b3ta.com user mcintoish
You are not logged in. Login or Signup
Profile for mcintoish:
Profile Info:

none

Recent front page messages:


none

Best answers to questions:

» World's Sickest Joke

Things to do in toilets
1.Stick your palm open under the stall wall and ask your neighbour, ''May I borrow a highlighter?''
2. ''Uh-oh, I knew I shouldn't put my lips on that.''
3. Cheer and clap loudly every time somebody breaks the silence with a bodily function noise.
4. ''Hmmm, I've never seen that colour before.''
5. ''Damn, this water is cold.''
6. Grunt and strain real loud for 30 seconds and then drop a shoe into the toilet bowl from a high place and sigh relaxingly.
7. ''Now how did that get there?''
8. ''Hummus. Reminds me of hummus.''
9. Fill up a large flask with lemonade. Squirt it erratically under the stall walls of your neighbours while yelling,' Whoa! Easy boy!!''
10. '' Interesting....more sinkers than floaters''
11. Using a small squeeze tube, spread peanut butter on a wad of toilet paper and drop under the stall wall of your neighbour. Then say,' Whoops, could you kick that back over here, please?"
12. ''C'mon Mr. Happy! Don't fall asleep on me!!"
13. ''Boy, that sure looks like a maggot''
14. ''Damn, I knew that drain hole was a little too small. Now what am I gonna do?''
15. Play a well-known drum cadence over and over again on your butt cheeks.
16. Before you unroll toilet paper, lay down your ''Cross-Dressers Anonymous'' newsletter on the floor visible to the adjacent stall.
17. Lower a small mirror underneath the stall wall and adjust it so you can see your neighbour and say, ''Peek-a-boo!''
18. Drop a D-cup bra on the floor under the stall wall and sing ''Born Free.''
(Mon 12th Dec 2005, 16:48, More)

» World's Sickest Joke

hooray for the monkees
Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree?
A: It was dead.
Q: Why did the other monkey fall out of the tree?
A: It was dead, too.
Q: Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree?
A: It was tied to the other two.
Q: Why did the elephant fall over?
A: It got hit by falling monkeys.
(Mon 12th Dec 2005, 16:34, More)

» World's Sickest Joke

WOOT
Why did Billie Piper cross the road?

Coz she wanted to she wanted to

Ticket to hull plz
(Fri 9th Dec 2005, 17:21, More)

» World's Sickest Joke

woo yaa
A drunk walks up to an attractive woman in a bar and whispers in her ear, "I wan't to rip your shirt off and suck on your boobies".

The woman points across the bar and says, "See that big, hulking guy over there, he's my boyfriend and if you don't leave be alone, I'm gonna get him to beat the crap out of you".

The drunk slinks away but soon musters the courage to try again, saying to the woman, "I want to take off your pants and lick your a$$".

Again, the woman says, "I'm not kidding, leave me alone or I'll get my boyfriend to kick the living snot out of you".

The drunk however is not deterred and whispers to the woman, "I want to turn you upside down, fill your pu$$y full of whiskey, and drink you dry".

In a rage, the woman crosses the bar to speak to her boyfriend. "See that drunk over there, he said we would rip my shirt off and suck on my boobies!".

The boyfriend stands up and says, "I'll kill him".

The woman goes on, "He also said he would take off my pants and lick my a$$".

The boyfriend turns red with rage and starts to cross the bar, but the woman holds him back and finishes the tale, "He then said we would flip me upside down, fill my pu$$y with whiskey and drink me dry"!

Suddenly the boyfriend turns pale and sits down. The girlfriend says, "What's the matter, aren't you going to kick the snot out of him?"

The boyfriend replies, "Anyone who can drink that much whiskey is too tough for me!"
(Mon 12th Dec 2005, 16:39, More)

» World's Sickest Joke

PIGS
What's the difference between a police car and a porcupine?

Porcupines have pricks on the outside
(Mon 12th Dec 2005, 16:33, More)
[read all their answers]