that article starts to seem more surreal the further you read(
manolith hooray for me, Thu 10 Aug 2017, 16:36,
archived)
LOLthe things one learns from teh interwebz
(
Woodkovsky ☹️➝🚻➝🚽➝😣➝💩➝🧻➝😁, Thu 10 Aug 2017, 17:54,
archived)
FingernailsIt is a thin margin from totally fine length to jesus christ I've scratched myself to shit.
(
keybo was imtypingonakeyboard, now I'm not, Thu 10 Aug 2017, 14:57,
archived)
Yes, unless yours are frequently pulled out by gangsters(
keybo was imtypingonakeyboard, now I'm not, Thu 10 Aug 2017, 16:10,
archived)
Mine are usually rather long You learn to be careful after a while
(
Smash Monkey 2 The damp spastic, Thu 10 Aug 2017, 15:37,
archived)
Still playing for DerbyIlovefootballbeingbackitistheBEST
(
keybo was imtypingonakeyboard, now I'm not, Thu 10 Aug 2017, 15:09,
archived)
he wasn't all that at charlton, 13 goals in the season when we sold him to spurs, 18 the year before(
mongychops, Thu 10 Aug 2017, 15:45,
archived)
He's no Dwight Gayle(
keybo was imtypingonakeyboard, now I'm not, Thu 10 Aug 2017, 16:11,
archived)
we'll see who's bent, m8(
Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Thu 10 Aug 2017, 15:29,
archived)
Posovem putu, debelom grudju.(
.Yeti. El amor en los tiempos del cólera, Thu 10 Aug 2017, 15:09,
archived)
Let's get in the way, busty(
Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Thu 10 Aug 2017, 15:30,
archived)
Is this some kind of bust?(
.Yeti. El amor en los tiempos del cólera, Thu 10 Aug 2017, 15:32,
archived)
yes, it's very impressive(
Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Thu 10 Aug 2017, 15:33,
archived)
Bishop Desmond Poopo(
Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Thu 10 Aug 2017, 15:17,
archived)
Archbishop to you, prickIs what I imagine he'd say to you.
(
keybo was imtypingonakeyboard, now I'm not, Thu 10 Aug 2017, 15:19,
archived)
He's known to swear like a docker(
Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Thu 10 Aug 2017, 15:21,
archived)
He left a review on Amazon for the Profanisaurus"Tame"
(
keybo was imtypingonakeyboard, now I'm not, Thu 10 Aug 2017, 16:12,
archived)
ive heard the gossip from the street to the slammer they're trying to see if mongy stays true to his grammar(
mongychops, Thu 10 Aug 2017, 15:28,
archived)
Just found out one of the Porters doesn't believe in the moon landing.Also thinks 9/11 was an inside job and that Thatcher personally ordered the sinking of HMS Sheffield.
What's your favourite mental colleague or pub mate or family member?
Soz mongy.
(
Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Thu 10 Aug 2017, 12:51,
archived)
Ha.You capitalising 'Porters' made me wonder 'Gail? Janet Street?'. I no longer have any mental colleagues, unfortunately. I used to work with a girl who was a fervent proponent of relaxation and yoga, and who was the most stressed-ou person I've ever met.
(
.Yeti. El amor en los tiempos del cólera, Thu 10 Aug 2017, 12:54,
archived)
What was her star sign?(
Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Thu 10 Aug 2017, 13:02,
archived)
Don't know.She was a right cow so any conversation with her was kept to an absolute and work-related minimum.
(
.Yeti. El amor en los tiempos del cólera, Thu 10 Aug 2017, 13:03,
archived)
Typical Capricorn(
Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Thu 10 Aug 2017, 13:05,
archived)
I worked with a girl who was sad when she saw a shooting star because 'it's when stars die and drop out of the sky'(
Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Thu 10 Aug 2017, 13:05,
archived)
Don't worry, she's got yours, m8(
Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Thu 10 Aug 2017, 13:07,
archived)
I used to work with a butterface who was well mentalLost touch with her for a few years, then bumped into her in the street one day. She'd told me she was doing CrossFit within 30 seconds, she was that mental.
(
Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Thu 10 Aug 2017, 13:07,
archived)
Body off Baywatch, face off Badger Watch.(
.Yeti. El amor en los tiempos del cólera, Thu 10 Aug 2017, 13:14,
archived)
Looks like I picked the wrong day to come to the forum (
mongychops, Thu 10 Aug 2017, 12:55,
archived)
Are you a moon landing denier?(
Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Thu 10 Aug 2017, 12:57,
archived)
Is this about hosiery?(
monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Thu 10 Aug 2017, 13:00,
archived)
Oh, wait, you're retired. Hang on I'll edit this for you.(
Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Thu 10 Aug 2017, 12:57,
archived)
Colleague of mine once recommended I watch the Loose Change videos.He's otherwise sane.
(
monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Thu 10 Aug 2017, 12:58,
archived)
(
Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Thu 10 Aug 2017, 12:59,
archived)
What's that then?Don't want to Google it just in case.
(
Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Thu 10 Aug 2017, 13:02,
archived)
It's the "jet fuel can't melt steel beams" lot.I've not watched any of it, for obvious reasons.
(
monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Thu 10 Aug 2017, 13:05,
archived)
It's the "jet fuel can't melt steel beams" lot.I've not watched any of it, for obvious reasons.
(
monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Thu 10 Aug 2017, 13:05,
archived)
This double post is clear evidence of some sort of conspiracy.(
monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Thu 10 Aug 2017, 13:07,
archived)
It's the "jet fuel can't melt steel beams" lot.I've not watched any of it, for obvious reasons.
(
$$ ✅, Thu 10 Aug 2017, 13:06,
archived)
^ agent of the Illuminati(
monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Thu 10 Aug 2017, 13:10,
archived)
It's the "jet fuel can't melt steel beams" lotI've not watched any of it, for obvious reasons
(
Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Thu 10 Aug 2017, 13:07,
archived)
^ shilling for the Rothschilds(
monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Thu 10 Aug 2017, 13:10,
archived)
It's the "jet fuel can't melt steel beams" lot.I've not watched any of it, for obvious reasons.
(
manolith hooray for me, Thu 10 Aug 2017, 13:17,
archived)
^ mod for b3ta.com(
monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Thu 10 Aug 2017, 13:23,
archived)
all communication with him was curt for the next three months after thatand then he had the cheek to ask for a character reference as he was changing jobs.
(
Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Thu 10 Aug 2017, 13:08,
archived)
If you don't know who the mental one is, it's probably you mate.(
Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Thu 10 Aug 2017, 13:10,
archived)
Do you wear a wakki tie?(
Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Thu 10 Aug 2017, 13:12,
archived)
The mental of course Believes lemon juice cures heartburn, belly buttons are evil and once had a plastic shopping bag stuck to her wall for 6 years because she liked the pattern
(
Smash Monkey 2 The damp spastic, Thu 10 Aug 2017, 13:15,
archived)
the lemon juice one is right, so she may well be right about the rest(
mongychops, Thu 10 Aug 2017, 13:22,
archived)
You need to water it down, but this is true(
Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Thu 10 Aug 2017, 13:23,
archived)
"Drink your weak lemon drink."(
monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Thu 10 Aug 2017, 13:32,
archived)
Yeah, sounds like she's got her head screwed on.(
Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Thu 10 Aug 2017, 13:24,
archived)
the 'evil belly button' one is a bit more difficult to prove, thoughBut only because 'evil' itself is a difficult concept to define
(
Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Thu 10 Aug 2017, 13:29,
archived)
Mine is certainly not of pure thought. (
Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Thu 10 Aug 2017, 13:32,
archived)
Mother Theresa didn't have one (
Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Thu 10 Aug 2017, 13:46,
archived)
She was a "nipple neck"?(
monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Thu 10 Aug 2017, 13:49,
archived)
b3ta.com/talk/8105619
(
Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Thu 10 Aug 2017, 13:50,
archived)
Term of abuse for the genetically engineered soldiers from popular sci-fi "Space: Above and Beyond".Grown in tanks of fluid, what would be their belly buttons were located on the backs of their necks.
I loved that series.
(
monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Thu 10 Aug 2017, 13:54,
archived)
Hardly practical, since your digestive system is nowhere near(
drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Thu 10 Aug 2017, 13:56,
archived)
Next time I'm in hospital, I'll insist they put the cannula in my belly button.(
monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Thu 10 Aug 2017, 14:05,
archived)
There was a woman here who once said that"This door has to be permanently closed. I mean, what if a gunman came in? There are a lot of mothers in here and I couldn't live wit the fact they could die."
Right.
(
keybo was imtypingonakeyboard, now I'm not, Thu 10 Aug 2017, 13:45,
archived)
Doors are like kryptonite to crazed pro adoption gun men.(
Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Thu 10 Aug 2017, 13:47,
archived)
How are you going to deal with this chapPersonally every time he says something like "Today is going to be nice" I'd reply "Pfft, that's what they want you to think"
(
keybo was imtypingonakeyboard, now I'm not, Thu 10 Aug 2017, 13:50,
archived)
I just told him I could not speak to him about it because it would just make me annoyed.(
Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Thu 10 Aug 2017, 13:51,
archived)
Lock the door, lest they escape.It's for their own good.
(
monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Thu 10 Aug 2017, 13:50,
archived)
I'd be more worried about a banana in the tailpipe(
keybo was imtypingonakeyboard, now I'm not, Thu 10 Aug 2017, 13:57,
archived)
That was an OK thread.My boss has gone out for the rest of the day so the temptation to crack open a beer and faff around is strong. Why should you be fired? Answers on a P45 to the usual address.
(
.Yeti. El amor en los tiempos del cólera, Thu 10 Aug 2017, 11:02,
archived)
I'm pretty sure we're not going to have this job finished by term time. I'm not even sure anyone has ordered the kitchen yet.
(
Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Thu 10 Aug 2017, 11:08,
archived)
All projects are a slow motion car crashWell the ones I work on are.
(
keybo was imtypingonakeyboard, now I'm not, Thu 10 Aug 2017, 11:21,
archived)
The painters are here and the chippy hasn't got the studding up for the kitchen yet.(
Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Thu 10 Aug 2017, 11:26,
archived)
I think you've taken the conventional menstruation euphemism a little far here.(
.Yeti. El amor en los tiempos del cólera, Thu 10 Aug 2017, 11:28,
archived)
Because, after almost 10 yearsI still don't really know what I'm doing
(
Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Thu 10 Aug 2017, 11:10,
archived)
Have a poo(
Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Thu 10 Aug 2017, 11:11,
archived)
50% of my decisions are undermined by other people, so I'm ever only right about half the timeGlad to know we are all charlatans hanging on for dear life, makes me practically joyous.
(
keybo was imtypingonakeyboard, now I'm not, Thu 10 Aug 2017, 11:19,
archived)
I constantly blag my way through thingsand I'm not the only person at work who does so. Most of us are just making it up as we go along, while claiming to be experts.
(
Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Thu 10 Aug 2017, 11:23,
archived)
I'd love to go back to work in early 90's web designThat was truly make shit up as you go along territory.
"Lots of buttons. And put text on those buttons."
(
keybo was imtypingonakeyboard, now I'm not, Thu 10 Aug 2017, 11:28,
archived)
This is why I have firmly refused to work in project management.(
.Yeti. El amor en los tiempos del cólera, Thu 10 Aug 2017, 11:26,
archived)
Have been forced into it in my role reallyAbsolutely hate it, have had no formal training and have been offered none. If someone fired me I'd be pretty happy right now.
(
keybo was imtypingonakeyboard, now I'm not, Thu 10 Aug 2017, 11:30,
archived)
Type out a letter of dismissal and forge your manager's signature on it.Job's a good 'un.
(
.Yeti. El amor en los tiempos del cólera, Thu 10 Aug 2017, 11:33,
archived)
here's your training1. call absolutely EVERYTHING a "process"
2. you know better than everyone else how long their jobs take
(
drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Thu 10 Aug 2017, 11:36,
archived)
There are far many good developers that have been promoted into being shit managers.(
Slippery Mick ‏, Thu 10 Aug 2017, 11:42,
archived)
Far many developers are led it off the road?(
Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Thu 10 Aug 2017, 11:42,
archived)
All the cut will be absorbed by it been a developer (
Smash Monkey 2 The damp spastic, Thu 10 Aug 2017, 12:18,
archived)
Still, at least Beetlejuice Lego Dimensions is a thing(
Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Thu 10 Aug 2017, 11:23,
archived)
that's a nice fucking model(
drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Thu 10 Aug 2017, 11:32,
archived)
15 quid tho, fuck that noise(
drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Thu 10 Aug 2017, 11:37,
archived)
They're all that priceBest thing to do is wait until someone does a 'buy 2, get 1 free' deal.
(
Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Thu 10 Aug 2017, 11:48,
archived)
One of the blokes here buys cheap nfc tags and downloads stuff on to them to get free Lego stuff.I think. I don't understand it.
(
Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Thu 10 Aug 2017, 12:06,
archived)
Fair enoughIf he only wants to play the game, and not own the toys themselves, it makes perfect sense
(
Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Thu 10 Aug 2017, 12:07,
archived)
IT'S ILLEGAL.(
Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Thu 10 Aug 2017, 12:21,
archived)
I was about to start doing that for skylanders,but the kids lost interest in that game, so I didn't bother.
(
monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Thu 10 Aug 2017, 12:27,
archived)
That and Army Of Darkness are films I'd love to let my kids watch,but don't as I won't let them watch anything rated above 12, on principle. Even though none of them are strangers to the word "fuck".
And Gremlins, I suppose - didn't that used to be a PG?
(
monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Thu 10 Aug 2017, 12:09,
archived)
they have shown a cut version during the day of beetlejuice (
mongychops, Thu 10 Aug 2017, 12:34,
archived)
Indeed. I think that's the only version I've ever seen, but it's not the version on Amazon.Similarly, I was shocked at the amount of swearing in Back To The Future, when I got that on DVD. "You're really gonna see some stuff" indeed.
(
monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Thu 10 Aug 2017, 12:46,
archived)
I've got a backlog of work building up and no incentive to actually do itI'm paid to be a writer but I write more on here than in my actual job
(
Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Thu 10 Aug 2017, 11:29,
archived)
So technically you are being paid while you write.(
.Yeti. El amor en los tiempos del cólera, Thu 10 Aug 2017, 11:30,
archived)
either way, no-one reads all this shit I type(
Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Thu 10 Aug 2017, 12:34,
archived)
you should be PROMOTED for wanking, m8(
Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Thu 10 Aug 2017, 11:54,
archived)
Wanks are on the house!(
Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Thu 10 Aug 2017, 11:56,
archived)
we've got a hot one for you, can you take care of it?(
drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Thu 10 Aug 2017, 11:59,
archived)
*listens for the beat box**awaits McBeef stripping off*
(
Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Thu 10 Aug 2017, 12:03,
archived)
That was a peculiar song wasn't itLots going on. The plastic men are coming!!!
(
Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Thu 10 Aug 2017, 12:03,
archived)
Today's musicians don't take anywhere near enough drugs(
drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Thu 10 Aug 2017, 12:13,
archived)
Because I'm 14 months late for work (
Smash Monkey 2 The damp spastic, Thu 10 Aug 2017, 12:15,
archived)
I would love to call in sick due to being 14 moths
(
Smash Monkey 2 The damp spastic, Thu 10 Aug 2017, 12:22,
archived)
rubbish voltrons don't get sick pay(
drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Thu 10 Aug 2017, 12:26,
archived)
morningmonsoon level storm here
(
Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Thu 10 Aug 2017, 6:59,
archived)
2 threads in a row is well rude m8(
Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Thu 10 Aug 2017, 7:13,
archived)
mornosSun's out here, it's fucking August, this isn't right
(
H.B.Mupps, Thu 10 Aug 2017, 7:18,
archived)
it's going to be 35 degrees later today(
Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Thu 10 Aug 2017, 7:20,
archived)
what sort of retards still use that unit?(
Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Thu 10 Aug 2017, 7:29,
archived)
Morning. My colleague is just stood here telling me in a really long winded way about the athletics he watched yesterday. It is boring
(
Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Thu 10 Aug 2017, 7:58,
archived)
have you told him you'e not interested in that stuff?(
Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Thu 10 Aug 2017, 8:06,
archived)
I have.(
Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Thu 10 Aug 2017, 8:18,
archived)
start telling him about different types of Czechoslovakian bike carbs(
Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Thu 10 Aug 2017, 8:32,
archived)
Good idea.(
Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Thu 10 Aug 2017, 8:32,
archived)
Tell him that the last time you were impressed by running and jumping you were in primary school.(, Thu 10 Aug 2017, 8:11, archived)
Morning like innit and stuff.It's a bit nippy today. Lol that sounds like nipples lol.
Last night I rewatched 'Machete' for the lulz.
(
.Yeti. El amor en los tiempos del cólera, Thu 10 Aug 2017, 8:18,
archived)
Him wot plays Machete did the voice of Jaguar in the latest Rick and Morty(
Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Thu 10 Aug 2017, 8:32,
archived)
That dunt mean nowt to me cos I don't watch Rick and Morty.But I totally believe you and stuff. Danny Trejo has an eminently voiceover-y voice.
(
.Yeti. El amor en los tiempos del cólera, Thu 10 Aug 2017, 8:34,
archived)
yer, I clocked that as soon as the character opened his mouthand susan sarandon(sp?) was the chinky doctor
(
Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Thu 10 Aug 2017, 9:48,
archived)
What is this, Thursday or something?(
monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Thu 10 Aug 2017, 8:37,
archived)
I think soComing back from holiday on a sunday, and having the family at home during the week is really throwing me. Might eat some poison. Or have another coffee. Haven't decided yet.
(
Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Thu 10 Aug 2017, 8:47,
archived)
I already tried thatDon't get me wrong, it made me feel better, but I'm still not completely with it, yeah?
(
Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Thu 10 Aug 2017, 8:50,
archived)
I just need to BELIEVE(
Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Thu 10 Aug 2017, 9:47,
archived)
pretty pleased with this one, not gonna lie(
manolith hooray for me, Thu 10 Aug 2017, 9:55,
archived)
I can state on good authority that the "I like this!" button has been clicked in respect of thisbecause I'm the one who clicked it.
(
.Yeti. El amor en los tiempos del cólera, Thu 10 Aug 2017, 10:06,
archived)
i saw it had one click and assumed it was hotfuck. he likes references to old videogames(
manolith hooray for me, Thu 10 Aug 2017, 10:24,
archived)
I don't get it, but based on your previous posts, I'm sure it's fantastic(
Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Thu 10 Aug 2017, 10:06,
archived)
he's a rapping dog from the original playstation era who talks a lot about needing to believewww.digital-polyphony.com/tumblr_m6yooky8JB1rxpwjno1_250.gif
(
manolith hooray for me, Thu 10 Aug 2017, 10:23,
archived)
Hope you had a good holiday, 2H.Off on mine, next week.
(
monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Thu 10 Aug 2017, 8:51,
archived)
It was quite good, thank youWhere are you going?
(
Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Thu 10 Aug 2017, 8:51,
archived)
I was going to say Chorley, maybe Preston(
Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Thu 10 Aug 2017, 9:00,
archived)
St Ives.Poorly traveled that I am, I've never been to Cornwall. Or Devon, so I'll probably cause offence when I eat a cream tea improperly.
(
monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Thu 10 Aug 2017, 9:03,
archived)
Not doing it in one go, spending a day a Wookey Hole, or somewhere, on the way down and overnight in a hotel before continuing on.(
monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Thu 10 Aug 2017, 9:11,
archived)
Cheddar is brilliant(
Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Thu 10 Aug 2017, 9:13,
archived)
I do love a toastie.(
monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Thu 10 Aug 2017, 9:14,
archived)
Two words, m8: Cave Cheese(
Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Thu 10 Aug 2017, 9:17,
archived)
Richard mcbeef is Fanny Chmelar - ask him anything!(
monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Thu 10 Aug 2017, 9:21,
archived)
I ain't asking him shit(
Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Thu 10 Aug 2017, 9:23,
archived)
agree, cider and cheese, what's not to love, hard slog from the bottom to the top tho (
mongychops, Thu 10 Aug 2017, 9:15,
archived)
The cheese is excellentThe caves are well worth a look too.
(
Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Thu 10 Aug 2017, 9:16,
archived)
All you have to do, is look down!(
Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Thu 10 Aug 2017, 9:19,
archived)
Remember, the answer is 2,801or 1. Or 'fuck off prick'.
(
Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Thu 10 Aug 2017, 9:08,
archived)
by which I mean, have a lovely timeI am a big fan of the west country
(
Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Thu 10 Aug 2017, 9:08,
archived)
get the boat to seal island, the kids will love that, cheeky seals (
mongychops, Thu 10 Aug 2017, 9:14,
archived)
Good shout - I think a boat trip is on our itinerary.(
monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Thu 10 Aug 2017, 9:15,
archived)
you just blew my mind(
Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Thu 10 Aug 2017, 9:53,
archived)
are you sure you wouldn't prefer a queer?(
manolith hooray for me, Thu 10 Aug 2017, 9:44,
archived)
The sun has got his hat on today(
Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Thu 10 Aug 2017, 8:44,
archived)
ugh, nice oneI'm going to get all sorts of shit now, cheers
(
Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Thu 10 Aug 2017, 8:49,
archived)
here we go+ here we go, here we gooo
(
Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Thu 10 Aug 2017, 9:22,
archived)
storms finished, sun's out with his guns out(
Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Thu 10 Aug 2017, 9:06,
archived)
I've put the washing machine on!Imagine that!
(
Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Thu 10 Aug 2017, 9:09,
archived)
I was thrilled to be able to put some washing out, this morning.I resent using the tumble drier in the summer months.
(
monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Thu 10 Aug 2017, 9:13,
archived)
People next door use theirs all the timeDrives me crazy. I know it shouldn't, but it does.
(
Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Thu 10 Aug 2017, 9:16,
archived)
(
Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Thu 10 Aug 2017, 9:23,
archived)
and now over to sally traffic(
Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Thu 10 Aug 2017, 9:30,
archived)
nominative determinism strikes again(
Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Thu 10 Aug 2017, 9:50,
archived)
Dunno what that is, soz.(
stuj (^(^;;^)^) GO TEAM SPIDERS!(^(^;;^)^), Wed 9 Aug 2017, 21:07,
archived)
the eye is placed like that of the Sloth, very close to the mouth and nose, which gives it a clumsy awkward appearance, and void of elegance in the combination... they have little either in their character or appearance to interest the Naturalist or Philosopher. As Nature however provides nothing in vain, we may suppose that even these torpid, senseless creatures are wisely intended to fill up one of the great links of the chain of animated nature
(
drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Wed 9 Aug 2017, 21:10,
archived)
I'd stick www.b3ta.com/users/profile.php?id=12493
Up front vlad
(
mongychops, Wed 9 Aug 2017, 21:14,
archived)
Cool, another spare email address to sign up for dodgy shit with(
drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Wed 9 Aug 2017, 21:18,
archived)
I don't know mongy his form was really poor last season, and there was all that fuss about that girl what went missing, can we afford him distracting the rest of the squad with his nonsense
(
vladimir, Wed 9 Aug 2017, 21:27,
archived)
The season hasn't started yet, I'm just putting it out there (
mongychops, Wed 9 Aug 2017, 21:34,
archived)
OK let's give him a chance, but one eating-a-pasty-in-goal stunt, or any rumours of any more missing girls, and he's on the bench on a permanent basis
(
vladimir, Wed 9 Aug 2017, 21:44,
archived)
you should definitely be on the team with this kind of talkyou can do all the press conferences afterwards ideally
(
vladimir, Wed 9 Aug 2017, 21:45,
archived)
I'm just glad all the boys played their hearts out, even if the score doesn't reflect what we had hoped, we had a nice time on the pitch and isn't that what it's all about?(
Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Wed 9 Aug 2017, 22:13,
archived)
Yes.here it is
(
Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Wed 9 Aug 2017, 22:14,
archived)
Yeah, don't eat!lol
(
Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 9 Aug 2017, 23:20,
archived)
I preferred you in French (
Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Wed 9 Aug 2017, 23:56,
archived)
Fantasy FootballIs there a b3ta fantasy football league this year? I need something to keep me busy when I'm not crywanking.
(, Wed 9 Aug 2017, 17:17, archived)
Yeah, as the guys said, twohats is your man.(
Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Wed 9 Aug 2017, 18:58,
archived)
Yeah, I arrange all that(
Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 9 Aug 2017, 19:37,
archived)
The people who say you cheat are nobs mate, keep going (
mongychops, Wed 9 Aug 2017, 19:46,
archived)
You don't have the money, pisstake if this is allowed (
mongychops, Wed 9 Aug 2017, 20:23,
archived)
Come on Dollars, you KNOW you can't(
Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 9 Aug 2017, 20:37,
archived)
hellowww.b3ta.com/links/FOOTBALL_FOOTBALL_FOOTBALL:2
(
sock more tea vicar?, Wed 9 Aug 2017, 19:45,
archived)
^100% unofficial(
Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 9 Aug 2017, 19:50,
archived)
I've managed to make it to 2017 without finding out what fantasy football is,I'll thank you not to enlighten me now.
(
monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Wed 9 Aug 2017, 19:52,
archived)
Do you not have a life outside of B3ta?Surely there are enough fantasy overpaid babies tournaments out there without getting B3ta involved.
(
.Yeti. El amor en los tiempos del cólera, Wed 9 Aug 2017, 20:31,
archived)
How about fantasy mutually assured destruction(
drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Wed 9 Aug 2017, 20:55,
archived)
it will be the biggest and best destruction the world has ever seen, the bigliest
(
vladimir, Wed 9 Aug 2017, 21:02,
archived)
We’re going to die. We’re going to die so much. We’re going to die by Pyongyang nukes, we’re going to die by friendly fire.We’re going to die so much, you’re going to be so sick and tired of dying, you’re going to come to me and go, ‘Please, please, we can’t die any more.’
(
drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Wed 9 Aug 2017, 21:08,
archived)
is this where we pick a fantasy football team from board members? I sure hope so(
vladimir, Wed 9 Aug 2017, 21:00,
archived)
the fat chicks can be the cheerleaderswe'll have no body shaming around here, out and proud and on the pitch!
(
vladimir, Wed 9 Aug 2017, 21:29,
archived)
Haha hello there!My goodness, where I live, it's raining quite a bit! Haha, never mind, it's good for the garden! Haha, jolly good.
With all that in mind, what's the biggest thing YOU'VE put up your bum?
(
Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 9 Aug 2017, 15:22,
archived)
3 fingers and a thumb.(
Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Wed 9 Aug 2017, 15:24,
archived)
Cor, that must have been a struggleDid you go between the legs, or up over the back?
(
Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 9 Aug 2017, 15:43,
archived)
It wasn't my hand.(
Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Wed 9 Aug 2017, 15:43,
archived)
This was intended as an act of love, I assume?(
Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 9 Aug 2017, 15:45,
archived)
No. Real embarrassing bus stop accident(
Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Wed 9 Aug 2017, 15:46,
archived)
Did she kill you softlyWith her songs?
(
keybo was imtypingonakeyboard, now I'm not, Wed 9 Aug 2017, 15:39,
archived)
It's raining fair heft here too but I like a bit of a downpour now and then.Gets the old creative energies going and all that stuff.
As for the bum question, I don't think you have the clearance level for that information.
(
.Yeti. El amor en los tiempos del cólera, Wed 9 Aug 2017, 15:28,
archived)
Not as much as you might think(
Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 9 Aug 2017, 15:48,
archived)
So you can't fit two bags of funk in your one pound arse bag?(
keybo was imtypingonakeyboard, now I'm not, Wed 9 Aug 2017, 16:03,
archived)
No, I suppose not(
Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 9 Aug 2017, 16:12,
archived)
Family pack of Bernard Matthews Golden Drummers and a tin of baked beans(
broadsword w⚓, Wed 9 Aug 2017, 15:42,
archived)
I clicked I Like This on this postbecause i like it
(
Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Wed 9 Aug 2017, 16:58,
archived)
Anything not to pay for a carrier bag, eh(
keybo was imtypingonakeyboard, now I'm not, Wed 9 Aug 2017, 16:05,
archived)
200 Benson's and a clipper , make of that what you like (
mongychops, Wed 9 Aug 2017, 15:46,
archived)
say no more, brother(
Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 9 Aug 2017, 15:48,
archived)
the cutty sark is bigger than it looks i will tell you that...oh hahahaha, coz it was a tea clipper...get it...oh hahahaha(
mongychops, Wed 9 Aug 2017, 16:13,
archived)
I don't believe I've ever put anything up my bum (
Smash Monkey 2 The damp spastic, Wed 9 Aug 2017, 15:56,
archived)
A colony of rare and endangered pine martensget it? colony!
(
Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Wed 9 Aug 2017, 17:01,
archived)
Clear skies and sunshine in the East MidlandsMind you, I've never stuck anything up my arse, so I guess it's swings and roundabouts...
(
C, Wed 9 Aug 2017, 17:49,
archived)
Yeah, I'm a fucking car nerd and that is the absolute worst.(
Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Wed 9 Aug 2017, 12:48,
archived)
I did it because it's been nearly 20 years and I thought it would be socially responsible to catch upseems I need to bone up on hand signals.
(
Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Wed 9 Aug 2017, 12:52,
archived)
I got 50 out of 50 on the motorbike one.(
Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Wed 9 Aug 2017, 12:57,
archived)
brb, doing my lgv test(
The Doveston haunted by the memory of his own amnesia, Wed 9 Aug 2017, 12:49,
archived)
29 out of 50 :(:(:(:(:(:(:(:((
The Doveston haunted by the memory of his own amnesia, Wed 9 Aug 2017, 13:08,
archived)
only if you say his surname like a Street Fighter battle cry(
Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Wed 9 Aug 2017, 13:01,
archived)
What??? FUCKING WHAT?????pbs.twimg.com/media/DGqn6MMVYAA84Du.jpg:large
(
Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 9 Aug 2017, 13:22,
archived)
cad-comic.com/wp-content/uploads/2017/03/cad-20040515-37a02.jpg
(
$$ ✅, Wed 9 Aug 2017, 13:24,
archived)
Well yeah, that's funny(
Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Wed 9 Aug 2017, 13:25,
archived)
fucking FUCKING hell(
Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 9 Aug 2017, 13:28,
archived)
Oc? Opposite cunt?
(
Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Wed 9 Aug 2017, 13:25,
archived)
While 'opposite cunt' isn't entirely inaccurateI suspect it means 'original content'. But it still doesn't make any sense.
(
Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 9 Aug 2017, 13:29,
archived)
It probably means they make stuff they think is good,And actually it's shit and everyone tells them it's shit and it upsets them.
(
Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Wed 9 Aug 2017, 13:32,
archived)
So instead of focussing on creating something 'good'they make something just as shit, ABOUT how shit they are at what they do? My god, what a world.
(
Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 9 Aug 2017, 13:36,
archived)
It makes me want to shit (
Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Wed 9 Aug 2017, 13:38,
archived)
as web comics goit's no cumsprites
(
Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Wed 9 Aug 2017, 13:43,
archived)
It makes us want to shit(
Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 9 Aug 2017, 13:46,
archived)
Shit this www.joshuawright.net/images/picture%20-%20slackwyrm%20164.jpg?crc=16233871
(
Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Wed 9 Aug 2017, 14:04,
archived)
that's fucking shockingalso, I'm pretty sure Grrrmachine's real name is Wotan Whingemaster
(
Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 9 Aug 2017, 14:12,
archived)
although if we're doing nameshere's Richard's backstory
(
Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Wed 9 Aug 2017, 14:24,
archived)
10/10 www.watchuseek.com/quiz-do-you-really-know-your-rolex-watches/
(
mongychops, Wed 9 Aug 2017, 13:06,
archived)
6/10That was an interesting and informative quiz. Thanks Mongy.
(
Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Wed 9 Aug 2017, 13:13,
archived)
Went in a flight simulator once Let's all be thankful that I don't have a pilot's license
(
Smash Monkey 2 The damp spastic, Wed 9 Aug 2017, 13:42,
archived)
_____________
..---:::::::-----------. ::::;;.
.'"""""" ;; \ ":.
.'' ; \ "\__.
.' ;; ; \\";
.' ; _____; \\/
.' :; ;" \ ___:'.
.'--........................... : = ____:" \ \
..-"" """' o""" ; ; :
.--"" .----- ..----... _.- --. ..-" ; ; ; ;
.""_- "--""-----'"" _-" .-"" ; ; .-.
.' .' ." ." ; ; /. |
/-./' ." / _.. ; ; ;;;|
: ;-.______ / _________==. /_ \ ; ; ;;;;
; / | """"""""""".---.""""""" : /" ". |; ; _; ;;;
/"-/ | W 4 N K / / / / ;|; ;-" | ;';
:- : """----______ / / ____. . ."'. ;; .-"..T" .
'. " ___ "": '"""""""""""""" . ; ; ;; ;." ." '--"
", __ """ ""---... :- - - - - - - - - ' ' ; ; ; ;;" ."
/. ; """---___ ; ; ; ;|.""
: ": """----. .-------. ; ; ; ;:
\ '--__ \ \ \ / | ; ;;
'-.. """"---___ : .______..\ __/..-""| ; ; ;
""--.. """--" . ". . ;
""------... ..--"" " :
"""""""""""""""""" \ /
"------"
(
broadsword w⚓, Wed 9 Aug 2017, 14:00,
archived)
lol, 4 doorlike a peasant would drive
(
Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Wed 9 Aug 2017, 14:02,
archived)
Did you type that while falling off a cliff?(
drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Wed 9 Aug 2017, 14:50,
archived)
Clearly not(
Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Wed 9 Aug 2017, 10:48,
archived)
It would make an excellent title for a retro 80s-style beat-'em-up though.(
.Yeti. El amor en los tiempos del cólera, Wed 9 Aug 2017, 10:52,
archived)
I was thinking a similar thingExcept Fire & Fury are two female sub-bosses, right near the end of the game.
(
Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 9 Aug 2017, 11:46,
archived)
TROUBLE GUAM: TRUMP CHEWS OUT KIM(
Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 9 Aug 2017, 10:56,
archived)
That's good, thatMight send that to The Sun
(
Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 9 Aug 2017, 10:59,
archived)
dunno whether you're offering a D&D game, or a really hot curry(
Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Wed 9 Aug 2017, 10:53,
archived)
"A bit of fire and fury; the half-arsed fantasy novel taking the middle classes by storm"(
Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Wed 9 Aug 2017, 10:54,
archived)
staying in kerry, but gonna do some driving around(
The Doveston haunted by the memory of his own amnesia, Wed 9 Aug 2017, 11:05,
archived)
+ Katona
(
Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 9 Aug 2017, 11:08,
archived)
I could not agree with this more(
Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 9 Aug 2017, 11:10,
archived)
i'm a big fan of fat tits and cocaine(
The Doveston haunted by the memory of his own amnesia, Wed 9 Aug 2017, 11:10,
archived)
The Valley ladies must be right up your street then(
keybo was imtypingonakeyboard, now I'm not, Wed 9 Aug 2017, 11:27,
archived)
no i live in cardiff(
The Doveston haunted by the memory of his own amnesia, Wed 9 Aug 2017, 11:35,
archived)
*badum tssh*The sound of them falling off the train as they get there
(
keybo was imtypingonakeyboard, now I'm not, Wed 9 Aug 2017, 11:37,
archived)
Thing is, I'm not entirely convincedthat Trump doesn't realise that Kim Jung-Un isn't the fat one from 'How Clean Is Your House?'
(
Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 9 Aug 2017, 11:06,
archived)
oh, it's a Trump quote?he's a fucking nobber and no mistake
(
Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Wed 9 Aug 2017, 11:09,
archived)
Of course it isHe's a dribbling man-child, who doesn't realise that his comments now have consequences.
(
Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 9 Aug 2017, 11:11,
archived)
i was thinking about getting my hair done like kim jung un(
The Doveston haunted by the memory of his own amnesia, Wed 9 Aug 2017, 11:08,
archived)
you'll need to lose a bit of weight if you really want to look like him(
Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Wed 9 Aug 2017, 11:10,
archived)
why can't he just gain a bit more the selfish prick(
The Doveston haunted by the memory of his own amnesia, Wed 9 Aug 2017, 11:13,
archived)
he's perfect just the way he is(
Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Wed 9 Aug 2017, 11:15,
archived)
Is this post about heartburn?Because I don't want heartburn
(
keybo was imtypingonakeyboard, now I'm not, Wed 9 Aug 2017, 11:20,
archived)
This sort of thing?68.media.tumblr.com/0ff421687d68a890705c2f739b2171cb/tumblr_oqlf9z06nY1u8pvego1_1280.jpg
(
2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Wed 9 Aug 2017, 11:45,
archived)
Now, I don't normally do this sort of thing...but this is very much NSFW
(
Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 9 Aug 2017, 11:47,
archived)
Don't really see how an inside-out dog is NSFWUnless you find dogs sexy. Do you find dogs sexy?
(
2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Wed 9 Aug 2017, 11:51,
archived)
and chinese restaurant workers!(
Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Wed 9 Aug 2017, 12:17,
archived)
good griefpass the mind bleach
(
theniwokeup has been awake since, Wed 9 Aug 2017, 12:33,
archived)
Now THIS is what I call radical islami.imgur.com/vl0anyQ.gifv
(
Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 9 Aug 2017, 11:59,
archived)
wotcha mongythese clan noobs are shit
(
Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Wed 9 Aug 2017, 7:47,
archived)
yeah, they always are, i'm still losing so much that it is unplayable as i can't upgrade anything (
mongychops, Wed 9 Aug 2017, 7:53,
archived)
I'm hit TH11 on thursday10mil to upgrade anything at that point, load of bollocks
(
Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Wed 9 Aug 2017, 8:01,
archived)
+ up, everybody sayWhen you hear the call you've got to get it underway
(
Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Wed 9 Aug 2017, 8:02,
archived)
83 gpz 550 or a 88 650 transalp.(
Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Wed 9 Aug 2017, 8:22,
archived)
Transalp was a police bike, so it should be pretty goodbut the Kawasaki's got a bit more power and apparently a faster top speed, even though it's 30kg heavier. Tough call, are they the same price?
(
Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Wed 9 Aug 2017, 8:27,
archived)
Near enough yeah, similar mileage and condition. I'm leaning towards the transalp as it's a bit taller and the GPZ is a bit more tucked up
(
Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Wed 9 Aug 2017, 8:29,
archived)
If the transalp WAS a copper's bike (which wiki says it was)then it's probably the perfect mix of urban cruising and wanging it down the A roads, which I expect is what you want.
(
Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Wed 9 Aug 2017, 8:35,
archived)
Yeah, but they're butt ugly unless you get one of the silly ones with Honda colour fairing. (
Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Wed 9 Aug 2017, 8:36,
archived)
There are loads of GS650 and similar covered in stickers and done about 5000 miles around,From when that Charlie Boorman prick did "long way down" and every middle aged man bought one to go and have an adventure around the green lanes of their Cotswold village.
(
Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Wed 9 Aug 2017, 8:54,
archived)
yer, him and McGregor had done Long Way Round just before I did the Mongol Rallyquite a few blokes tried to follow their tracks through Russia and quickly worked out how much of that trip was utter bollocks
(
Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Wed 9 Aug 2017, 8:57,
archived)
Yup.They're no worse than all the pricks that go to Germany and take their shitty Audi round the nurburgring to get the sticker but never post a time better than about 10 minutes
(
Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Wed 9 Aug 2017, 8:59,
archived)
I might walk round it, and get the map tattooed on my backTime: 4 days 7 hours 14 minutes 12 seconds
(
Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 9 Aug 2017, 10:03,
archived)
To be fair, what I want is Honda CB500 four.But every stupid wanker seems to want to create weird cafe racer hybrid things, and so they're all cut up, single seated and 3 times the price.
I had an argument with a bloke because he called his bike a cafe racer and I pointed out the handlebars were above the top yoke so he's failed at task 1. A single seat and no fairing does not a cafe racer make.
(
Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Wed 9 Aug 2017, 8:34,
archived)
N.a., the 80s ones. Don't like the late 90s ones, tank is all wrong so under braking it squeezes your balls.(
Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Wed 9 Aug 2017, 8:57,
archived)
more like this? (smaller engine)
(
Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Wed 9 Aug 2017, 8:59,
archived)
Lovely bikes.I still want the 500 four though as you can put a lovely 4 in to 1 pipe in it and it sounds like armageddon
(
Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Wed 9 Aug 2017, 9:02,
archived)
yeah, they do look goodnow I've had a squizz, I can see what you mean about all this cafe racer bollocks
(
Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Wed 9 Aug 2017, 9:06,
archived)
Horrible nonsense.Lots of good classics getting ruined in my opinion.
(
Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Wed 9 Aug 2017, 9:07,
archived)
Same everywhereThe sort of BMW I have is popular among drifters, so any and all below a certain price point got bought up, thrashed and trashed. All that's done is driven the value of clean ones like mine through the roof, so it's worth 10x what I paid for it now.
(
Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Wed 9 Aug 2017, 9:10,
archived)
Well, that's good for you I guess.(
Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Wed 9 Aug 2017, 9:17,
archived)
meh, I still need to find a place to respray it againI made a pig's ear of it
(
Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Wed 9 Aug 2017, 9:34,
archived)
Morning.Last night, the Norse god of technology (who's probably a second cousin of Hephaestus or something) stood up from his office chair and loudly proclaimed "NO! Humans, you shall have no technology tonight!" And lo, my Bluetooth headphones would not connect, and the document alignment I was trying to do didn't work, and they fecked around with the inbox system on Reddit and turned it into something totally unworkable. Jt's back to normal this morning.
(
.Yeti. El amor en los tiempos del cólera, Wed 9 Aug 2017, 8:19,
archived)
It was aligning a source document with the translation and I tried MemoQ at first, which made a right pig's ear of it.Then I ran the docs through Wordfast's free online aligner and it worked twenty times better and more quickly. So that was perhaps the only technological success from last night.
(
.Yeti. El amor en los tiempos del cólera, Wed 9 Aug 2017, 8:47,
archived)
not used MemoQ in yonks, I stuck with Omega because it was free/cheapbut they're not really tools for page layouts, are they?
(
Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Wed 9 Aug 2017, 8:57,
archived)
No, but I was just trying to build a TM anyway.It just made me laugh (quietly) that the pro version of MemoQ couldn't figure out that two segments clearly had nothing to do with each other when a free web tool worked it out no problem. Ideally I'd go back to working with Wordfast Classic full-time instead of having to faff around with tags but the market has moved on.
(
.Yeti. El amor en los tiempos del cólera, Wed 9 Aug 2017, 9:10,
archived)
yer, I'm horrendously out of date with that stuff now tooGlad I'm out of the game tbh, too many dickheads pumping text through Google Translate and then trying to ask for a proofreading rate rather than a full translation price. Fucking chancers.
(
Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Wed 9 Aug 2017, 9:11,
archived)
They're tearing the arse out of the market alright.I'm glad I'm not freelancing it any more either. Like you say, too many agencies running their texts through machine translation and asking you to 'final-eye' it or some other bullshit term, or asking you to pay for a second proofreader for your own work because it's the first time you're working with them. Chancers is right.
(
.Yeti. El amor en los tiempos del cólera, Wed 9 Aug 2017, 9:24,
archived)
chinny wolverine anecdote(
drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Wed 9 Aug 2017, 8:52,
archived)
hiyagoing to ireland for a bit tomorrow, hopefully the uk is nuked while i'm there
(
The Doveston haunted by the memory of his own amnesia, Wed 9 Aug 2017, 9:44,
archived)
any bits in particular?or do you just want to see Woman Pees Herself In Street?
(
Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Wed 9 Aug 2017, 9:57,
archived)
I thought that was in Brussels.(
.Yeti. El amor en los tiempos del cólera, Wed 9 Aug 2017, 10:01,
archived)
not everything's in brussels, you know(
Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 9 Aug 2017, 10:14,
archived)
That's true. I'm not in Brussels, and neither are you.It does feature a boy, a girl and a dog peeing in the street though.
(
.Yeti. El amor en los tiempos del cólera, Wed 9 Aug 2017, 10:30,
archived)
so does ur mum's face, m8(
Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 9 Aug 2017, 10:41,
archived)
Sorry Tony hawk, i don't think your fridge will save you from the fallout irl.(, Wed 9 Aug 2017, 10:03, archived)
YOU'RE a plural form(
Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 9 Aug 2017, 10:09,
archived)
MorningJust got back from the park - went to see what Pokemon Go raids are all about. Unfortunately, while it looks interesting, I'm not sure that hanging round with a bunch of eleven year olds in a park would be positive for the reputation of a man of my advanced years - although it hadn't stopped a few creepy 40 something neckbeards from doing just that...
(
C, Wed 9 Aug 2017, 10:35,
archived)
^ 13th Duke of Wybourne(
.Yeti. El amor en los tiempos del cólera, Wed 9 Aug 2017, 10:37,
archived)
I walked past the nearby underground station the other dayand saw a load of people clustered in a circle all tapping away at their phones. It looked like a bizarre nerd ritual to summon a girl who'd actually have sex with them.
(
Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Wed 9 Aug 2017, 10:37,
archived)
I heard a story about a local nerd who met and had sex with a real girl while playing Pokemon Go - probably just an urban myth though.
(
C, Wed 9 Aug 2017, 10:46,
archived)
bit quiet for a weekday isn't it, oh dear(
Major Turd for tonight only, Wed 9 Aug 2017, 2:54,
archived)
Much like Shrove Tuesday, I forgot and cooked a normal dinner.(
Slippery Mick ‏, Tue 8 Aug 2017, 23:58,
archived)
Seems like I've got Whooping CoughIn what ways do you resemble a 19th century peasant?
(
Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Tue 8 Aug 2017, 12:13,
archived)
I don't expect to live into my 50's(
Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Tue 8 Aug 2017, 12:15,
archived)
You're not already 50? (
Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Tue 8 Aug 2017, 12:30,
archived)
*mouths 'fuck you'*(
Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Tue 8 Aug 2017, 12:31,
archived)
move that s from the end of word 1 to the end of word 2because there's no fun html way to write that
(
manolith hooray for me, Tue 8 Aug 2017, 12:39,
archived)
I throw my shit out of the window into the street(
Major Turd for tonight only, Tue 8 Aug 2017, 12:16,
archived)
I regularly pop my winky up Lady Chatterley's chuff(
broadsword w⚓, Tue 8 Aug 2017, 12:21,
archived)
I'd rather have Spinning Jenny than Typhoid Mary.(
.Yeti. El amor en los tiempos del cólera, Tue 8 Aug 2017, 12:22,
archived)
the fruit flavoured ones get too sticky(
Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Tue 8 Aug 2017, 12:28,
archived)
Do they still make fruit polo? (
Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Tue 8 Aug 2017, 12:29,
archived)
because i'm a bird in the genus phasianidae and am often hunted for sportoh... peasant. soz
(
manolith hooray for me, Tue 8 Aug 2017, 12:44,
archived)
hahahahahornithology
(
Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Tue 8 Aug 2017, 12:49,
archived)
*points at pheasants*(
Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Tue 8 Aug 2017, 13:07,
archived)
I haev a long neck and I pick fish out of the water w/ my beak. If you dont repost this comment on 10 other pages, I will fly into your kitchen tonight and make a mess of your pots and pans.
(
2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Tue 8 Aug 2017, 14:46,
archived)
i would vote for jacob rees mogg(
The Doveston haunted by the memory of his own amnesia, Tue 8 Aug 2017, 13:28,
archived)
depends what he was running forIf he was on Strictly I'd vote for him
(
Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Tue 8 Aug 2017, 13:29,
archived)
can't wait for strictly, i wonder who will be on it this year???!!!(
The Doveston haunted by the memory of his own amnesia, Tue 8 Aug 2017, 13:30,
archived)
it'll be me, m8(
Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Tue 8 Aug 2017, 13:31,
archived)
how do i get a refund on my bbc licence fee?(
The Doveston haunted by the memory of his own amnesia, Tue 8 Aug 2017, 13:42,
archived)
You need to join ISIS(
Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Tue 8 Aug 2017, 13:43,
archived)
not another membership fee(
The Doveston haunted by the memory of his own amnesia, Tue 8 Aug 2017, 13:47,
archived)
I'm afraid soIt's a one off payment, though
(
Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Tue 8 Aug 2017, 13:49,
archived)
says the noir-films-and-asian-cooking afficiondo.(
Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Tue 8 Aug 2017, 14:00,
archived)
So one was based on pulp novella's and the other was often a way for traditionally poor people to preserve their food.(
Slippery Mick ‏, Tue 8 Aug 2017, 14:40,
archived)
learn that in your guardian supplement, did you?(
Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Tue 8 Aug 2017, 14:52,
archived)
I rewerse all my vs and ws(
drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Tue 8 Aug 2017, 14:09,
archived)
Some Dickens character, can't remember which book now(
drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Tue 8 Aug 2017, 14:26,
archived)
i have had pleurisyand i sweep with a brush rather than hoover
(
Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Tue 8 Aug 2017, 14:15,
archived)
I sweep with a brush about half the time. Usually when I've left the hoover upstairs and there's dust downstairs. It also seems to be more effective against cat litter.
@anecdoteking.
(
.Yeti. El amor en los tiempos del cólera, Tue 8 Aug 2017, 14:20,
archived)
i've only got one small rugthe rest is cushioned flooring, so sweeping is easier and quicker than getting a hoover out, untangling the wire and plugging it in
(
Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Tue 8 Aug 2017, 14:22,
archived)
Cushioned flooring?I'm imagining the floor of your house as one giant cushion now. It's one way to make sure you never hurt yourself when you fall over again.
(
.Yeti. El amor en los tiempos del cólera, Tue 8 Aug 2017, 14:27,
archived)
it's like thick linowarmer than the older stuff, though. i've got most of it done parquet style, but the kitchen is black and white victorian tile
(
Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Tue 8 Aug 2017, 14:36,
archived)
Noice.I'm so glad that carpet is pretty much unheard-of in France. Makes dusting/hoovering a damn sight easier.
(
.Yeti. El amor en los tiempos del cólera, Tue 8 Aug 2017, 14:49,
archived)
never really seen good parts of france, just motorwaysand paris, but that was for one weekend and it's tourist central
(
Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Tue 8 Aug 2017, 14:53,
archived)
At least you can confirm that French motorways aren't carpeted.(
.Yeti. El amor en los tiempos del cólera, Tue 8 Aug 2017, 15:07,
archived)
I imagined it to be like that 'squidgy tarmac' they put in playgrounds after woodchips were deemed to dangerous.(
Slippery Mick ‏, Tue 8 Aug 2017, 14:59,
archived)
i love that stuff(
Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Tue 8 Aug 2017, 15:06,
archived)
no-one wants to hear about your pubic topiary, m8e(
manolith hooray for me, Tue 8 Aug 2017, 14:30,
archived)
that's good, it's pretty unimportan(
Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Tue 8 Aug 2017, 14:35,
archived)
I had pleurisy last year*lung inflammation FIVES*
(
broadsword w⚓, Tue 8 Aug 2017, 14:55,
archived)
*horks up a lung*(
Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Tue 8 Aug 2017, 15:07,
archived)
In what ways do you resemble a 19th century peasant?
(
manolith hooray for me, Tue 8 Aug 2017, 14:51,
archived)
morningbecause i'll actually reply, unlike that prick
(
Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Tue 8 Aug 2017, 7:11,
archived)
I'm alrighter than a nuremberg rally m8(
Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Tue 8 Aug 2017, 7:38,
archived)
I'm morninger than a funeral director convention m8(
Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Tue 8 Aug 2017, 7:39,
archived)
I've got more tits than a suburban birdtable m8(
Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Tue 8 Aug 2017, 8:05,
archived)
Cor*trouseral enstiffening embiggifies*
(
.Yeti. El amor en los tiempos del cólera, Tue 8 Aug 2017, 8:09,
archived)
Now there's a filename straight out of Limewire.(
.Yeti. El amor en los tiempos del cólera, Tue 8 Aug 2017, 8:55,
archived)
You betchaHad two this morning for breakfast
(
keybo was imtypingonakeyboard, now I'm not, Tue 8 Aug 2017, 9:43,
archived)
international date feline(
drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Tue 8 Aug 2017, 9:46,
archived)
oh so that's how it is, is it?(
Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Tue 8 Aug 2017, 8:50,
archived)
My brake light switch broke yesterday. I wondered why the chap behind me was flashing his lights and waving a lot.Bit awkward as it was on the way to the MOT. Still passed somehow. Not sure Wheeler did a comprehensive check.
(
Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Tue 8 Aug 2017, 8:59,
archived)
yer, that's a big suspicious innitdid you buy him a drink as thanks?
(
Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Tue 8 Aug 2017, 9:02,
archived)
I took him a bottle of wine, he doesn't drink beer. I decided not to ask him about it, I know the bike is mostly alright.
(
Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Tue 8 Aug 2017, 9:04,
archived)
oh shit, it's the modsscarper lads
(
Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Tue 8 Aug 2017, 9:11,
archived)
it's alright, i've been corrupted absolutely(
manolith hooray for me, Tue 8 Aug 2017, 9:21,
archived)
I suppose you could call it that(
Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Tue 8 Aug 2017, 9:45,
archived)
Deep downWe are all pricks.
(
keybo was imtypingonakeyboard, now I'm not, Tue 8 Aug 2017, 9:43,
archived)
Wish I could remix gospel records and live off the royalties(
keybo was imtypingonakeyboard, now I'm not, Tue 8 Aug 2017, 9:58,
archived)
well that's a bold new approach on an old favourite(
Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Tue 8 Aug 2017, 10:06,
archived)
morningsince I'm going to bed now what happens today is entirely up to you
(
Woodkovsky ☹️➝🚻➝🚽➝😣➝💩➝🧻➝😁, Tue 8 Aug 2017, 7:07,
archived)
« Older messages | Newer messages »