b3ta.com user new_dawn
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» Stupid Colleagues

Tenuous?
My partner once phoned me from work. He said he couldn't focus as he'd been to McDonalds for breakfast and kept thinking about Big Macs and how wasteful they were. I asked him to explain this baffling statement, and he went on to say that they use one and a half burger buns for each burger, so what do they do with all the leftover tops? I gently explained that they're specially made buns which are cut into three rather than the usual two, he went back to work happy and I hung up and fell off my chair laughing.
(Sat 5th Mar 2011, 11:40, More)

» Worst Band Ever

James Blunt
There's a lot of substandard music out there, but the Blunt is the only artist who has me swearing like a banshee and diving across the office to flaunt the "Radio 2 only" policy.

Can anyone explain his popularity? It genuinely baffles me.
(Sat 1st Jan 2011, 12:20, More)

» Things to do before you die

The simple life
I recently attended some person-centred-planning training through my work. It's basically a series of guided exercises to use with people with learning disabilities or intellectual impairments to explore what's important to them and what they'd like to achieve. Sounds simple but it can be very powerful, so we all had to do the exercises ourselves.

It turns out my wishes are pretty simple. I want a rambling old cottage in the country with some land for a smallholding and animal sanctuary. I love the idea of being self-sufficient, and of being certain that any meat I eat had a good life and pain-free death.

Before I settle down in the country though, I want to travel the world, bottle feed a tiger cub and see my partner and the band he's in be successful.
(Sat 16th Oct 2010, 11:33, More)

» Killed to DEATH

Mercy killing

The only thing I've ever deliberately killed was a rabbit while I was on a Duke of Edinburgh expedition. It must have been caught by a bird of prey and dropped - the bird had bitten clean through its spine just behind its head. The poor thing was lying on its side shrieking in terror and twitching , so I did the decent thing and bashed its head in with a rock. The poor thing actually looked relieved as it died.
(Sat 24th Dec 2011, 10:24, More)

» Irrational Hatred

Jeff Goldblum

I have no idea why I hate him so. The mere sight of him drives me into an incoherent red rage, but I can't for the life of me figure out why.
(Sun 3rd Apr 2011, 19:13, More)
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