» Impulse buys


I must admit that I do have a bit of a tendency to impulse buy, because of my busy and complicated life, and over the last few years, I've purchased various items for my home, just on a whim! These include chandeliers, several flat screen TVs, some lovely hanging baskets, a massage chair (just couldn't resist - highly recommended!) and even a little floating house for the ducks on my pond! I must admit though that I have a great employer and I can generally cover most of these purchases under a very lenient expenses system. What could possibly go wrong?
(Thu 21st May 2009, 14:22, More)

» The Weird Kid In Class

Think of the internet as a class.
There are clever smug hard-workers who always do well and everyone else hates (www.bbc.co.uk), tough kids who just make trouble and everyone is scared of (www.cia.gov), and sexy but rather dim girls who spend their time combing their hair and giggling (www.sex.etc). The weird kid in the corner, dressed in a T-shirt with a skull on it, who has a collection of dead beetles in his desk drawer, who once pierced his own ears at breaktime, who fantasises about shooting all of his classmates, well, that’s obviously www.b3ta.com.
(Fri 19th Jan 2007, 10:57, More)

» Intense Friendships

Intense friend

My imaginary friend was fun at first, but gradually he got really possessive and sulked when I played with some of my other imaginary friends. Then he started spreading really mean stories about me and in the end he used to hang around outside my house, just sort of staring. It was the imaginary hate-mail that really hurt though - blank pages. You can imagine.
(Fri 28th Jul 2006, 13:00, More)

» Phobias

First you must choose your weapon
I am near-phobic about making decisions and getting on with things
I find it terrifyingly difficult to make choices
I am terrified of making a wrong choice so I prefer to not make any choices
Blast it. MAKING CHOICES
*faints*
(Thu 10th Apr 2008, 16:58, More)

» Unexpected Nudity


My friend Edward found it tough being a school uniform designer, especially in the early days. He’s a household name now, but back when he was struggling, the only thing that cheered him up was his pet ferret, Onyx.

It was Dee Comprehensive that really put him on the road to success. The school was inviting aspiring designers to submit their proposals for a new school uniform; a big prize for the best.

Ed thought he’d give it a go. He asked me to call round, just before the deadline. Everything was done; everything except the tie, because he just couldn’t choose which one to go with. His designs were laid out all over the floor, and Ed was staring blankly into the middle distance. How was he to choose? His future career was about to be decided. Little did we know that within six months, he was going to be hailed as the greatest designer of school uniforms that there has ever been, winning awards and plaudits for every blazer. At that moment, he was stuck.

And this is when, somehow (no-one ever owned up to leaving the cage open), from somewhere, Onyx appeared. He ran up to Edward; he ran up to me. And then he ran around on the floor, back and forth, in a perfect frenzy. Then, just as suddenly as he had started, he skidded to a halt by one of the designs, and, difficult as it is to believe, he twisted his little ferrety tail around and pointed at the paper. There was no doubting what was in that little chap’s eyes. He could see victory.

So Ed followed the sound advice of his pet, and the rest is history. Strange as it seems, I suppose you could say that Onyx picked Ed’s new Dee tie.
(Sat 30th May 2009, 17:52, More)