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Profile for stonersmurf:
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Occasional b3tard and professional pot smoker.

www.myspace.com/stonersmurfuk

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Best answers to questions:

» Top Tips

Dropped your pot on the carpet?
Just get a sock (or a pair of tights) and place it over the end of your vacuum cleaner to suck up any loose 'erb - once you're done, place a piece of paper underneath and turn the hoover off. White paper is better as that way you can remove the odd bit of fluff that may have found its way in....


:)
(Sat 2nd Dec 2006, 9:25, More)

» My first experience of porn

Where are the lady-bits?
If you are going to try and steal a jazz mag from a newsagents, make sure you look at the one that you've nabbed.....thought I got Club, but upon further inspection had actually managed to thieve some kind of porn story book...with no fucking pictures!

Imagine my annoyance (at 12 yrs old) reading "her moist quim waited for his quivering member".....ey? I wanted to see some ladybits!
(Tue 30th Jan 2007, 12:08, More)

» Top Tips

Cleaning out your bong....
Empty out all the nasty bong water and fill with a mixture of Fairy Power Spray, uncooked Rice and hot water. Leave it to settle for a couple of minutes - then plug up the ends of the bong with a bit of clingfilm to stop any water escaping, then shake the bong, the agitating motion of the rice, coupled with the Power Spray means a clean bong with practically no scrubbing! :)
(Sat 2nd Dec 2006, 9:44, More)

» Restaurants, Kitchens and Bars... Oh my!

Pish 'n' Chips
When working in a local chippy as a nipper I took great delight in adding my own urine into the battermix which was then out onto food, deepfried and then sold to customers. It certainly gave the food an "interesting" taste and more amusingly, we had a few customers that complained about the taste being weird when I hadn't pissed in it! Wankers.
(Wed 26th Jul 2006, 13:47, More)

» Fire!

Fire!
It's orange and yellow and looks good on hippies......:)
(Fri 4th Nov 2005, 8:27, More)
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