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morning Yeti

(, Wed 13 Sep 2017, 7:43, archived)
urg

(, Wed 13 Sep 2017, 7:53, archived)
I feel you man
I have the bonus issue of having burnt the tops of my feet at the beach yesterday and am now about to go on a 3h street food walking tour :(
(, Wed 13 Sep 2017, 8:23, archived)
Holidaybrag AND foood, nice work Richard!

(, Wed 13 Sep 2017, 8:29, archived)
very little hair grows on my feet since i burnt the heck out of them on my first few days in 'stralia

(, Wed 13 Sep 2017, 8:44, archived)

feet neck them on my first few days it 'stralia France
(, Wed 13 Sep 2017, 9:22, archived)
get back on it you lightweight

(, Wed 13 Sep 2017, 8:34, archived)
later

(, Wed 13 Sep 2017, 9:05, archived)
Hello mate.

(, Wed 13 Sep 2017, 7:55, archived)
Mr Windle yeaaah

(, Wed 13 Sep 2017, 8:23, archived)
There is panic here in college.
I might sneak off for a bit till it calms down.
(, Wed 13 Sep 2017, 9:10, archived)
Who's got their knickers in a twist then?

(, Wed 13 Sep 2017, 9:52, archived)
There's some nuisance tripping over in a lecture theatre on the lights.
It's intermittent and for some reason our PAT bloke has been dealing with it and not asked for my help. He hasn't found the fault and with a conference this afternoon my boss is livid with him for not coming down for help.
(, Wed 13 Sep 2017, 10:30, archived)
Noice.
I sense upcoming awareness training on the value of teamwork.
(, Wed 13 Sep 2017, 10:35, archived)
God said to Noah at Genesis 6:21: "And as for you, take for yourself every sort of food that is eaten; and you must gather it to yourself, and it must serve as food for you and for them."
Beyond that, the logistics of feeding, watering and taking care of an entire zoo in a big box may seem implausible, but so are parting the Red Sea, manna, resurrections and the ten plagues. That's kind of the point.

If some people choose not to believe in miracles because they are, well . . . miraculous, that is their choice.

The fact that practically all ancient cultures have a flood legend does not indicate that the Bible stole the story from one of them. Think about it.

P.S. As for the universe being created in six 24-hour days, that is an invention of man, not the Bible. The first Genesis narrative is from God's perspective, obviously, because no human was there to observe it.
As for God's perspective on time, He inspired Moses to record this: "For a thousand years are in your eyes but as yesterday when it is past, and as a watch during the night."(Psalm 90:4).
For the sake of defining a period of time, the Genesis account calls those creative periods "days", but we also use the term to describe longer periods of time, as in "back in my grandfather's day".
We know from observation that the physical universe has been in existence for billions of years, but even Big Bang theorists acknowledge a beginning.

P.P.S. The argument that miracles do not happen will not hold up here. Neither will attacks on my parentage, education or eyesight. Please believe as you choose to believe and keep your ministry of derision to yourselves.
(, Wed 13 Sep 2017, 8:02, archived)
You blind thick bastard of a whore

(, Wed 13 Sep 2017, 8:06, archived)
Yeah well we all know that Noah was a alien who took DNA samples of every living thing and then rebuilt them all afterwards on his 3D printer

(, Wed 13 Sep 2017, 8:09, archived)
Also, killing all the animals with a flood was a bit excessive if it's only the humans at fault, couldn't he just invent a selective virus, like when He tried to kill off all the gay

(, Wed 13 Sep 2017, 8:11, archived)
What was God doing talking to spanish's tranny kid?

(, Wed 13 Sep 2017, 8:25, archived)
how many animals do you think were taken along as food for noah and all the other animals?

(, Wed 13 Sep 2017, 8:40, archived)
5

(, Wed 13 Sep 2017, 8:41, archived)
No wait 7

(, Wed 13 Sep 2017, 8:41, archived)
what was the vegetarian option?

(, Wed 13 Sep 2017, 8:55, archived)
Quail

(, Wed 13 Sep 2017, 9:01, archived)
Quails are definitely vegetarian

(, Wed 13 Sep 2017, 9:02, archived)
Guy Fieri was selected as chef

(, Wed 13 Sep 2017, 8:41, archived)
I'LL BE LOOKING FOR YOU NEXT FLOOD

(, Wed 13 Sep 2017, 8:42, archived)
PUT IT THERE, BROTHER

(, Wed 13 Sep 2017, 8:44, archived)
one should not dicuss politics or religion with friends

(, Wed 13 Sep 2017, 9:43, archived)
Beefster.
Have you started waving your hands around wildly while you talk yet?
(, Wed 13 Sep 2017, 8:02, archived)
He's pinching all the young boys bums from his Vespa

(, Wed 13 Sep 2017, 8:09, archived)
I've nicked four handbags today already

(, Wed 13 Sep 2017, 8:27, archived)
Frutti di mare m8, frutti di mare

(, Wed 13 Sep 2017, 8:25, archived)
They've been called Starburst for ages now, keep up.

(, Wed 13 Sep 2017, 8:34, archived)
Woo woo yayyy
morneeen
(, Wed 13 Sep 2017, 8:04, archived)
You betcha

(, Wed 13 Sep 2017, 8:26, archived)
Tits and fannies and that

(, Wed 13 Sep 2017, 8:18, archived)
and willies m8, consider the lady boarder's

(, Wed 13 Sep 2017, 8:25, archived)
And bollocks

(, Wed 13 Sep 2017, 8:26, archived)
There are no lady boarders.

(, Wed 13 Sep 2017, 8:26, archived)
But there are plenty of lardy boarders

(, Wed 13 Sep 2017, 8:28, archived)
^clever wordplay

(, Wed 13 Sep 2017, 8:30, archived)
I'm the Giles Brandreth of slashtalk

(, Wed 13 Sep 2017, 8:33, archived)
Universally detested and a complete prick?
Can confirm
(, Wed 13 Sep 2017, 8:35, archived)
That was the joke, yes.

(, Wed 13 Sep 2017, 8:40, archived)
It's not a joke m8

(, Wed 13 Sep 2017, 8:42, archived)
bit exclusive

(, Wed 13 Sep 2017, 8:33, archived)
Jesus loves you

(, Wed 13 Sep 2017, 8:35, archived)
amen brother

(, Wed 13 Sep 2017, 8:39, archived)
Jesus and only Jesus

(, Wed 13 Sep 2017, 8:40, archived)
That's what makes it so desirable

(, Wed 13 Sep 2017, 8:40, archived)
This is an overreaching and overbearing executive

(, Wed 13 Sep 2017, 8:44, archived)
Hi

(, Wed 13 Sep 2017, 8:43, archived)
good morning

(, Wed 13 Sep 2017, 8:48, archived)
Yes indeedy, I wrote graffiti on the bus

(, Wed 13 Sep 2017, 9:02, archived)
$999/£999 for the new iPhone. Gosh
that's a LOT of money for a phone.
(, Wed 13 Sep 2017, 8:46, archived)
buy it

(, Wed 13 Sep 2017, 8:47, archived)
but... but... I NEED that kidney mister!

(, Wed 13 Sep 2017, 9:00, archived)
Never mind muggings, there'll probably be murders committed to steal this

(, Wed 13 Sep 2017, 8:48, archived)
It's an entirely retarded amount of money for a phone.
The big cheeses at Apple are going to retire from their official day jobs now and spend 9-5, Mon-Fri wanking into gigantic piles of money and having champagne enemas.
(, Wed 13 Sep 2017, 8:53, archived)
Dear mums, Alcatels start at 13 quid sim free if your kid really must be reachable, pokemon gyms are full of nonces anyway, hth

(, Wed 13 Sep 2017, 8:58, archived)
I'm getting 3

(, Wed 13 Sep 2017, 9:02, archived)
might get one and smash it straight out of the box to make the apple nerds cry

(, Wed 13 Sep 2017, 9:05, archived)
Barry Manilow'zzzz

(, Wed 13 Sep 2017, 9:06, archived)
I smashed a phone in Reno just to watch him cry
Johnny Cash's zzzzzz
(, Wed 13 Sep 2017, 9:31, archived)
I've already got 2.

(, Wed 13 Sep 2017, 9:10, archived)
Can it run Crysis?

(, Wed 13 Sep 2017, 9:13, archived)
Can you get the facebook app for it?
Because I only want it if you can get the facebook app for it
(, Wed 13 Sep 2017, 9:17, archived)
I'm afraid not

(, Wed 13 Sep 2017, 9:24, archived)
It has about 8 front-facing sensors for perfect selfies
we may have reached peak something or other.
(, Wed 13 Sep 2017, 9:32, archived)
Is this true
I don't want this to be true
(, Wed 13 Sep 2017, 9:34, archived)
6, actually, I was counting other bits
tctechcrunch2011.files.wordpress.com/2017/09/frontcam_depth_iphone-x.jpg?w=738
(, Wed 13 Sep 2017, 10:35, archived)
isn't this more to do with facial recognition technology than self portrait photography?

(, Wed 13 Sep 2017, 10:47, archived)
I don't know

(, Wed 13 Sep 2017, 13:22, archived)
Peak brand slavery, by the sound of it.

(, Wed 13 Sep 2017, 9:40, archived)
None of the current apps will work, you have to get special new exclusive ones at £50 per month each

(, Wed 13 Sep 2017, 9:32, archived)
it's worth it though

(, Wed 13 Sep 2017, 9:43, archived)
If you can think of a quicker way of getting Marilyn Monroe quotes, I'd like to hear it

(, Wed 13 Sep 2017, 9:48, archived)
Will it wank my tits?

(, Wed 13 Sep 2017, 10:19, archived)
if it won't I will

(, Wed 13 Sep 2017, 10:48, archived)
thx babe xx

(, Wed 13 Sep 2017, 11:00, archived)
The wind has made a bit of a mess in my garden (wrecked the awning and the ping pong table)
so I expect the government will be redirecting some of that aid money from the overseas territories in order to help me get things in order.
(, Wed 13 Sep 2017, 9:10, archived)
Awning has broken, like the first awning.

(, Wed 13 Sep 2017, 9:18, archived)
racists on the isle of sheppy? nah, just harmless fun
www.kentonline.co.uk/sheerness/news/controversial-fundraisers-staging-comeback-131992/
(, Wed 13 Sep 2017, 9:19, archived)
I'm well up for it

(, Wed 13 Sep 2017, 9:30, archived)
Is it still true that adoption is encouraged on Sheppey, in the hope of diversifying their gene pool?

(, Wed 13 Sep 2017, 9:30, archived)
Nah it's just the way these trousers hang

(, Wed 13 Sep 2017, 9:58, archived)