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Profile for Dooley:
Profile Info:

I retired from b3ta when Zoo Magazine, spawn of the evil eMap interactive, profited from my creativity like so many other notable b3tans before me.

Recent front page messages:

It's-a me...! Let's-a go!



Don't worry. I didn't take any scissors to it, but it's
still compo-able, right?

(Wed 4th Jul 2007, 18:54, More)

Hull-bound, you say?

(Mon 29th May 2006, 13:15, More)

22K! 22K! 22K!

Special thanks to FoldsFive, for being a good sport!
(Now with added "Yeehaw!" AND hat-jumpage...)

(Tue 17th Jan 2006, 19:40, More)

Der-ner-ner-ner...

(Sun 1st Jan 2006, 21:45, More)

Ke ke ke?

(Sun 1st Jan 2006, 16:12, More)



(Fri 30th Dec 2005, 21:18, More)

Best answers to questions:

» Oldies vs Computers

My Pa -
I once tried to teach my Dad how to use a computer (running Windows XP) from scratch.
I mean it - he didn't know squat. He didn't know what a monitor was.
We eventually got logged on, and he was 'practicing' opening and closing various windows.
(Wow - makes you seem like you take the principal on windows an Start Bars for granted, eh?)
He tried to close an IE window, and as he hovered over the red X icon, the generic little yellow info box popped up offering "Close", as in 'get-rid-of'.
He tried to click the X, and being old and shaky, he missed.
He then asked if the little yellow box was telling that he was close.
lol.
(Sun 24th Sep 2006, 21:40, More)

» Never Meet Your Heroes

When I was about 7 years old,
I won a competition to meet Otis the Aardvrk (back then CBBC's puppet mascot).
Me and a few other kids who won went to the local shopping centre to recieve our "prize".
We got there, waited for about an hour, and he didn't show.
It's a fucking puppet.
How busy is his schedule?


(Fri 26th May 2006, 8:50, More)

» I met a weirdo on the interweb

Someone once added me on MSN.
They didn't appear online for days after adding me. Judging by their address, they appeared to be called Bertie Phelps. Eventually they came online, and after not replying for a while, they admitted to getting my address from my b3ta profile. I don't know what their b3ta username is, so "Bertie", if you're reading this, I blocked you because you're a twat.

P.S. Bertie - your MSN space is poo and Blink 182 are shit.
Gah. These things wind me up easily.
(Sun 19th Mar 2006, 15:09, More)

» Heckles

Poor, poor actors.
My dad went to see the story of Anne Frank on stage once.
When the Gestapo burst into her house, he stood up and shouted:

"SHE'S IN THE ATTIC!"


He wasn't even thrown out or anything!
(Sun 9th Apr 2006, 17:53, More)

» Missing body parts

When I was very young and my Father still bathed me,
*mnngh* he used to make a hammock out of a giant beach towel and swing me around in it for japes.
One said bath-evening, I climbed out of the tub and sat in my towely-hammock to be swung around in the said manner. He picked up both ends of the towel and swayed me backwards only to lose grip of one end of the towel and send me flying face-first into the door-handle. I lost a front tooth and had a nasty ulcer develop in the gap until the adult tooth grew through it and split it. Eww.
On another note, a leper I once knew screwed a whore. He let her keep the tip.
(Fri 2nd Jun 2006, 10:33, More)
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