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» Have you ever paid for sex?

Not money, but a deal was made
I took this girl home one night (in the days that I didn't drink myself unconscious and wake up on the floor soaked in my own piss... but I'm going off topic now).

So I brought her home after clubbing and fucked her silly. Then she asked to swap sides (of the bed) because there was a wet patch. I said I'd swap if I could cum in her mouth. Which she did.

But I kept my side.

la la la
(Fri 20th Jan 2006, 23:52, More)

» Have you ever paid for sex?

Another deal.
So the ex popped round to avoid rush-hour.

"Make me a coffee," she said.
"Give me a blowjob," I wittily respond.

Good girl.
(Sun 22nd Jan 2006, 10:35, More)

» Join us... come join the cult

bloody drugs
I remember when I was a kid (well, 16 or so) and my circle of friends had just moved on from the usual dope and 'soft' trips, on to the horrible, horrible microdots. I'd taken a couple with a couple of friends, whilst another two friends took some the same night, only not with us.

So those two come round to mine the next day, everyone was feeling a bit shit, not really having enjoyed the dots at all (too much, too soon and all that). Of course, the weed came out and a couple of us started tripping again, as it wasn't quite out of our system yet.

This is pretty usual, but Tim thought I'd spiked him 'cos he ate my spaghetti (I wasn't in the mood). Went totally off it, properly paranoid and legged it.

He joined a Buddhist commune down in Durham shortly after, and nobody has heard from him since.

That was, like, 11 years ago...

Sorry, Tim :(
(Thu 26th Jan 2006, 22:24, More)

» Shame

I regularly...
...shave my nose hair with my brother's beard trimmer.

And sometimes my pubes, too.

I'm not ashamed, though.

And once, when I was 14, I dumped my then-girlfriend by passing her a note in English class. It read:

you're dumped

and she burst out crying. Right in the middle of the class.
I'm not ashamed of that, either.

Suppose I'm a bit of a cunt.
(Tue 29th Nov 2005, 14:23, More)

» Accidentally Erotic

tyne & wear metro system
Bloody public transport. Not the transport itself, more like the time of day...

My mornings usually go something like this:

8:20. Get on at the first stop. Train is empty.
8:22. 30% chance of the brunette posh bird getting on. 80% chance of the blonde schoolgirl getting on. I'd rag them both. At once.
8:30. Both those girls get off.
8:32. The dirtiest (in a good way) looking townie schoolie gets on. Rushes to sit next to me (I glare at most people so they tend not to).
8:34. Townie girl gets off. She's got most appealing ass I've ever seen. Group of 6th form girls get on. They're all lush, of course.
8:40. Try to subdue erection.
8:44. Give up.
8:45. Get off the metro (with the group of girls) and go to work.

This happens without fail every single weekday morning.

I wear very baggy jeans.
(Sat 4th Feb 2006, 12:29, More)
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