Profile for High Lord Phanty:
Mad Trombonist
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Best answers to questions:
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Mad Trombonist
Recent front page messages:
Best answers to questions:
» Job Interviews
Oh let's have a monster round-up
One place I used to work had an idiot postman pat clone working there and someone managed to nick a copy of his CV. Best line was "I am a keen DIY enthusiast and have found many ways to reduce the value of my house".
Not long after getting this job, I had to do this lunchtime buffet thing where the next wave of graduates got to meet the Real People who actually worked there. I was more interested in the food and looking out of the window at the pleasant view over the channel when I became aware of one of the graddies asking me something. "Yeah, sure" I replied, having no idea what he'd said. The guy looked really shocked, but rather than admit I'd been ignoring him I just brassed it out. Never saw him again which was probably just as well for him.
Went for a contract at BAE and the interviewer introduced me to the team. I shook one bloke's hand and it made the loudest CRACK! I've ever heard. People on the other side of the office were looking over to see what it was to see the guy shaking his hand and going "Ow ow ow!" and me standing there looking like a twat. Got the job though.
(Wed 26th Jan 2005, 14:13, More)
Oh let's have a monster round-up
One place I used to work had an idiot postman pat clone working there and someone managed to nick a copy of his CV. Best line was "I am a keen DIY enthusiast and have found many ways to reduce the value of my house".
Not long after getting this job, I had to do this lunchtime buffet thing where the next wave of graduates got to meet the Real People who actually worked there. I was more interested in the food and looking out of the window at the pleasant view over the channel when I became aware of one of the graddies asking me something. "Yeah, sure" I replied, having no idea what he'd said. The guy looked really shocked, but rather than admit I'd been ignoring him I just brassed it out. Never saw him again which was probably just as well for him.
Went for a contract at BAE and the interviewer introduced me to the team. I shook one bloke's hand and it made the loudest CRACK! I've ever heard. People on the other side of the office were looking over to see what it was to see the guy shaking his hand and going "Ow ow ow!" and me standing there looking like a twat. Got the job though.
(Wed 26th Jan 2005, 14:13, More)
» Singing the wrong words
Freed from Desire by Gala
The missus and sprog were adamant this went
"My baby's got no money,
He's got his trampoline"
(Fri 28th Jan 2005, 14:52, More)
Freed from Desire by Gala
The missus and sprog were adamant this went
"My baby's got no money,
He's got his trampoline"
(Fri 28th Jan 2005, 14:52, More)
» Lies Your Parents Told You
Superman
When I was about 4, my dad used to go on about how he was a fighter pilot in the war and other bollocks like that which I would pass on to my mate along the road. When my mate's dad met my dad for the first time he said, "So you're Jim's dad. I thought you'd have a big 'S' on your chest"
(Wed 14th Jan 2004, 14:04, More)
Superman
When I was about 4, my dad used to go on about how he was a fighter pilot in the war and other bollocks like that which I would pass on to my mate along the road. When my mate's dad met my dad for the first time he said, "So you're Jim's dad. I thought you'd have a big 'S' on your chest"
(Wed 14th Jan 2004, 14:04, More)
» Job Interviews
Shortest gig ever: 15 seconds, Marconi, Hove
Bloke: So I see from your CV that you've used TeamWork before.
Me: Really?
Bloke: Well I think we'll leave it there.
Bastard lying agents.
Still I got the last laugh because they shut the place and moved everyone to Leicester. Ha Ha Ha!
(Fri 21st Jan 2005, 14:22, More)
Shortest gig ever: 15 seconds, Marconi, Hove
Bloke: So I see from your CV that you've used TeamWork before.
Me: Really?
Bloke: Well I think we'll leave it there.
Bastard lying agents.
Still I got the last laugh because they shut the place and moved everyone to Leicester. Ha Ha Ha!
(Fri 21st Jan 2005, 14:22, More)
» Job Interviews
some crappy contract at easams
bloke: so are you more an application or infrastructure type programmer?
me (thinks): well seeing as most people are on the application side of things he wouldn't ask unless they wanted infrastructure experience.
me: infrastructure side (which was true anyway)
him: well it's application people we want really. (like there's much difference in military hardware projects anyway)
Next!
(Thu 20th Jan 2005, 16:04, More)
some crappy contract at easams
bloke: so are you more an application or infrastructure type programmer?
me (thinks): well seeing as most people are on the application side of things he wouldn't ask unless they wanted infrastructure experience.
me: infrastructure side (which was true anyway)
him: well it's application people we want really. (like there's much difference in military hardware projects anyway)
Next!
(Thu 20th Jan 2005, 16:04, More)