3ta! stuj BRING BACK BALDMONKEY YOU BALLBAGS!, Sun 18 Mar 2012, 7:36, archived)
Good: I am off to see my internet girlfriend today.
Bad: I probably won't get any.
(I helped save b3ta! BraynDedd CHEER THE FUCK UP YOU MOANING TWATS, Sun 18 Mar 2012, 7:45, archived)
Worse: It's going to turn out to be baldmonkey in a dress.
Again.
(I helped save b3ta! stuj BRING BACK BALDMONKEY YOU BALLBAGS!, Sun 18 Mar 2012, 7:57, archived)
And something about S*xFace having already fucked her.

(I helped save b3ta! BraynDedd CHEER THE FUCK UP YOU MOANING TWATS, Sun 18 Mar 2012, 8:02, archived)
At least there's an upside
that'll make you seem completely awesome in the sack.
(I helped save b3ta! wynoh kills threads by his mere presence, Sun 18 Mar 2012, 8:04, archived)
I can confirm this to be true from past experience.

(I helped save b3ta! BraynDedd CHEER THE FUCK UP YOU MOANING TWATS, Sun 18 Mar 2012, 8:15, archived)
Here you are BD, you'll enjoy this one.
b3ta.com/questions/trainingcourses/post1563479
(I helped save b3ta! Amorous Badger : One of our most popular models., Sun 18 Mar 2012, 12:27, archived)
That's a cry for help if ever I saw one.

(I helped save b3ta! stuj BRING BACK BALDMONKEY YOU BALLBAGS!, Sun 18 Mar 2012, 12:48, archived)
I wasn't going to go there chap.
I know how much you miss S*xF*ce.
;p
(I helped save b3ta! stuj BRING BACK BALDMONKEY YOU BALLBAGS!, Sun 18 Mar 2012, 8:04, archived)
I didn't miss him at all, it was a direct hit, thank you very much.

(I helped save b3ta! BraynDedd CHEER THE FUCK UP YOU MOANING TWATS, Sun 18 Mar 2012, 8:09, archived)
Pfffft.

(I helped save b3ta! stuj BRING BACK BALDMONKEY YOU BALLBAGS!, Sun 18 Mar 2012, 8:11, archived)
Truefax
that was the worst case of flatnose I've ever seen.
(I helped save b3ta! wynoh kills threads by his mere presence, Sun 18 Mar 2012, 8:26, archived)
Good: stuff and things
Bad: I'm awake at 8am on a Sunday. I wasted 2 hours watching Taxi Driver last night. I've got to catch up on some work I didn't do last week.

Mothers day is two bunches of flowers made into one bunch and put back into the covering for one bunch, making it look much more expensive.
(I helped save b3ta! magnum, Sun 18 Mar 2012, 7:56, archived)
Damn, I wish I'd thought of that.

(I helped save b3ta! stuj BRING BACK BALDMONKEY YOU BALLBAGS!, Sun 18 Mar 2012, 7:57, archived)
Morning stuuuuuuuuuj!
Good: I'm having a curry for lunch.
Bad: pretty much everything else.
(I helped save b3ta! wynoh kills threads by his mere presence, Sun 18 Mar 2012, 7:57, archived)
'Ning The AWESOME Wynoh.
Man, I don't think Ive had a curry yet this month.
:(
I think I'm going to have to rectify that situation on my way home tonight.
:)
(I helped save b3ta! stuj BRING BACK BALDMONKEY YOU BALLBAGS!, Sun 18 Mar 2012, 8:00, archived)
Garlic chilli chicken
does the job for me every time.
(I helped save b3ta! wynoh kills threads by his mere presence, Sun 18 Mar 2012, 8:03, archived)
*Boiks*
Garlic is just fucking WRONGNESS.
(I helped save b3ta! stuj BRING BACK BALDMONKEY YOU BALLBAGS!, Sun 18 Mar 2012, 8:05, archived)
Oh you culinary imbecile.

(I helped save b3ta! BraynDedd CHEER THE FUCK UP YOU MOANING TWATS, Sun 18 Mar 2012, 8:21, archived)
Let it go
he's Welsh, they're trained on rarebit and larver bread.
(I helped save b3ta! wynoh kills threads by his mere presence, Sun 18 Mar 2012, 8:26, archived)
Nowt wrong with either.
Larva bread and bacon with cockles is an ACE breakfast.
(I helped save b3ta! stuj BRING BACK BALDMONKEY YOU BALLBAGS!, Sun 18 Mar 2012, 8:27, archived)
I have to admit this is true.
Where do you stand on black pudding?
(I helped save b3ta! wynoh kills threads by his mere presence, Sun 18 Mar 2012, 8:43, archived)
Bloody goodness.
:D
(I helped save b3ta! stuj BRING BACK BALDMONKEY YOU BALLBAGS!, Sun 18 Mar 2012, 9:10, archived)
I'm RIGHT and you KNOW IT.

(I helped save b3ta! stuj BRING BACK BALDMONKEY YOU BALLBAGS!, Sun 18 Mar 2012, 8:26, archived)
fuck all

(I helped save b3ta! mongychops handbrake?, that's not how i roll, Sun 18 Mar 2012, 9:21, archived)
Oh mongy.
You are a BAD SON.
:(
(I helped save b3ta! stuj BRING BACK BALDMONKEY YOU BALLBAGS!, Sun 18 Mar 2012, 9:24, archived)
how so?

(I helped save b3ta! mongychops handbrake?, that's not how i roll, Sun 18 Mar 2012, 9:26, archived)
If you didn't get your mam anything for Mother's Day you are WORSE THAN HITLER.
This is 100% FACT mongy.
(I helped save b3ta! stuj BRING BACK BALDMONKEY YOU BALLBAGS!, Sun 18 Mar 2012, 9:36, archived)
i dont have a mum

(I helped save b3ta! mongychops handbrake?, that's not how i roll, Sun 18 Mar 2012, 9:42, archived)
Oh.
I'm so sorry mongy. I never realised you were brought up by a gay couple.
(I helped save b3ta! stuj BRING BACK BALDMONKEY YOU BALLBAGS!, Sun 18 Mar 2012, 9:44, archived)
you feel sorry for peole who are gay? this is very offensive, i feel i should tell the mods about this, sorry stuj but you have crossed a line here

(I helped save b3ta! mongychops handbrake?, that's not how i roll, Sun 18 Mar 2012, 9:49, archived)
I didn't make the rules mongy.
God did that.
(I helped save b3ta! stuj BRING BACK BALDMONKEY YOU BALLBAGS!, Sun 18 Mar 2012, 9:54, archived)
i'm glad neptune isn't here, the lads good as gold and doesn't need your type of hatred

(I helped save b3ta! mongychops handbrake?, that's not how i roll, Sun 18 Mar 2012, 9:57, archived)
Stuj is, on the inside, a big ball of voilance and hatrid.
It's a blessing to the world that he has no influence on world politics, because he'd nuke the middle east 'till it was a giant shard of glass.

I heard he built the mediterainian ocean 'cus he doesn't like african people and wants to make it as dificault for them to get here, pre-flight-era, as possible.
(I helped save b3ta! Ain't no 'igger like Gonz the J-'igger LETS GO GOBBO LETS GO !, Sun 18 Mar 2012, 10:03, archived)
Shush it jewboy.
I'm LOVELY. Everyone says so.
(I helped save b3ta! stuj BRING BACK BALDMONKEY YOU BALLBAGS!, Sun 18 Mar 2012, 10:19, archived)
neptune wont, and i with him on this one, stick to pandering to the fat chicks

(I helped save b3ta! mongychops handbrake?, that's not how i roll, Sun 18 Mar 2012, 10:25, archived)
Neptune ALWAYS says I'm LOVELY.
I don't know why you're being so hateful this morning mongy. It's not MY fault that your mam gave you up for adoption to a couple of benders.
But because I'm so LOVELY, you can have some pandering anyway.
*Panders*
(I helped save b3ta! stuj BRING BACK BALDMONKEY YOU BALLBAGS!, Sun 18 Mar 2012, 10:34, archived)
shove it homophobe , go talk to your mates jenpots, janet and frisbee, you are all interchangerble dullards

(I helped save b3ta! mongychops handbrake?, that's not how i roll, Sun 18 Mar 2012, 10:39, archived)
Hahahahahah GUTTED.

(I helped save b3ta! stuj BRING BACK BALDMONKEY YOU BALLBAGS!, Sun 18 Mar 2012, 10:41, archived)
Have a poem.
Lonely mongy no mates
fishing on his own
Even fish don't love him
And his car's his home.
(I helped save b3ta! stuj BRING BACK BALDMONKEY YOU BALLBAGS!, Sun 18 Mar 2012, 10:43, archived)
tell us again how horny you are stuj, the forum loves that stuff, or talk about food? oh you all ready did that

(I helped save b3ta! mongychops handbrake?, that's not how i roll, Sun 18 Mar 2012, 10:46, archived)
Awww poor mongy.
UPSET ONLINE

Is stuj on Ignore now?
Has Mongy GAZed the Mods?
Is he crying on his keyboard?
What are the fucking odds?
(I helped save b3ta! stuj BRING BACK BALDMONKEY YOU BALLBAGS!, Sun 18 Mar 2012, 10:49, archived)
are you trying to get away from the fact you are a homophobe in this thread stuj? you can try and shift the focus onto me if you want but it doesn't stop the fact that you are a nasty piece of work

(I helped save b3ta! mongychops handbrake?, that's not how i roll, Sun 18 Mar 2012, 10:52, archived)
I'm no homophobe though mongy.
No matter how much you try to make out that I am. The plain fact is that I'm LOVELY and you're not.
(I helped save b3ta! stuj BRING BACK BALDMONKEY YOU BALLBAGS!, Sun 18 Mar 2012, 10:54, archived)
you are an old racist homophobe with online creepiness pouring out all over the forum
pubs open, l8rs
(I helped save b3ta! mongychops handbrake?, that's not how i roll, Sun 18 Mar 2012, 10:56, archived)
PHWOAR!
Enjoy yourself in the pub.
Alone.
(I helped save b3ta! stuj BRING BACK BALDMONKEY YOU BALLBAGS!, Sun 18 Mar 2012, 10:58, archived)
Take 100 big black cocks up the bum to prove that you're not a homophobic racist.

(I helped save b3ta! Ain't no 'igger like Gonz the J-'igger LETS GO GOBBO LETS GO !, Sun 18 Mar 2012, 11:54, archived)
That's next weekend sorted then Gonz.
;)
(I helped save b3ta! stuj BRING BACK BALDMONKEY YOU BALLBAGS!, Sun 18 Mar 2012, 11:55, archived)
last line doesn't quite scan, should probably be 'his car's his only home'.

(I helped save b3ta! spesh, Sun 18 Mar 2012, 11:18, archived)
Yeah but it's only for mongy.
I'm not going to bother prettying it up for him. He's not worth it.
(I helped save b3ta! stuj BRING BACK BALDMONKEY YOU BALLBAGS!, Sun 18 Mar 2012, 11:25, archived)
I'm tempted to delete this entire subthread just to upset him some more.
:D
(I helped save b3ta! stuj BRING BACK BALDMONKEY YOU BALLBAGS!, Sun 18 Mar 2012, 13:23, archived)
He LOVES a bit of thread-deletion does mongy.

(I helped save b3ta! stuj BRING BACK BALDMONKEY YOU BALLBAGS!, Sun 18 Mar 2012, 13:44, archived)
alright mongy
The Modern Toss cartoon in Private Eye this week is about you, don't know if you saw it.

www.b3tards.com/u/21ad4d43bdadf35828c6/mongytoss.jpg
(I helped save b3ta! spesh, Sun 18 Mar 2012, 11:01, archived)
Good: I've only got a short shift today!
Bad: I only got about 2 hours kip because ladypig decided to drink a little bit too much and decided to spend most of the night puking her pretty little guts out.

Another good, I saw TFD last night, and it reminded me that the 3 of us need to meet up for drinks with anyone else in the locality. LOLOXBASHLOL.
(I helped save b3ta! Windy Pig is a stupid cunt., Sun 18 Mar 2012, 9:30, archived)
HURRAH!
Boo!
How is The LOVELY Tee Eff Dee? Yeah I've GOT to get some time off to get into That Oxford soon.
(I helped save b3ta! stuj BRING BACK BALDMONKEY YOU BALLBAGS!, Sun 18 Mar 2012, 9:38, archived)
She was ace as far as i can tell,
Only a flying visit as I was passing through a party on my way home last night. You can come to the pub and we can drink till we can't see.
(I helped save b3ta! Windy Pig is a stupid cunt., Sun 18 Mar 2012, 10:11, archived)
I saw TWO B3tans this weekend!
Imagine that!
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats 9/11 still freaks my nut out to this day, Sun 18 Mar 2012, 10:17, archived)
*Imagines*
PHWOAR!
(I helped save b3ta! stuj BRING BACK BALDMONKEY YOU BALLBAGS!, Sun 18 Mar 2012, 10:20, archived)
baldmonkey doesn't count as 2 people.
He's just a bit chubby.
(I helped save b3ta! Windy Pig is a stupid cunt., Sun 18 Mar 2012, 10:47, archived)
It's a glandular problem.

(Baldmonkey's Mum, Sun 18 Mar 2012, 10:52, archived)
By which I mean that he's a large gland.

(Baldmonkey's Mum, Sun 18 Mar 2012, 10:53, archived)
Sounds like someone didn't even get petrol station flowers this year.

(I helped save b3ta! stuj BRING BACK BALDMONKEY YOU BALLBAGS!, Sun 18 Mar 2012, 11:04, archived)
Morning! Have you worked out how to get your t-shirt yet?

(I helped save b3ta! 2 Can Chunder : Cruise Control, Sun 18 Mar 2012, 10:39, archived)
morning mr chunder,
I haven't figured it out no. Maybe its all a scam.
(I helped save b3ta! Windy Pig is a stupid cunt., Sun 18 Mar 2012, 10:43, archived)
Just like that free laptop.
To be honest I can't see myself wearing a Darth Vader T-shirt but I suppose I could use it for cleaning my windows. Would it be rude to ask for the cash equivalent?
(I helped save b3ta! 2 Can Chunder : Cruise Control, Sun 18 Mar 2012, 10:56, archived)
I might ask Rob to sign it
And see if I can flog it to one of the cunts who seem to love him so much over on /board.
(I helped save b3ta! Windy Pig is a stupid cunt., Sun 18 Mar 2012, 11:58, archived)
Bad: I discovered six more holes on my car that need to be welded
Good: I'm a rationally-thinking independent human
(I helped save b3ta! Grrrmachine and then you go and spoil it all, Sun 18 Mar 2012, 10:04, archived)
HURRAH!

(I helped save b3ta! stuj BRING BACK BALDMONKEY YOU BALLBAGS!, Sun 18 Mar 2012, 10:18, archived)
They're speed holes. They make the car go faster.

(I helped save b3ta! 2 Can Chunder : Cruise Control, Sun 18 Mar 2012, 10:57, archived)
I'm alright, woke up in really bad pain but the lovely little tablet made that go away for a while, I got my treatment on wensday, that normally sorts me out a treat once it's kicked in.
This weekend I've been working on a website design for a new trendy nightclub in london, the brief is a bit wanky though, they want me to come up with logos, letter heads, envolopes, buisness cards (etc), and they said "You may use faux text" and "You will need to come up with 3 designs, if we choose you....".

It's a bit like getting a plumber in to install a new bathroom in a conseratory, and asking him to do bluepans for the whole conservatory, bathroom and then 'maybe' going for it.

However, my designs totally rock.
(I helped save b3ta! Ain't no 'igger like Gonz the J-'igger LETS GO GOBBO LETS GO !, Sun 18 Mar 2012, 10:50, archived)
HURRAH!
*Fingers crossed*
(I helped save b3ta! stuj BRING BACK BALDMONKEY YOU BALLBAGS!, Sun 18 Mar 2012, 10:51, archived)
I love that when we get asked for that sort of approach.
We just flip it back at them with an analogy like you have with the plumber, but to whatever their business sector is.
(I helped save b3ta! magnum, Sun 18 Mar 2012, 10:54, archived)
I hate it when they act like they're doing you a favour by taking you on.
Esspecially if they're a start-up.... I've proven myself in my industry, thats why they came to me. Can they say the same?
(I helped save b3ta! Ain't no 'igger like Gonz the J-'igger LETS GO GOBBO LETS GO !, Sun 18 Mar 2012, 11:51, archived)
It's a heck of a lot easier working with the larger companies
you state what you do, what you've done before and what you're going to do for them. They then decide whether or not they will use you. Start ups and smaller companies are more demanding and want the moon on a stick for pennies.
(I helped save b3ta! magnum, Sun 18 Mar 2012, 12:05, archived)

n e
(I helped save b3ta! magnum, Sun 18 Mar 2012, 12:06, archived)
Bad: I should probably get some work done, but can't be arsed
Good: fuck it, I'm off to watch the banger racing
(I helped save b3ta! Major Turd ington, Sun 18 Mar 2012, 10:51, archived)
That's a WIN! right there
:D
(I helped save b3ta! stuj BRING BACK BALDMONKEY YOU BALLBAGS!, Sun 18 Mar 2012, 10:53, archived)
I haven't been to banger racing for years
might go to one.
(I helped save b3ta! magnum, Sun 18 Mar 2012, 12:26, archived)
I gave my mum a new iron when I saw her last weekend. I also gave her a big pile of my shirts to try it with.

(I helped save b3ta! 2 Can Chunder : Cruise Control, Sun 18 Mar 2012, 11:00, archived)
Oh 2 Can.
You are every mother's dream son.
(I helped save b3ta! stuj BRING BACK BALDMONKEY YOU BALLBAGS!, Sun 18 Mar 2012, 11:06, archived)
bad: I woke up today and my face was stuck to the pillow
good: I helped a lost dog find its owner
(I helped save b3ta! glued eel /questions/questionsyoudliketoask/post1648081, Sun 18 Mar 2012, 14:27, archived)
PILLOW DROOL!
But HURRAH! for the good.
:D
(I helped save b3ta! stuj BRING BACK BALDMONKEY YOU BALLBAGS!, Sun 18 Mar 2012, 15:07, archived)