» Sacked

A friend and I got sacked by the local temp Agency
whilst on contract for them in a warehouse for a large distribution food chain that may or may not rhyme with the word "fuckers", having said that, we only actually worked there for 4 days, a Thursday to a Sunday.

The first day was quite fun, we got a full days pay for half a days training on electrical pallet truck things called LLOPs, (Low Level Operating... Pwiddles, it's pronounced Lollop, which is a fun word to have to say all day) and RF stocktaking jobbies.

The second day was fine, we weren't very good at the fast version of shopping having never needed to put 32 crates of stella on a pallet before, and with that in mind, they cut us some slack, because we only got through roughlyhalf of our estimated workload for the day.

Day 3 was more of day 2, but we were getting better, but now that it wasn't our first day anymore, the line manager started getting on our backs over it, we took great deligh in confusing him with long words, like arm and leg. He was a cunthorse anyway.

Day 4 was when it all kicked off. Early in the day (about 2 hours in, I took a fall due to a broken pallet, twisting my knee and aggrevating an old sporting injury involving ligaments and massive pain. and then later with it being a sunday, the canteen was closed, this in itself didn't cause me such a problem, but my friend was diabetic. I knew this, the agency knew this and a fair few of the high level staff knew this. Had anybody told us the canteen was shut on a sunday? Had they buggery! the following convesation happened between myself and the line manager.

Me: The canteen's shut
LM: yeah
Me: we weren't told
LM: Not my problem
Me: Sam's Diabetic
LM: and?
Me: if he doesn't eat, we have a problem
LM: He has a problem
Me: If he goes into anaphylactic shock, it'll be a bookers company problem
LM: well what can I do?
Me: I'd suggest letting him go off site get smething to eat
LM: he can't go off site
this carried on for about 10 minutes. and the final solution was that we would have to borrow a card, which we had been advised against buying in the first place, from another permanent staff member, and, as the machine to credit it didn't take notes, had to use our meagre amount of change to stock up on crap crisps and flat, out of date drinks.

the next day they phoned us up to work the following wednesday, I said I was going to the doctors and would get back to them, sam told them he'd have to see what i was doing, as I was his driver.
I went to the walk-in centre, and was told to "stay off it for 2 weeks, or risk serious damage" which was fine for me. I phoned up the agency and said i wasn't going to be able to work for a fortnight, as I didn't fancy hospitalizing my self, the woman said they needed a note from my doctor, otherwise it would coun as AWOL, this I arranged, but it took a further 3 days.

I took the note in and was told to contact them for further work "if and when" it heals, I essentially was accused of lying despite going for a note and recieving a physical, in which i was told i had medial ligament damage to an extent that i shouldn't be walking without extreme pain, and a note writing me out for a "minimum of a fourteen days"

My friend phoned them up and said that he wasn't going to go back because of their attitude in response to his diabetes dilema.
They phoned him back a few days later asking him to work and he told them to cock off and hung up. I went back 2 weeks later and said i could go back, they said they weren't going to take me back as they had had a load of other members of staff quit (she mentioned names of 4 others, all also students, and said they would have to review their recruitment policies.

They then phoned me back and told me I owed them back pay as I had lost some bonus for being absent, i told them to cock off and hung up, knowing full well that if they wanted to reclaim an overpayment, they can only take back 10p in the pound a month, and i wasn't going to be working for them ever again, they had no choice but to let me keep it. Which was lucky as I had already drank it.

Apologies for my extreme length (hehe)
(Fri 24th Feb 2006, 8:07, More)

» Sacked

The short version
A friend and I got sacked from A temp agency, Him for daring to be diabetic when they closed their canteen on a sunday without telling us. I got sacked for injuring myself a work, getting a doctors note and going through al the correct procedure.

we did both tell the management to cock off over the phone though
(Fri 24th Feb 2006, 8:10, More)

» Fancy Dress

holiday
My mother always was an absolute beast at costume making.

on holiday one year i was entered into the childrens fancy dress competition. I was about 5.

The costume consisted of a pair of large white square pieces of foam that constituted bread, with crepe paper and foam lettuce, tomato and cheese stuffed liberally around the edges.
The plan was that i was to stand, legs and arms apart and when asked what I had come as, I was to pronounce with the confidence of the messiah "a sandwich spread".

That was the plan.

Instead I stood there stubbornly in my large bread overcoat and whenthe MC came to me and said "now then, what have you come as?" I shouted "A BUTTY" at the microphone.

I won, and I still contest that I would have been booed out of Dawlish if I'd gone with my mum's idea.
(Mon 16th Jan 2006, 9:58, More)