» Stuff You've Overheard

In Amsterdam
Overheard two obviously excited teenagers talking:

Teen 1 - "What shall we do?"
Teen 2 - "Get stoned or shag a whore?"
Teen 3 - "Fuck it, let's do both"

Good work lads
(Thu 10th Jun 2004, 16:35, More)

» Stuff You've Overheard

There seems to be quite a few stories about American tourists...
...so here's one that happened to a friend of mine a few years ago.

Him and his family were in Edinburgh when they overheard two Americans talking.

Yank No. 1 "Ah gee it's such an amazing castle"
Yank No. 2 "Yeah I know, just a shame they built it so close to the railway"
(Thu 10th Jun 2004, 9:28, More)

» Shit Stories

Drunk Poo
When I was 15 I'd been out somewhere and was on my way home when I bumped in to my brother and all his football team who were on their end of season do and all very pissed up. Anyway a couple of them bundled me in to their car and took me up to the local shit-hole of a nightclub and proceeded to ply me with beer. Feeling a little worse for wear I mae my way to the toilet to throw up. Now this is where it gets a little hazy. Obviously whilst I was hugging the bowl I fell asleep with my head down the pan. This is where a now very irrate brother found me and walked me home. What we soon realised as we were walking home was that a) I was fucking hammered and b) I'd shit in my pants whilst throwing up. There was nothing I could do other than carry on walking. When we got in I was that pissed that I just took my trousers and pants off, left them in a shitty heap on my bedroom floor with a note to my Mum left on them saying "Sorry I got pissed and shit my pants".

Still gets talked about to this very day.
(Thu 6th May 2004, 14:40, More)

» Mini Cabs From Hell

Thought of another one...
After spilling out of a club me, my mate and 2 birds we knew got into a mini-cab to take us quite a long way. We hustled and got him down to £25 (a bargain) when we were on our way we were quizzing him about what his name was, why he drives a mini-cab, calling him an illegal immigrant etc... He was taking it all well, laughing and joking with us. When we were nearing our destination one of the girls with us (a copper) pulled out her warrant card & I.D. and the bloke shit an absolute brick and went completely quite. Needless to say he let us off the fare.
(Thu 27th May 2004, 16:06, More)

» Teenage Poetry

People used to sing this to me...
Andy Pandy pudding and pie, kissed the girls and made them cry, when the boys came out to play, he kissed them too 'cos he's a gay.

Cunts.
(Sun 14th Aug 2005, 20:05, More)