» Losing Your Virginity

Decided to do it in the local park after lock-up
In the early stages of friskiness and moderate state of undress I looked over her shoulder to find a dog sniffing her arse.
(Thu 3rd Mar 2005, 9:00, More)

» Stupid Tourists

I got stuck behind an English woman in a patisserie in the north of France
with her three kids trying loudly and slowly to describe a chocolate eclair to the assistant cos she didn't know the French name for them.

I appologised when she left.
(Fri 8th Jul 2005, 11:15, More)

» Lies I told on my CV

not a lie
because when I failed my A-levels in Physics and Maths (second time round) Suffolk College sent me a GNVQ certificate for a Media course I'd never heard of.

I'll retire it when I've finished my PhD in Physics.
(Thu 6th Jul 2006, 20:10, More)

» My Worst Vomit

waking
to find seaguls feasting on the remnants of a regurgetated onion-bhaji I'd spent the last of my shrapnel on sticks in my mind a bit.
(Thu 19th Aug 2004, 21:30, More)

» World's Sickest Joke

hmmm
Why did the young Greek boy leave home?

He was fed up with the way he was being reared...


Why did he go back?

He couldn't bare to leave his younger brothers behind.
(Fri 10th Sep 2004, 21:02, More)