» Teenage Poetry

I did a valentine's card
with the caption

"Roses are red,
Violets are blue,
If you give me head,
I'll say that I love you"

It was worth a try I suppose...
(Fri 12th Aug 2005, 11:12, More)

» Crappy Prizes

Rocks
I won a raffle at last year's christmas party.

The prize? A Rock garden in a box.

At least I had something solid to beat the announcer to death with.
(Fri 5th Aug 2005, 13:04, More)

» What's the most horrific thing you've seen?

Horrific
Seeing somebody step in front of a tube at King's Cross was pretty bad. If you're going to commit suicide, do it at home where it's not going to hold up 10,000 people and traumatize the poor tube staff who have to pick up your entrails scattered over 100 yards of track...
(Mon 25th Jun 2007, 13:23, More)

» Scary Neighbours

My old neighbours
Were crazy (Bless em) She used to swear there were a family of little people living under the car in her driveway, and they were stealing her sugar.

To be fair, the dwarves did always seem to have more than enough sugar...
(Thu 1st Sep 2005, 12:10, More)

» Weird Traditions

When I...
open a packet of ciggies I take out the first one and replace it in the pack upside down, and don't smoke it till last.

That way the "lucky" one doesn't give you cancer...
(Fri 29th Jul 2005, 10:59, More)