It's shit on here today.
Why are you so shit?
( GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Fri 26 Jan 2018, 15:25, archived)

You keep rubbing off on me.
You heard what that policeman said last time.
( .Yeti. El amor en los tiempos del cólera, Fri 26 Jan 2018, 15:32, archived)

Tong Poo

( $$ ✅, Fri 26 Jan 2018, 15:33, archived)

Nah m8 you've just got shit on your glasses

( 2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Fri 26 Jan 2018, 15:39, archived)

i'm not shit, i'm a cunt, there's a difference

( Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Fri 26 Jan 2018, 15:54, archived)

no u

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 26 Jan 2018, 15:55, archived)

Ive spent the day scrabbling for a new Drag Race link.
Finally found one on the facebooks and am currently downloading.

Work has been pretty yawn.
They're so lucky to have me.
( GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Fri 26 Jan 2018, 16:04, archived)

I'm not at my best in January

( willenium Fist bump for verification, Fri 26 Jan 2018, 17:36, archived)

Ill-advised 10cc, Tina Turner and Barbara Dickson zzzzz

( drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Fri 26 Jan 2018, 18:00, archived)

It's times like these that I miss Frank's "wanky wanky wank" threads
What do you miss?
( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Fri 26 Jan 2018, 13:09, archived)

the point

( manolith hooray for me, Fri 26 Jan 2018, 13:10, archived)

the pointer sisters

( $$ ✅, Fri 26 Jan 2018, 13:11, archived)

b3ta

( Cheers Cheers, Fri 26 Jan 2018, 13:13, archived)

Cheers

( $$ ✅, Fri 26 Jan 2018, 13:13, archived)

Cheers

( Cheers Cheers, Fri 26 Jan 2018, 13:15, archived)

behave

( .Yeti. El amor en los tiempos del cólera, Fri 26 Jan 2018, 13:20, archived)

the sopranos

( $$ ✅, Fri 26 Jan 2018, 13:25, archived)

wanking into a cocked hat

( $$ ✅, Fri 26 Jan 2018, 13:26, archived)

Boris Johnson's great-great-... nan who died in 1787 has been identified in Basel
#nobodycares
( Woodkovsky ☹️➝🚻➝🚽➝😣➝💩➝🧻➝😁, Fri 26 Jan 2018, 13:53, archived)

bloke from famous family related to famous person from the past
I'm more concerned that the church lost track of who's buried under the floors.
( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Fri 26 Jan 2018, 14:08, archived)

all of these things:
www.b3ta.com/search/posts/68951?q=i+miss
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 26 Jan 2018, 14:25, archived)

the simple life...

( GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Fri 26 Jan 2018, 14:50, archived)

with Paris and Nicole

( GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Fri 26 Jan 2018, 14:51, archived)

my belly button

( Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Fri 26 Jan 2018, 15:56, archived)

0/7, u?
www.bbc.co.uk/news/stories-42820884
( broadsword w⚓, Fri 26 Jan 2018, 12:28, archived)

2/7
Why the fuck would dementia sufferers need a disabled badge for their cars?
( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Fri 26 Jan 2018, 12:32, archived)

Fucking useful for carers of people with dementia

( broadsword w⚓, Fri 26 Jan 2018, 12:39, archived)

well those pricks can park at the other end of the carpark like normal people

( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Fri 26 Jan 2018, 12:49, archived)

in case they forget they have a condition

( sock more tea vicar?, Fri 26 Jan 2018, 12:43, archived)

3/7

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Fri 26 Jan 2018, 12:39, archived)

good effoty

( broadsword w⚓, Fri 26 Jan 2018, 12:41, archived)

effort even

( broadsword w⚓, Fri 26 Jan 2018, 12:41, archived)

I liked effoty

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Fri 26 Jan 2018, 12:42, archived)

playing football on pills

( broadsword w⚓, Fri 26 Jan 2018, 12:45, archived)

5 my good man

( $$ ✅, Fri 26 Jan 2018, 12:49, archived)

Top hole old bean

( broadsword w⚓, Fri 26 Jan 2018, 12:54, archived)

"On the Bench" Your score: 3/7

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 26 Jan 2018, 12:55, archived)

on the bench like the dirty whore you are

( $$ ✅, Fri 26 Jan 2018, 13:02, archived)

it's mumsnet slang

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 26 Jan 2018, 13:07, archived)

?/7, quiz doesn't load.

( .Yeti. El amor en los tiempos del cólera, Fri 26 Jan 2018, 12:55, archived)

2

( GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Fri 26 Jan 2018, 12:57, archived)

i got 5 on it
grab your 40, let's get keyed
( manolith hooray for me, Fri 26 Jan 2018, 13:10, archived)

I'm up for getting keyed

( $$ ✅, Fri 26 Jan 2018, 13:11, archived)

morning

( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Fri 26 Jan 2018, 7:12, archived)

Took the bandit in to work this morning,
Was behind my boss for a bit so I did the sensible thing, dropped a cog and shot off past him like a hooligan
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Fri 26 Jan 2018, 7:17, archived)

nice
wouldn't try that here, it's sheet ice everywhere. Reckon you'll keep this bike for a bit?
( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Fri 26 Jan 2018, 7:22, archived)

Yeah, I really like it.
Keep it as a rider and get a proper old banger, maybe a matchless or something. There was a Ural on that site you got the tank for Chris from, with a sidecar for about 500 quid. Tempted to take a van over and get a couple of cheap classics.
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Fri 26 Jan 2018, 7:27, archived)

The Dnieprs with sidecars are cheap as chips here
but there's loads of local brands too. And this tidy little Jawa
( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Fri 26 Jan 2018, 7:42, archived)

I wonder if I could fly over and ride something back.

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Fri 26 Jan 2018, 8:02, archived)

Are you sure you want to do 1000+ miles on a bike you don't know?
But the drive itself is a piece of piss. You'd want the country route though - motorways would be terrifying.
( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Fri 26 Jan 2018, 8:06, archived)

Be an adventure.
As long as I get insured and some breakdown cover.
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Fri 26 Jan 2018, 8:15, archived)

cog and shot guff
( drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Fri 26 Jan 2018, 8:02, archived)

which bandit do you have?

( sock more tea vicar?, Fri 26 Jan 2018, 8:06, archived)

The arse 1200

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 26 Jan 2018, 8:12, archived)

pfffft!

( sock more tea vicar?, Fri 26 Jan 2018, 8:14, archived)

Naked 600

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Fri 26 Jan 2018, 8:15, archived)

verr nice, i had one years ago, the original one that is
got a 1200 at one point too, beast of a machine
( sock more tea vicar?, Fri 26 Jan 2018, 8:17, archived)

You shit in the road?

( GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Fri 26 Jan 2018, 9:12, archived)

Happy Straya day

( mongychops, Fri 26 Jan 2018, 7:58, archived)

Fuck 'em, cunts

( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Fri 26 Jan 2018, 8:00, archived)

Typical abo

( mongychops, Fri 26 Jan 2018, 8:08, archived)

fuck off, bogan

( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Fri 26 Jan 2018, 8:14, archived)

Morning.
Internet's on the fritz here, for the second day in a row. Ten seconds on, thirty seconds off, rinse and repeat.

The tram driver this morning also had the lovely idea of sharing his shitty gangsta rap with the whole carriage.
( .Yeti. El amor en los tiempos del cólera, Fri 26 Jan 2018, 8:21, archived)

that's what you get for living in a shithole country

( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Fri 26 Jan 2018, 8:27, archived)

^ pot

( .Yeti. El amor en los tiempos del cólera, Fri 26 Jan 2018, 8:38, archived)

I haven't had to piss into a bucket due to infrastructure failure all winter!
this place is on its way up
( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Fri 26 Jan 2018, 8:49, archived)

actually, it wasn't that shit
this morning
( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Fri 26 Jan 2018, 9:09, archived)

pastuszka ostrzezenie

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 26 Jan 2018, 9:24, archived)

b3ta can't display z-with-a-dot

( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Fri 26 Jan 2018, 9:26, archived)

fucking useless site
I'm leaving na zawsze
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 26 Jan 2018, 9:28, archived)

"for ewa" might have been a better joke m7+1
especially if it's this Ewa
( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Fri 26 Jan 2018, 9:34, archived)

Happy Liberation Day to our Ugandan boarders

( $$ ✅, Fri 26 Jan 2018, 8:22, archived)

More Uganda facts pls

( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Fri 26 Jan 2018, 8:29, archived)

I think they are the second highest alcohol consumers in Africa
but I can't be arsed to check
( $$ ✅, Fri 26 Jan 2018, 8:46, archived)

I'm more of a The Gambia fan.

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Fri 26 Jan 2018, 8:35, archived)

well gay

( $$ ✅, Fri 26 Jan 2018, 8:47, archived)

I don't care if Windy's blue,
Yeti's gay and grrry too,
mcbeef always stinks of poo,
it's Friday I'm in love
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 26 Jan 2018, 8:52, archived)

the better Smith survived

( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Fri 26 Jan 2018, 8:56, archived)

I wonder if Elena Poulou wants a shoulder to cry on

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 26 Jan 2018, 9:08, archived)

lol poo loo

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 26 Jan 2018, 9:09, archived)

Hi

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Fri 26 Jan 2018, 9:00, archived)

hey hun hru? xx

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 26 Jan 2018, 9:09, archived)

I've got a wet crotch.

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Fri 26 Jan 2018, 9:13, archived)

alright mark e smith
pbs.twimg.com/media/CPXi1gEWUAATMW5.jpg
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 26 Jan 2018, 9:30, archived)

Why is he dressed like a retired policeman?

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Fri 26 Jan 2018, 9:32, archived)

Alright there, Adrian Mole.

( .Yeti. El amor en los tiempos del cólera, Fri 26 Jan 2018, 9:59, archived)

I'm not at work, today.
Woo, and indeed, yay.
( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Fri 26 Jan 2018, 8:57, archived)

in what nerdarrific way will you spend your free time?

( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Fri 26 Jan 2018, 8:58, archived)

Attaching bikes to the car and packing for a weekend at Centre Parcs.
Got my eye on setting up a pi-hole, but that'll have to wait.
( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Fri 26 Jan 2018, 9:04, archived)

it's the only hole you're likely to get this weekend m8

( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Fri 26 Jan 2018, 9:06, archived)

you're not up on the codes here
www.mumsnet.com/Talk/mumsnet_classics/a1385104-Center-Parcs-Anal-sex
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 26 Jan 2018, 9:10, archived)

wanna do some Center Parcs later?

( $$ ✅, Fri 26 Jan 2018, 9:14, archived)

yeah ok

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 26 Jan 2018, 9:21, archived)

cool
I'll nip over to Tescos and get some vegan friendly lubricant
( $$ ✅, Fri 26 Jan 2018, 9:29, archived)

"woman upset that husband wants sex with her" shocker

( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Fri 26 Jan 2018, 9:15, archived)

my friday is red and has podka dots on :)

( broadsword w⚓, Fri 26 Jan 2018, 9:41, archived)

wanna play?

( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Fri 26 Jan 2018, 9:43, archived)

Ha, turns out I have no idea how to do long division!
I think technology has rendered everything I've ever learnt completely obsolete.
( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Thu 25 Jan 2018, 19:05, archived)

What?

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Thu 25 Jan 2018, 19:14, archived)

I'm thicker than an 11 year old.
I tried to help the 9 year old with his homework, but failed hard. 11 year old whizzed through it.
( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Thu 25 Jan 2018, 19:22, archived)

Ha. Wanker

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Thu 25 Jan 2018, 19:24, archived)

At least I'm best at that.

( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Thu 25 Jan 2018, 20:10, archived)

through all over
( drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Thu 25 Jan 2018, 21:20, archived)

'you won't always have a calculator in your pocket you know'.

( Slippery Mick ‏, Thu 25 Jan 2018, 19:17, archived)

They said that then, but time has proven them very, very wrong.

( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Thu 25 Jan 2018, 19:18, archived)

Can't play bass, can't play drums, can't play anything

( mongychops, Thu 25 Jan 2018, 19:25, archived)

you have time to learn new things until u die, meyt

( Woodkovsky ☹️➝🚻➝🚽➝😣➝💩➝🧻➝😁, Thu 25 Jan 2018, 21:23, archived)

To be fair,
no-one aged older than nine has ever had to do long division.
( .Yeti. El amor en los tiempos del cólera, Thu 25 Jan 2018, 21:22, archived)

I imagine the school day now consists of a teacher bellowing at the class "just ask google the answer" over and over for 5 hours straight.

( drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Thu 25 Jan 2018, 21:24, archived)

That'd certainly make my life easier.

( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Thu 25 Jan 2018, 21:41, archived)

hey

( $$ ✅, Thu 25 Jan 2018, 13:15, archived)

yo

( broadsword w⚓, Thu 25 Jan 2018, 13:19, archived)

hey

( $$ ✅, Thu 25 Jan 2018, 13:20, archived)

*generic greeting*

( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Thu 25 Jan 2018, 13:20, archived)

hey

( $$ ✅, Thu 25 Jan 2018, 13:20, archived)

he'

( .Yeti. El amor en los tiempos del cólera, Thu 25 Jan 2018, 13:21, archived)

+y

( $$ ✅, Thu 25 Jan 2018, 13:21, archived)

Aho

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Thu 25 Jan 2018, 13:24, archived)

+y, hey

( $$ ✅, Thu 25 Jan 2018, 13:24, archived)

Yo

( Smash Monkey 2 The damp spastic, Thu 25 Jan 2018, 13:24, archived)

hey

( $$ ✅, Thu 25 Jan 2018, 13:25, archived)

Dolla dolla

( H.B.Mupps, Thu 25 Jan 2018, 13:27, archived)

holla

( $$ ✅, Thu 25 Jan 2018, 13:28, archived)

been trying to meet you

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 25 Jan 2018, 13:30, archived)

68.media.tumblr.com/7fb55216c2fcbcca8f8d25d0168fe32e/tumblr_p2yjqshf7e1s52q75o1_1280.jpg
( $$ ✅, Thu 25 Jan 2018, 13:35, archived)

img.buzzfeed.com/buzzfeed-static/static/enhanced/webdr03/2013/9/16/14/anigif_enhanced-buzz-1592-1379356669-18.gif
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 25 Jan 2018, 13:53, archived)

jimmy hill!

( $$ ✅, Thu 25 Jan 2018, 13:55, archived)

hmm

( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Thu 25 Jan 2018, 13:54, archived)

it's about jews ruling the world

( $$ ✅, Thu 25 Jan 2018, 13:55, archived)

Oh!
Well in that case, it's very funny
( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Thu 25 Jan 2018, 13:55, archived)

I don't find the show funny either to be fair
rich guy with a nice place can't get a woman? His dad should have killed him
( $$ ✅, Thu 25 Jan 2018, 13:58, archived)

*gropes*

( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Thu 25 Jan 2018, 13:32, archived)

do it properly
I want to feel violated not lightly brushed
( $$ ✅, Thu 25 Jan 2018, 13:36, archived)

I'm making sure to grab a handful.

( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Thu 25 Jan 2018, 14:10, archived)

what's going on?

( 2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Thu 25 Jan 2018, 13:57, archived)

fuck all

( $$ ✅, Thu 25 Jan 2018, 14:00, archived)

hu

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Thu 25 Jan 2018, 14:01, archived)

how r u?

( $$ ✅, Thu 25 Jan 2018, 14:02, archived)

HEY
YOU
YOU
I DONT LIKE YOUR GUUUURLFRIIIEEEND
( GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Thu 25 Jan 2018, 15:43, archived)

Morning

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Thu 25 Jan 2018, 7:13, archived)

Undeniably.

( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Thu 25 Jan 2018, 7:19, archived)

Were you a fan of The Fall?

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Thu 25 Jan 2018, 7:23, archived)

No.
I'm indifferent to the passing of Mr Smith.
( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Thu 25 Jan 2018, 8:46, archived)

yeah bish

( $$ ✅, Thu 25 Jan 2018, 7:24, archived)

I've got a slow day today.
Might spend loads of time posting here and guffing
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Thu 25 Jan 2018, 7:32, archived)

ayooooo

( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Thu 25 Jan 2018, 7:43, archived)

Eat yourself better

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Thu 25 Jan 2018, 8:01, archived)

Melt yourself down m8
( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Thu 25 Jan 2018, 8:16, archived)

Morning chaps

( H.B.Mupps, Thu 25 Jan 2018, 7:54, archived)

What about the lady boarders

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Thu 25 Jan 2018, 8:02, archived)

A massive, steaming cup of wh'appen to you.

( .Yeti. El amor en los tiempos del cólera, Thu 25 Jan 2018, 8:18, archived)

Uh, hi.

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Thu 25 Jan 2018, 8:21, archived)

it sure is

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 25 Jan 2018, 8:38, archived)

There He is

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Thu 25 Jan 2018, 8:44, archived)

freaking out, m8
freaking out
( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Thu 25 Jan 2018, 8:45, archived)

I'm here for you

( $$ ✅, Thu 25 Jan 2018, 8:48, archived)

thx bb

( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Thu 25 Jan 2018, 8:57, archived)

That Graham Coxon record was diabolical.
How is the hpuse thing?
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Thu 25 Jan 2018, 8:48, archived)

freak-worthy, m8
Finding out today (very long story short) whether or not I can actually buy the place. If we don't exchange by tomorrow, it may all fall through. Hence, 'freaking'.
TL;DR - My bank are being unreasonable, unhelpful cunts, and may ruin it all and make the last 9 months a waste of everyone's time.
( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Thu 25 Jan 2018, 8:57, archived)

When I bought my place I had to run between the bank, the lawyer's office and the land registry all on the same day
Finally got to the land registry to deposit the contract, and they informed me that the bank had cocked up the paperwork. And if it wasn't resolved in the next 45mins, the legal contract was void, the bank transfer to the seller would fail, and we'd lose all rights to our 20% deposit and have to pay all the legal fees again (another 10%).

That afternoon was a frantic series of taxi rides between offices, and a diamond was shat out afterwards.
( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Thu 25 Jan 2018, 9:05, archived)

yikes

( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Thu 25 Jan 2018, 9:08, archived)

yer, I've not had stress levels like that since
We actually got back to the land registry after they'd officially closed, but the nice lady let us put the corrected stuff in the appropriate IN tray and gave us the stamped receipt as proof. That little slip of paper was worth about 36 grand.
( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Thu 25 Jan 2018, 9:12, archived)

I'm sure there's a fortnight-long training module followed by all aspiring bankers
called "Ignoring what clients ask you to do and just doing whatever the fuck you want".
( .Yeti. El amor en los tiempos del cólera, Thu 25 Jan 2018, 9:08, archived)

In my case, they've left it until the last possible minute to question something that requires answers from several different people
1 week to go? Let's ask a week's worth of questions, and REALLY make them sweat. Cunts.
( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Thu 25 Jan 2018, 9:32, archived)

:(

(Roger McGough-Pipe, Thu 25 Jan 2018, 9:53, archived)

Yes, the daylight kind of gives it away

( Smash Monkey 2 The damp spastic, Thu 25 Jan 2018, 9:46, archived)

You're smart enough to figure this out, some of these folks are a bit...

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Thu 25 Jan 2018, 10:05, archived)

Well, quite

( Smash Monkey 2 The damp spastic, Thu 25 Jan 2018, 10:55, archived)

This thread is mark e smith.

( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Thu 25 Jan 2018, 11:03, archived)

It's that time again: it's time for a new thread.
Everyone having a lovely day so far? I'm off to my second-round interview in about an hour and a half. I'm feeling mildly excited.

Alt: which vintage series should be revived as a film?
( .Yeti. El amor en los tiempos del cólera, Wed 24 Jan 2018, 13:24, archived)

Last of the summer wine

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Wed 24 Jan 2018, 13:27, archived)

directed by Michael Bay

( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Wed 24 Jan 2018, 14:55, archived)

who also did the video for Meatloaf's "I would do anything for love", fact fans

( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Wed 24 Jan 2018, 14:55, archived)

c
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 24 Jan 2018, 14:58, archived)

He's doing Duke Nukem I think

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Wed 24 Jan 2018, 15:04, archived)

It still can't be worse than Doom, Win Pug.
Him what did that one should have taken lessons from Micheal Bay.
( stuj (^(^;;^)^) GO TEAM SPIDERS!(^(^;;^)^), Wed 24 Jan 2018, 15:30, archived)

Him what directed Pirates Of The Caribbean also did the video for Bad Religion's American Jesus.

( stuj (^(^;;^)^) GO TEAM SPIDERS!(^(^;;^)^), Wed 24 Jan 2018, 15:28, archived)

The dead gordon kaye show

( drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Wed 24 Jan 2018, 13:32, archived)

Helga, phwoar eh lads
lads eh
( drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Wed 24 Jan 2018, 13:33, archived)

Married to Christopher Nolan's uncle, or something.

( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Wed 24 Jan 2018, 14:05, archived)

I saw him live on stage doing 'Allo 'Allo once.

( .Yeti. El amor en los tiempos del cólera, Wed 24 Jan 2018, 13:40, archived)

The recent revisit was pretty tragic

( drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Wed 24 Jan 2018, 13:41, archived)

Most recent revisits are.
Blade Runner 2049 notwithstanding.
( .Yeti. El amor en los tiempos del cólera, Wed 24 Jan 2018, 13:41, archived)

Ulysses fucken 31

( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 24 Jan 2018, 13:33, archived)

AS LIFELESS AS STONE

( drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Wed 24 Jan 2018, 13:34, archived)

There were several france-japan cartoon collaborations in the 80s and 90s
This one, I assume the french contribution was "give the hero a ginger mullet"
( drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Wed 24 Jan 2018, 13:37, archived)

I might be tempted to watch that if they did a decent job of that.
Ulysses 31 was pretty dark for a kids' cartoon, if memory serves.
( .Yeti. El amor en los tiempos del cólera, Wed 24 Jan 2018, 13:37, archived)

My lot decried it as "boring",
so I've disinherited them all.
( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Wed 24 Jan 2018, 14:06, archived)

Heresy.
People just don't know what's good any more.
( .Yeti. El amor en los tiempos del cólera, Wed 24 Jan 2018, 14:19, archived)

This guy has remastered episodes for the entire series:
https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCvFPrBUObbOwkmwe5LmNKqA
( Cheers Cheers, Wed 24 Jan 2018, 15:05, archived)

the mash report

( $$ ✅, Wed 24 Jan 2018, 13:34, archived)

Bodger and badger was shit m8

( drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Wed 24 Jan 2018, 13:40, archived)

I watched that, last night.
The delay between the jokes and the audience laughter was very telling.
( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Wed 24 Jan 2018, 14:08, archived)

goggletoilet

( 2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Wed 24 Jan 2018, 14:03, archived)

u wot m8?

( .Yeti. El amor en los tiempos del cólera, Wed 24 Jan 2018, 14:07, archived)

They could get Ryan Reynolds to play the toilet.

( 2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Wed 24 Jan 2018, 14:17, archived)

You get to watch people as they watch someone else taking a shit?

( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Wed 24 Jan 2018, 14:10, archived)

Yeah it's a bit like those Youtube reaction videos only with more BAFTAs.

( 2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Wed 24 Jan 2018, 14:16, archived)

Benji, Zax, and the Alien Prince

( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Wed 24 Jan 2018, 14:12, archived)

wow

( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 24 Jan 2018, 14:22, archived)

The Krypton Factor
Tony Krypton is forced to do a range of mental, physical, and agility puzzles (including landing a plane) to defeat a shadowy organisation. They thought they had a foolproof plan, what they didn't foresee was... The Krypton Factor
( keybo was imtypingonakeyboard, now I'm not, Wed 24 Jan 2018, 14:17, archived)

I liked him in Red Dwarf

( 2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Wed 24 Jan 2018, 14:19, archived)

Sounds good.
Jackie Chan should be in it in some capacity.
( .Yeti. El amor en los tiempos del cólera, Wed 24 Jan 2018, 14:21, archived)

He is in the Spot the Difference video
"In the first one Jackie crashes through 1 roof, in the second video Jackie crashes through 7 roofs."
( keybo was imtypingonakeyboard, now I'm not, Wed 24 Jan 2018, 14:23, archived)

The 6 o'clock show with Micheal Aspell and Britain's brainest black driver Fred housego

( mongychops, Wed 24 Jan 2018, 14:28, archived)

Fred Housego's not black m8.
I'm going to have to delolt if we veer off into lolracism again.
( .Yeti. El amor en los tiempos del cólera, Wed 24 Jan 2018, 14:32, archived)

did you forget the word "cab" on purpose?

( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Wed 24 Jan 2018, 14:32, archived)

Nah I'd have called him houseboy if I did it on purpose

( mongychops, Wed 24 Jan 2018, 14:39, archived)

Some Muzzas Do Ave Em
classic slapstick and suicide bombing
( GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Wed 24 Jan 2018, 14:33, archived)

I'm almost tempted to click this.

( .Yeti. El amor en los tiempos del cólera, Wed 24 Jan 2018, 14:34, archived)

Some Mullah's Do 'Ave' Em.
A long-suffering imam stives to keep control of his zany congregation.

This isn't even necessarily racist.
( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Wed 24 Jan 2018, 14:44, archived)

They could all be white, being muslim isn't a race

( mongychops, Wed 24 Jan 2018, 14:47, archived)

Exactly.
We're on to a winner, here.
( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Wed 24 Jan 2018, 14:59, archived)

That's living all white...

( GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Wed 24 Jan 2018, 15:36, archived)

i've just been relieved of childminding duties tonight
so there may now be gin instead
( Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Wed 24 Jan 2018, 14:40, archived)

Social services intervention?
'Noon The LOVELY Smashy. I have ALL of the rum. ALL of it.
( stuj (^(^;;^)^) GO TEAM SPIDERS!(^(^;;^)^), Wed 24 Jan 2018, 15:16, archived)

lucky bugger
my sister's ill and i was going to look after the twins tonight, but looks like they're staying with my parents instead
( Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Wed 24 Jan 2018, 15:23, archived)

Jayce and the Wheeled Warriors could do with some better animation
and a plot that made sense
( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Wed 24 Jan 2018, 14:41, archived)

Yeah.
Somebody call Brian May and see if we can get some Queen for the soundtrack.
( .Yeti. El amor en los tiempos del cólera, Wed 24 Jan 2018, 14:47, archived)

the late late breakfast show

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 24 Jan 2018, 14:43, archived)

Fuck off, Noel.

( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Wed 24 Jan 2018, 14:46, archived)

Allo Allo.

( stuj (^(^;;^)^) GO TEAM SPIDERS!(^(^;;^)^), Wed 24 Jan 2018, 15:15, archived)

Johnny Depp as Gordon Kaye's character

( $$ ✅, Wed 24 Jan 2018, 15:25, archived)

Christina Ricci as Yvette.

( stuj (^(^;;^)^) GO TEAM SPIDERS!(^(^;;^)^), Wed 24 Jan 2018, 15:33, archived)

Lexi Belle as Michelle

( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 24 Jan 2018, 15:34, archived)

Gina Gerson as Mimi.

( stuj (^(^;;^)^) GO TEAM SPIDERS!(^(^;;^)^), Wed 24 Jan 2018, 15:35, archived)

ok, I'm rigid

( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 24 Jan 2018, 15:41, archived)

You can only express yourself through innuendo, in this context.

( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Wed 24 Jan 2018, 15:52, archived)

Ok, I'll try
My cock has become excited, it has filled with blood and as such has become very stiff.
( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 24 Jan 2018, 15:54, archived)

^ ze fallen Hats viz ze hard villy

( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Wed 24 Jan 2018, 16:15, archived)

Up the Elephant and round the Castle.

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Wed 24 Jan 2018, 15:24, archived)

The Likely Lads
Starting Mark Wahlberg and Channing Tatum.
( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Wed 24 Jan 2018, 15:27, archived)

They'll do it with an all-female cast. LIke Ghostbusters.

( stuj (^(^;;^)^) GO TEAM SPIDERS!(^(^;;^)^), Wed 24 Jan 2018, 15:34, archived)

Who doesn't love watching Melissa Mccarthy being vulgar?

( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Wed 24 Jan 2018, 15:47, archived)

She's the Will Ferrell of comedy actresses.
Which I think is criticism enough.
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Wed 24 Jan 2018, 16:14, archived)

that's a bit harsh

( Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Wed 24 Jan 2018, 16:18, archived)

She's easily the worst thing about the Ghostbusters remake.
Kate McKinnon was great, though.
( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Wed 24 Jan 2018, 16:30, archived)

oh, i agree she's terrible and the ghostbusters remake was an utter disgrace
but will ferrell bad?
( Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Wed 24 Jan 2018, 16:33, archived)

I thought he was, but I think maybe he's just in a lot of bad films,
as he's actually a decent comic actor.

I actually don't mind the Ghostbusters remake. Plenty wrong with it, sure, but it was entertaining enough (which isn't something I can normally say about a Paul Feig film). Think I'm gay for Chris Hemsworth, as a result, which would be troubling if he weren't so damn charming.
( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Wed 24 Jan 2018, 16:39, archived)

i can't bear will ferrell
except in megamind, when it's only his voice
( Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Wed 24 Jan 2018, 16:47, archived)

And Ben Stiller and Owen Wilson.
Pair of unfunny cunts.
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Wed 24 Jan 2018, 16:52, archived)

Ben Stiller is alright.
Mystery Men is a great film.
( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Wed 24 Jan 2018, 16:55, archived)

I much prefer him when he is not in a "so called" comedy.

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Wed 24 Jan 2018, 16:56, archived)

that was good

( Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Wed 24 Jan 2018, 16:58, archived)

Martin Lawrence is quite tolerable when he can't be seen, too.
Likewise, Adam Sandler.
( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Wed 24 Jan 2018, 16:53, archived)

I've warmed to him since The Lego Movie.
Judd Apatow remains a stain on humanity, however.
( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Wed 24 Jan 2018, 16:18, archived)

And Jack Black.
I would quite happily never again look at his gurning visage and "rock n roll" ways.
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Wed 24 Jan 2018, 16:47, archived)

^^^^^^^^^^^^
THIS
( Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Wed 24 Jan 2018, 16:48, archived)

I've a soft spot for School Of Rock,
but he's another one that I'd prefer stick to voice work.
( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Wed 24 Jan 2018, 17:01, archived)

Disqualified
But still would.
( keybo was imtypingonakeyboard, now I'm not, Wed 24 Jan 2018, 16:00, archived)

The Melting Pot

( social hand grenade I was a lurker before you were a lurker, Wed 24 Jan 2018, 20:05, archived)

hey what's your favourite breakfast cereal?
d'you know sugar is a poison and sweeteners cause cancer?
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 24 Jan 2018, 10:45, archived)

Crunchy Guff Corn Flakes

( .Yeti. El amor en los tiempos del cólera, Wed 24 Jan 2018, 10:49, archived)

Coco Guffs

( broadsword w⚓, Wed 24 Jan 2018, 10:51, archived)

www.youtube.com/watch?v=zzOzlHEqgRc&t=1s
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Wed 24 Jan 2018, 12:49, archived)

All food is poison.
That's why I'm a breatharian.
( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Wed 24 Jan 2018, 10:52, archived)

breath guff
( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Wed 24 Jan 2018, 10:53, archived)

Guffy Charms

( sock more tea vicar?, Wed 24 Jan 2018, 10:53, archived)

Puddi puddi puddi puddi giga puddi

( mongychops, Wed 24 Jan 2018, 10:54, archived)

^ Guffi Gang

( .Yeti. El amor en los tiempos del cólera, Wed 24 Jan 2018, 10:55, archived)

I only buy the organic sugar-free puddi puddi puddi puddi giga puddi

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 24 Jan 2018, 10:59, archived)

Cinnamon Guffams

( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Wed 24 Jan 2018, 10:55, archived)

I just pick all my scabs into a bowl and eat them with natural yoghurt

( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Wed 24 Jan 2018, 10:55, archived)

This is how muller corners are made.

( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Wed 24 Jan 2018, 11:00, archived)

shit on a gunt

( $$ ✅, Wed 24 Jan 2018, 10:57, archived)

b3ta.com/questions/sexyregrets/post1466131
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 24 Jan 2018, 11:00, archived)

back in the days when qftw was a wall of text
thank fuck those days have gone
( $$ ✅, Wed 24 Jan 2018, 11:02, archived)

The Twix story still makes me giggle.

( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Wed 24 Jan 2018, 11:06, archived)

Sugar Guffs

( broadsword w⚓, Wed 24 Jan 2018, 10:59, archived)

Oh, they're called Honey Monster Guffs now
it's political correctness gone mad
( broadsword w⚓, Wed 24 Jan 2018, 11:02, archived)

Coco pops mixed half and half with frosties, chocolate milk and a big glass of sugar water.

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Wed 24 Jan 2018, 11:01, archived)

Two Hats
i.redditmedia.com/gcQO4S_isAEB4i2EC7mQhlHcwCJRb_mtJBrISl5esAc.jpg?w=590&s=ad20b34802b6c7ae176ea93d9c654c3e
( $$ ✅, Wed 24 Jan 2018, 11:06, archived)

For breakfast?

( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Wed 24 Jan 2018, 11:09, archived)

he must be knee deep in fanny

( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 24 Jan 2018, 11:13, archived)

he's wearing waders because of all the sopping clunge

( $$ ✅, Wed 24 Jan 2018, 11:15, archived)

I must admit, it's making me a bit frothy

( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 24 Jan 2018, 11:18, archived)

grits

( Woodkovsky ☹️➝🚻➝🚽➝😣➝💩➝🧻➝😁, Wed 24 Jan 2018, 11:28, archived)

Guffy Charms with a side of eggy bread

( GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Wed 24 Jan 2018, 11:41, archived)

Sausage flakes

( Smash Monkey 2 The damp spastic, Wed 24 Jan 2018, 11:52, archived)

Filth

( broadsword w⚓, Wed 24 Jan 2018, 11:54, archived)

Bloody cheats
www.arabianbusiness.com/culture-society/388145-camels-disqualified-from-saudi-beauty-contest-over-botox
( mongychops, Wed 24 Jan 2018, 12:08, archived)

morning

( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Wed 24 Jan 2018, 7:34, archived)

Alright.

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Wed 24 Jan 2018, 7:44, archived)

in a better mood today?

( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Wed 24 Jan 2018, 8:07, archived)

No

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Wed 24 Jan 2018, 8:17, archived)

Cheer up Charlie

( mongychops, Wed 24 Jan 2018, 8:23, archived)

Yes!

( drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Wed 24 Jan 2018, 7:46, archived)

i.imgur.com/SuZ2nvK.mp4
( drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Wed 24 Jan 2018, 7:56, archived)

we don't have shitposts here
because we don't have any other kinds of posts.
( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Wed 24 Jan 2018, 8:08, archived)

Say it like you mean it.
Meaurning all.
( .Yeti. El amor en los tiempos del cólera, Wed 24 Jan 2018, 8:13, archived)

Mauning

( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Wed 24 Jan 2018, 8:45, archived)

Morning! It's Windy Wednesday!
*parp*
( broadsword w⚓, Wed 24 Jan 2018, 8:22, archived)

I'm just glad to have my own day. No matter how smelly.

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Wed 24 Jan 2018, 8:44, archived)

That's what hanging around in barns will do for you.

( .Yeti. El amor en los tiempos del cólera, Wed 24 Jan 2018, 8:45, archived)

wednesday's pig is full of wind
thursday's pig is naught but rind
&c.
(ozof, Wed 24 Jan 2018, 8:57, archived)

my farts herald the start of a new day

( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Wed 24 Jan 2018, 8:46, archived)

Wednesday's child is full of woe

( $$ ✅, Wed 24 Jan 2018, 8:28, archived)

o e
( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Wed 24 Jan 2018, 8:46, archived)

w sl
+ gin
( .Yeti. El amor en los tiempos del cólera, Wed 24 Jan 2018, 8:49, archived)

e o, yay and houpla
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 24 Jan 2018, 8:55, archived)

w h
s in different area codes
( broadsword w⚓, Wed 24 Jan 2018, 9:07, archived)

alright alright I'm here what more do you want

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 24 Jan 2018, 8:52, archived)

a more than half-arsed Outkast tribute act, to be honest

( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Wed 24 Jan 2018, 8:54, archived)

I'm sorry ms grrrson

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 24 Jan 2018, 8:56, archived)

alright Richey Edwards

( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Wed 24 Jan 2018, 8:59, archived)

Golden crusted flakes of morn.

( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Wed 24 Jan 2018, 9:39, archived)

urgh, wash your face m8, that's mank.

( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Wed 24 Jan 2018, 9:40, archived)

I had a friend in primary school whose face was permanently crusted with baked bean juice.
His teeth were mostly black and he stank.
( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Wed 24 Jan 2018, 9:52, archived)

I was all about the Crunchy Nut Cornflakes when I was a kid.
The average bowl has enough sugar to make your hands shake.
( .Yeti. El amor en los tiempos del cólera, Wed 24 Jan 2018, 9:51, archived)

Yes, they're all but banned in our house, on account of their sugar content.
Father-in-law will occasionally treat himself to a box, but it never survives the kids' locust-like onslaught.
( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Wed 24 Jan 2018, 9:56, archived)

Evening thread, to a soundtrack featuring Norah Jones and Nina Simone.
Anyone got a fun-packed evening lined up? I'm making dinner and listening to Handel's Sarabande.

BAAAAAAM BAAAAAAAM!
ba BAAAAAAAM BAAAAAAAAM!

Good ol' Barry Lyndon, eh?
( .Yeti. El amor en los tiempos del cólera, Tue 23 Jan 2018, 19:49, archived)

I'm in a barn. It smells like poo.

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Tue 23 Jan 2018, 19:57, archived)

What on earth are you doing in a barn?

( .Yeti. El amor en los tiempos del cólera, Tue 23 Jan 2018, 20:01, archived)

smelling poo

( manolith hooray for me, Tue 23 Jan 2018, 20:03, archived)

Watching ladypig ride a horse.
Well, I was, I'm sat out the back of the barn now. We're not far from brize norton here, and 3 times in a row a plane has circled, come down low, nearly touched down by the look of it and then powered back up and off for another go around. Practicing aborted landings maybe? Bloody noisy.
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Tue 23 Jan 2018, 20:04, archived)

Fifty quid says it's teenage pilots thinking they're Douglas Bader to show off to their mates.

( .Yeti. El amor en los tiempos del cólera, Tue 23 Jan 2018, 20:07, archived)

These are big planes, I'd say Hercules size, but I'm not sure they're still stationed at brize.

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Tue 23 Jan 2018, 20:12, archived)

Aye, that'd make a fair bit of noise, alright.

( .Yeti. El amor en los tiempos del cólera, Tue 23 Jan 2018, 20:14, archived)

I'm still working
fuck this shit
( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Tue 23 Jan 2018, 20:06, archived)

Bruh.
I hope the fucker-up will know your name is the lord, when you lay your vengeance upon him.
( .Yeti. El amor en los tiempos del cólera, Tue 23 Jan 2018, 20:07, archived)

Talisker Storm has helped take the edge off
but heads will roll for this bullshittery
( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Tue 23 Jan 2018, 21:43, archived)

Ferrying children to/from Pokémon club and scouts.
And taking down the emergency light that just fell off the ceiling.
( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Tue 23 Jan 2018, 20:20, archived)

TIL Pokémon club was a thing.

( .Yeti. El amor en los tiempos del cólera, Tue 23 Jan 2018, 20:22, archived)

I spend every weekend in a Pokégym,
and my youngest is one of their "Elite 4".
( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Tue 23 Jan 2018, 20:51, archived)

Don't think this is going back up:
imgur.com/JBTBOLu
( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Tue 23 Jan 2018, 20:43, archived)

crikey

( .Yeti. El amor en los tiempos del cólera, Tue 23 Jan 2018, 20:45, archived)

Are there not now live cables hanging out from wherever that fell from?

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Tue 23 Jan 2018, 20:45, archived)

Yup.
Put a bit of chocolate block on the ends and shoved them back into the ceiling, but I'd appreciate some sensible advice, if it's going?
( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Tue 23 Jan 2018, 20:56, archived)

Well, if it's an emergency, one of the live cables is a permanent live feed,
So you'll have to knock it off at the breaker or a emergency key switch to do any work. Where is it? Your house?
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Tue 23 Jan 2018, 21:35, archived)

Yeah. Leftover from when this was a children's home (think Tracy Beaker).
Seems to be on the same fuse as the downstairs lights, as the little red light on it went out when I flicked that one. At any rate, I didn't get killed when I disconnected it (it was hanging by the wires) and put the block on, but I don't imagine that's a permanent solution.
( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Tue 23 Jan 2018, 21:41, archived)

Sounds reasonable. How many wires?
Depends what you're going to replace it with. If you get an emergency fitting it's easy enough to figure out which is perm and which is switched live with a normal multi tester. If you're going for a normal fitting, to be regs you'll need to safely terminate the perm somehow, if it was me id just put it in a connector and tape it up, but I doubt that's enough for an inspector. You can get some nice emergency lights these days, might be worth just keeping it as was for ease.
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Tue 23 Jan 2018, 21:49, archived)

Dunno why you are helping, he's got this

( mongychops, Tue 23 Jan 2018, 21:54, archived)

Is chocolate block a thing? Took me a second or two to figure out he must mean a connector block.

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Tue 23 Jan 2018, 21:57, archived)

I've always called them that, no idea where I picked it up from.

( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Tue 23 Jan 2018, 22:08, archived)

fucking hell
i've been imagining you having gaffa taped a quality street tin over a dangerous hole in your ceiling or something
( artifus is doing it all wrong, Tue 23 Jan 2018, 22:31, archived)

Hey, great idea!
I'm sure I have one of those left over from Christmas, too...
( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Tue 23 Jan 2018, 22:34, archived)

Wasn't planning on replacing it, so if wrapping the block in tape and shoving it back through the ceiling hole is safe, I'll do that.
Red, Black and Yellow/Green wires, and there is something to be said for having emergency lights, I suppose. There's 2 others in the house, one of which doesn't work, so I could do that at the same time. I really should invest in a multitester.

Cheers for the reassurance, Windy.
( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Tue 23 Jan 2018, 22:07, archived)

Just 3 cables? Does it not work off the switch?
It'd be a lot safer to find out where it goes and take it out really, if it was just a cable ditched in the back of the fitting it's probably alright, but I wouldn't want a live cable flapping about in the ceiling somewhere
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Tue 23 Jan 2018, 22:13, archived)

Argh!
Probably wrap it up, short term, then get someone who knows what they're doing to sort it out. Need to get the smoke detectors done, too (they run off the mains, with a battery in for backup, but like to chirp a low battery warning all the time, so they've had the batteries pulled out and switched off at the fuse, making them pointless). Probably living in a death trap.
( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Tue 23 Jan 2018, 22:20, archived)

Why do you live in an old school house?
You're like the ghost of a paedo haunting where he was finally caught and beaten to death by angry parents.
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Tue 23 Jan 2018, 22:34, archived)

Not a school house, think more care in the community.
Think they housed troubled teens here, judging by the one cupboard in the kitchen with a lock on it, that had been repeatedly broken into. There's a window in my lounge door that's made of that glass with a wire grid run through it, which lends the room an institutional feel. Proper locks on all the internal doors, too, and what is now the playroom used to be an office, so has its own fuse box (for reasons I don't understand) and had proper workplace lighting.
( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Tue 23 Jan 2018, 22:44, archived)

Renovate you weirdo.

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Tue 23 Jan 2018, 22:54, archived)

But I'm living in the house!
Windows are getting done, this month, boiler got replaced shortly after we moved in, so it's a gradual process. Here for the long haul, so it's not like I'm planning to flip the place for profit.
( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Tue 23 Jan 2018, 23:02, archived)

On the plus side, you've just found the secret cheese stash.

( drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Tue 23 Jan 2018, 20:47, archived)

That bit had a "remove this sticker before installation" sticker covering it.
Clearly a highly professional install.
( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Tue 23 Jan 2018, 20:58, archived)

I'd praise it for being up so many years, bit of a burnt got spot at the end, and only the case hade cracked, the components look ok

( mongychops, Tue 23 Jan 2018, 21:58, archived)

16 years in place, according to the testing notice inside (matches with the date the extension was done, too).
No idea what brought it down, looks like the plastic has just given way.
( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Tue 23 Jan 2018, 22:12, archived)

What, was it glued to the ceiling?

( drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Tue 23 Jan 2018, 22:38, archived)

Screwed in - part of it is still up there.

( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Tue 23 Jan 2018, 22:47, archived)

.
( drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Tue 23 Jan 2018, 21:05, archived)

I want that 2 minutes back.

( drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Tue 23 Jan 2018, 21:05, archived)

Last.

( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Tue 23 Jan 2018, 10:52, archived)

Christmas.

( drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Tue 23 Jan 2018, 10:54, archived)

time ever i saw your face

( broadsword w⚓, Tue 23 Jan 2018, 10:56, archived)

of the mohicans

( Cheers Cheers, Tue 23 Jan 2018, 10:57, archived)