» Cross Dressing

Tranny Man, the greatest poofter of them all!
When I was younger, I dressed my little brother's Action Man in Barbie clothes.

My brother went mental, but I didn't hear Action Man complaining.
(Sun 18th Mar 2007, 21:04, More)

» Food sabotage

Pretend Sabotage
I became a vegetarian at the age of twelve, so my mum would keep Linda McCartney pies and other vegetarian foods in the freezer.

Anyway, one evening my mum decided to have a bit of fun with my chavvy little brother by telling him that we only had Linda McCartney pies left and that he would have to have one of those.

My little brother sat on the sofa eating his dinner with his baseball cap on, pulling a stupid face and saying, "Awwwww, this is ****in' disgustin'."

When he finished, my mother produced an empty box from the kitchen and revealed that she had not sabotaged his dinner after all. It was in fact a Bird's Eye chicken pie.
(Fri 19th Sep 2008, 22:54, More)

» People with Stupid Names

Bastards.
I once met a man called Malcolm Bastard.

Now once, there was a family of Bastards. Mr Bastard, Mrs Bastard... and all the little Bastards.
(Tue 31st Aug 2004, 13:23, More)

» World's Most Hated Food

Pot sick. Turnips in diguise. Soggy hot cucumber.
In our house a Pot Noodle was always called a Pot Sick for obvious reasons. In fact, until I learned to read, that's what I thought they were actually called. Hence when I was little, I went round the village shop looking for one and didn't find it.

I once bit into a piece of turnip thinking it was just a boiled potato as it looked the same as the boiled potatoes next to it. Gross.

And why is it that whenever you go to McDonalds, whether you have a big mac, a cheeseburger, or an apple pie, they ALWAYS give you a gherkin???
(Mon 12th Jul 2004, 14:33, More)