Profile for Shining Love Pig:
surroundedbyfishandrice
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- a member for 5 years, 10 months and 15 days
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- has posted 8 stories and 0 replies on question of the week
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surroundedbyfishandrice
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» Pet Stories
cats cats cats
Ours was a cat family. Before our Gran moved in, we had accumulated five...Gran, being of the divorced and demented denomination, had nineteen of the buggers...at one point I knew all their names, but I digress...
A noteworthy character was Murray, a slithe and nimble fellow, who liked nothing better than deftly skipping up your leg, scaling your back and coming to rest on your shoulders like a ginger scarf. Since he was so delicate of frame, it was a while before he started to get heavy.
The problem came with Deckland, a tabby who was built like a tank. He was clearly up for what Murray was getting, and would also try to reach your shoulders, unfortunately in a far less graceful manner, what with the scrabbling and the claws, the tearing and the colossal weight of a muscular tabby on your shoulders...
Then there was Jasper, a jet black, charismatic and affable chap, who unfortunately became a rapist in later life...poor, weak defenseless Snoopy...
...and Esmerelda, a handy lady to have about the place, for when another cat was sick, she would zoom in and lap it up completely, a dangerous "don't come anywhere near me!" look in her eyes...
(Fri 8th Jun 2007, 10:40, More)
cats cats cats
Ours was a cat family. Before our Gran moved in, we had accumulated five...Gran, being of the divorced and demented denomination, had nineteen of the buggers...at one point I knew all their names, but I digress...
A noteworthy character was Murray, a slithe and nimble fellow, who liked nothing better than deftly skipping up your leg, scaling your back and coming to rest on your shoulders like a ginger scarf. Since he was so delicate of frame, it was a while before he started to get heavy.
The problem came with Deckland, a tabby who was built like a tank. He was clearly up for what Murray was getting, and would also try to reach your shoulders, unfortunately in a far less graceful manner, what with the scrabbling and the claws, the tearing and the colossal weight of a muscular tabby on your shoulders...
Then there was Jasper, a jet black, charismatic and affable chap, who unfortunately became a rapist in later life...poor, weak defenseless Snoopy...
...and Esmerelda, a handy lady to have about the place, for when another cat was sick, she would zoom in and lap it up completely, a dangerous "don't come anywhere near me!" look in her eyes...
(Fri 8th Jun 2007, 10:40, More)
» Guilty Secrets
shame? maybe...
I can recite an entire Mr Kipling advert from the eighties
(Fri 31st Aug 2007, 12:33, More)
shame? maybe...
I can recite an entire Mr Kipling advert from the eighties
(Fri 31st Aug 2007, 12:33, More)
» Road Rage
Silly bugger...and men can multi-task
I`ve never snapped at anyone...but a certain Shining Love Piglet, embarking upon road cycling for the first time, was slightly lax about hand signals. My leisurely change of lanes cues a deafening screech behind me, then a rapid accelerating "vroom" noise sprouting from just behind my right ear. A well polished and probably very nice car sidles up, with a bespectacled gent shaking his fist at me and roaring
"IMBECILE!"
Never been called that name before or since, and frankly, I deserved it.
Incidentally, over here in sunny J-pan, I saw a guy riding a bicycle (not exactly at a crawl) whilst holding an umbrella, smoking a cigarette and reading a manga at the same time. Respect.
(Fri 13th Oct 2006, 3:46, More)
Silly bugger...and men can multi-task
I`ve never snapped at anyone...but a certain Shining Love Piglet, embarking upon road cycling for the first time, was slightly lax about hand signals. My leisurely change of lanes cues a deafening screech behind me, then a rapid accelerating "vroom" noise sprouting from just behind my right ear. A well polished and probably very nice car sidles up, with a bespectacled gent shaking his fist at me and roaring
"IMBECILE!"
Never been called that name before or since, and frankly, I deserved it.
Incidentally, over here in sunny J-pan, I saw a guy riding a bicycle (not exactly at a crawl) whilst holding an umbrella, smoking a cigarette and reading a manga at the same time. Respect.
(Fri 13th Oct 2006, 3:46, More)
» Ignoring Instructions
Read a while ago in Fortean Times...
...so might not be exactly accurate...translation of instructions on a Swedish chainsaw
Do not operate on hands or testicles
(Wed 10th May 2006, 1:18, More)
Read a while ago in Fortean Times...
...so might not be exactly accurate...translation of instructions on a Swedish chainsaw
Do not operate on hands or testicles
(Wed 10th May 2006, 1:18, More)