b3ta.com user Name changer
You are not logged in. Login or Signup
Profile for Name changer:
Profile Info:

I used to have a psychic girlfriend,
but she dumped me before we met.

21 years of age, no insignificant other.
I have lots of hobbies, none of them are too boring to list, i just dont like sharing.

pet hates?
i dont have any pets anymore, can they still hate you from beyond the grave?

currently living and working in the sweatiest place on earth (not Scotland) surrounded by sand and folks that look at me like they want to kill me. maybe because im white.

i dont have a blog, im not that interesting that i can write about myself and my hobbies day after day.



What Pulp Fiction Character Are You?

An Elvis man, you like you women dangerous and your steaks bloody. You often get wrapped up in landscapes and fail to realize the danger you put yourself into. Don't get cocky, and don't get caught. It might be good to lay off the drugs every once in a while. Just a suggestion.

Take the What Pulp Fiction Character Are You? quiz.




how jedi are you?
:: by lawrie malen

Recent front page messages:


none

Best answers to questions:

» Rock and Roll Stories

Not quite rock and roll
Got free tickets to go and see Eminem (at least i didnt pay!) at the astoria.
Actually ended up leaving because the warm up act, Xzibit, was so sh1t.
Anyhoo there i was standing in the middle of this whacking great venue when i hear something along the lines of "yo, were here wit da sounds of the illest hip hop, dawgs"...etc
Then i see that its none other than Tim Westwood. Hes taking requests before the warmup.
i cant help myself but go up to him and give him my request.
it was something like "id like to request that you stop acting black you son of a vicar. just f off Timothy!" he wasnt impressed and returned with "why you hatin me bro?"
long story short(ish) Timothy Westwood is a c0ck

More rock and roll than that though, my mums english teacher was Mark Knopfler.
and my old man, in his yoof, drank in the same bar as Noddy Holder. no, i said NODDY not Nobby!

and thats all i have to say about that
(Sat 1st Jul 2006, 14:26, More)

» Mugged

Dr Congo
Not me but my boss...1969 he returns to shitcargo, USA after a three year tour of duty in the jungle of Doctor Congo (i think that must have been before he got his doctorate).
Anyway, Hes waiting at the station for his train, being 5'9" fella looking somewhat bedraggled he gains the unwanted attention of three "brothers" - they decide that he should give them whatever money he has - he thinks differently.
Obviously not realising that a soldier in transit is well within his rights to carry his firearms they didnt see the bulge of his assault rifle in his bag, or, evidently his service revolver holstered at his side.
To quote the man
"i pulled out my sidearm, pointed it straight at the one in the middle and told 'em. dead calm. You Futher muckers (this guy swears like a trooper - funny that) picked the wrong guy to Fuk with, ive just spent three years Killin your brothers in the jungle - I wont think twice about blowin you three away right here right now...so, any you wanna dance?"
I shit you not, this guy IS Harry Callahan in disguise. Needless to say they left him to his journey, probably shit emselves too.

No apologies for length or girth or lack thereof- it makes a change not to feel obliged.
(Tue 20th Jun 2006, 10:19, More)

» I hurt my rude bits

Back in the days of BMX
i used to ride dirt - ha ha , very funny you dirty lot you.

but seriously, riding jumps that were pretty big if i do say so myself, and getting some considerable air me and the mates would always be hurting ourselves, its an occupational hazard.
(or a hobby-ational hazard since we never got paid for it!)
After numerous broken fingers, bashed kneecaps etc we were pretty hardened to the odd crash and burn.
Not so when it comes to the danglees. oh boy.
To cut it short said the rabbi I went to jump a double (take of, big gap, landing pad - for those who dont know) only i was a little short of speed my front wheel landed way too steep, to counter this i pushed all my body weight backwards - and herein lies the mistake.
It is much better to go over the handlebars than tho land your arse on the back tire and use your bollocks for brakes.
beleive me.
It fucking hurt! no permanent damage was done, thankfully but ill never forget those moments of agony and the days of pain afterwards.

In other news a guy at my school was into fencing (y'know with swords and shit) he lunges, so does his opponent, opponent connects he squeals like a girl.
The guy he was fighting had parried his goolies, twisting one of them around itself.
This resulted in him being half the man he used to be.
if you dont like the length you can bite me.
(Sat 15th Jul 2006, 14:51, More)

» The most cash I've ever carried

Today
just been paid for the week

10 THOUSAND in cold hard cash!!!!

only its dirhams not dollars or Punds :(

still, looks like a lot of cash and it makes my wallet nice and fat.

going to buy an apple later in the week, yay!
music production with REAL software!
(Sun 25th Jun 2006, 5:43, More)