Profile for Linbox:
Facts* about me:
Sex : Male
Nationality : Brit(ish)
Born : At an early age, in Liverpoolcestershire.
Home : Leafy 'ampshire.
Status : Married with three brats loverly kids (one of each)
Special skills : Black belt in origami
* May contains traces of lie
Anything to declare:
Have been a semi-regular lurker in these parts for a while, but finally got around to doing something about it in April'04.
My shopping skills are coming on in leaps and bounds, but still (sadly) not a patch on what half of b3tans are capable of. *sigh*
Super Secret Borked Saturday Club:
Favourite self-posts:
Grange Hill Humour
Stupid joke
Vicious Circle
D I V E !!
Recent front page messages:
Best answers to questions:
[read all their answers]
- a member for 5 years, 7 months and 13 days
- has posted 1277 messages on the main board
- (of which 2 have appeared on the front page)
- has posted 461 messages on the talk board
- has posted 7 messages on the links board
- (including 1 links)
- has posted 72 stories and 11 replies on question of the week
- They liked 162 pictures, 1 links, 1 talk posts, and 134 qotw answers.
- Ignore this user
- Add this user as a friend
- send me a message
Facts* about me:
Sex : Male Nationality : Brit(ish) Born : At an early age, in Liverpoolcestershire. Home : Leafy 'ampshire. Status : Married with three Special skills : Black belt in origami* May contains traces of lie
Anything to declare:
Have been a semi-regular lurker in these parts for a while, but finally got around to doing something about it in April'04.
My shopping skills are coming on in leaps and bounds, but still (sadly) not a patch on what half of b3tans are capable of. *sigh*
Super Secret Borked Saturday Club:
Favourite self-posts:
Grange Hill Humour Stupid joke Vicious Circle D I V E !! Recent front page messages:
New Logo
I claim this FP on behalf of the SSBSC - yay! and Ta!
Explainio : During a chunk of Saturday 5-June-2004, www.b3ta.com was unavailable. Quite a few people managed to find the IP Address and carried on with a most lovely, friendly and it has to be say, odd day. These people are the SSBSC - Super Secret Borked Saturday Club - and proudly proclaim their membership in their profiles.
(Sat 5th Jun 2004, 20:56, More)
I claim this FP on behalf of the SSBSC - yay! and Ta!
Explainio : During a chunk of Saturday 5-June-2004, www.b3ta.com was unavailable. Quite a few people managed to find the IP Address and carried on with a most lovely, friendly and it has to be say, odd day. These people are the SSBSC - Super Secret Borked Saturday Club - and proudly proclaim their membership in their profiles.
(Sat 5th Jun 2004, 20:56, More)
Best answers to questions:
» Abusing freebies
Taking teh piss
How about somebody I know who was putting a large system into a large hotel who was provided with free food and accomodation in said 5* luxury hotel for SIX MONTHS.
The only thing he had to pay for during his stay was drink & phone calls. So for 24 weeks, he drank like a fish and phoned everybody he knew including his mother-in-law in the US for hour-long chats.
The day before he checked out, he brought the server down for one last "safety check" and promptly wiped his room account at the same time...
Now *that* is abuse.
(Thu 8th Nov 2007, 15:44, More)
Taking teh piss
How about somebody I know who was putting a large system into a large hotel who was provided with free food and accomodation in said 5* luxury hotel for SIX MONTHS.
The only thing he had to pay for during his stay was drink & phone calls. So for 24 weeks, he drank like a fish and phoned everybody he knew including his mother-in-law in the US for hour-long chats.
The day before he checked out, he brought the server down for one last "safety check" and promptly wiped his room account at the same time...
Now *that* is abuse.
(Thu 8th Nov 2007, 15:44, More)
» Foot in Mouth Syndrome
Norfolk Broads
My mate JW went on a two week boating holiday on the Norfolk Broads with his girlfriend, mum & dad, an auntie and both of his grandmothers. Because the interior walls of the narrowboat were paper thin, he and the gf decided to self-impose a nookie ban for fear of embarrassing all the wrinklies, but by the end of the first week, he was absolutely gagging for it.
Imagine then his delight at waking up very early Sunday morning to find the boat absolutely silent – woo!, yay! and hoopla! A damn good shagging ensued after which the boat was still completely silent, so they do it all over again, with a little more gusto.
After dispensing a weeks worth of baby glue, JW pops to the galley for a post-coital drink and notices, in horror, through the galley window two things;
i) His entire family sat in awkward silence on the riverbank having breakfast.
ii) The mini-tsunami of tidal waves from the bonking still hadn’t settled down.
Made the second week a bit awkward.
(Wed 21st Apr 2004, 8:39, More)
Norfolk Broads
My mate JW went on a two week boating holiday on the Norfolk Broads with his girlfriend, mum & dad, an auntie and both of his grandmothers. Because the interior walls of the narrowboat were paper thin, he and the gf decided to self-impose a nookie ban for fear of embarrassing all the wrinklies, but by the end of the first week, he was absolutely gagging for it.
Imagine then his delight at waking up very early Sunday morning to find the boat absolutely silent – woo!, yay! and hoopla! A damn good shagging ensued after which the boat was still completely silent, so they do it all over again, with a little more gusto.
After dispensing a weeks worth of baby glue, JW pops to the galley for a post-coital drink and notices, in horror, through the galley window two things;
i) His entire family sat in awkward silence on the riverbank having breakfast.
ii) The mini-tsunami of tidal waves from the bonking still hadn’t settled down.
Made the second week a bit awkward.
(Wed 21st Apr 2004, 8:39, More)
» Have you ever been rude to a celebrity?
A-List Celeb Humilated
Quite a few years ago now, my Granddad and some of his work colleagues paid a flying visit to Berlin to deliver a message to the Chancellor of Germany.
The message in question was "Up Yours Adolf", written on the side of several 500lb bombs which they dropped from their RAF Lancaster bomber.
Apparently, Herr Hitler was not amused and shortly afterwards killed himself.
No fucking sense of humour the Germans.
.
(Thu 15th Apr 2004, 1:13, More)
A-List Celeb Humilated
Quite a few years ago now, my Granddad and some of his work colleagues paid a flying visit to Berlin to deliver a message to the Chancellor of Germany.
The message in question was "Up Yours Adolf", written on the side of several 500lb bombs which they dropped from their RAF Lancaster bomber.
Apparently, Herr Hitler was not amused and shortly afterwards killed himself.
No fucking sense of humour the Germans.
.
(Thu 15th Apr 2004, 1:13, More)
» DIY disasters
Beer+Shed =
In my defence, I was very drunk and it was raining. Work was generally interrupted by sniggering about the word "erections".
When all said and done though - When it's raining, it's too wet to fix and when it's dry, it's as good as anyone else's shed...
(Fri 4th Apr 2008, 18:38, More)
Beer+Shed =
In my defence, I was very drunk and it was raining. Work was generally interrupted by sniggering about the word "erections".
When all said and done though - When it's raining, it's too wet to fix and when it's dry, it's as good as anyone else's shed...
(Fri 4th Apr 2008, 18:38, More)
» The Worst Journey in the World
Not exactly Ayia Napa...
We were living in Cyprus in July 1974 when the Turkish Army invaded. Fortunately, the jolly nice chaps at the RAF arranged for us to be evacuated, which sounds lovely until you realise some things;
1) It was technically a warzone and the evacuation was taking place in what is technically known as a military aircraft.
2) The seats on RAF transport planes face backwards towards the tail.
3) To prevent problems arising from point (1) the takeoff is near-vertical inducing some oh-so-hilarious misadventures thanks to point (2).
Cue an 8-hour flight on a vomit filled plane full of people mostly wearing swimwear most of them crying either through shock, fear or injury or because they had left behind everything they owned and in many cases their husbands/fathers.
Then arrive in Oxfordshire with nothing, not even the price of a cup of tea in English money and somehow try to get "home" whilst wearing beach clothes and a dark tan during what seemed like continual thunderstorms.
National Express? South-West Trains? Virgin CrossCountry? Don't make me laugh....
(Thu 7th Sep 2006, 15:32, More)
Not exactly Ayia Napa...
We were living in Cyprus in July 1974 when the Turkish Army invaded. Fortunately, the jolly nice chaps at the RAF arranged for us to be evacuated, which sounds lovely until you realise some things;
1) It was technically a warzone and the evacuation was taking place in what is technically known as a military aircraft.
2) The seats on RAF transport planes face backwards towards the tail.
3) To prevent problems arising from point (1) the takeoff is near-vertical inducing some oh-so-hilarious misadventures thanks to point (2).
Cue an 8-hour flight on a vomit filled plane full of people mostly wearing swimwear most of them crying either through shock, fear or injury or because they had left behind everything they owned and in many cases their husbands/fathers.
Then arrive in Oxfordshire with nothing, not even the price of a cup of tea in English money and somehow try to get "home" whilst wearing beach clothes and a dark tan during what seemed like continual thunderstorms.
National Express? South-West Trains? Virgin CrossCountry? Don't make me laugh....
(Thu 7th Sep 2006, 15:32, More)