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- a member for 20 years, 5 months and 10 days
- has posted 21 messages on the main board
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- has posted 2 stories and 0 replies on question of the week
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» Best Comebacks
Prozac Kev
My mate used to work with a guy they called Prozac Kev. Kev had been on Prozac for heaven-knows how long and it had really messed with his head.
So one day, God-Boss of the company comes around to tour the factory floor. In he hobbles like Young Mr Grace with an ear trumpet and a cane, and he taps Prozac Kev on the shoulder.
"Excuse me sonny, could I have a word?"
Kev turns around and says "Yeah, you can have two. Fuck off!"
He got his P45 the next morning.
(Thu 29th Apr 2004, 20:00, More)
Prozac Kev
My mate used to work with a guy they called Prozac Kev. Kev had been on Prozac for heaven-knows how long and it had really messed with his head.
So one day, God-Boss of the company comes around to tour the factory floor. In he hobbles like Young Mr Grace with an ear trumpet and a cane, and he taps Prozac Kev on the shoulder.
"Excuse me sonny, could I have a word?"
Kev turns around and says "Yeah, you can have two. Fuck off!"
He got his P45 the next morning.
(Thu 29th Apr 2004, 20:00, More)
» Your Revenge Stories
Dregs
We were in the pub once, when a mate (now ex-mate) vanished off to have a lash, leaving us with strict instructions to watch his pint.
He wasn't someone we were particularly fond of, and mainly let him hang around out of sympathy. So, of course, the first thing we did as soon as he left was neck his pint.
A little worried he may notice, we made him a new pint - using the dregs from every empty glass on the bar.
He returned and sat and asked "Is this one mine?"
"Oh yes" we replied and watched him greedily slurp half of it down.
"No, that can't be mine," he says "Mine was lager, that is bitter."
We bought him another pint in the end. But that will server the fat fucker right for all the misery he put us through before and since.
(Fri 14th May 2004, 13:23, More)
Dregs
We were in the pub once, when a mate (now ex-mate) vanished off to have a lash, leaving us with strict instructions to watch his pint.
He wasn't someone we were particularly fond of, and mainly let him hang around out of sympathy. So, of course, the first thing we did as soon as he left was neck his pint.
A little worried he may notice, we made him a new pint - using the dregs from every empty glass on the bar.
He returned and sat and asked "Is this one mine?"
"Oh yes" we replied and watched him greedily slurp half of it down.
"No, that can't be mine," he says "Mine was lager, that is bitter."
We bought him another pint in the end. But that will server the fat fucker right for all the misery he put us through before and since.
(Fri 14th May 2004, 13:23, More)