b3ta.com user Marty McFly
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Profile for Marty McFly:
Profile Info:

I'm a 37 year old father of two who still supports rather boring software for a living. I like photography and that's where I first got into using PS and now hope to use it for far more evil purposes on the mighty b3ta boards.

If you like, check out my best mate's art at www.edgewarearts.com,.

Recent front page messages:

Climbers are nothing but trouble

(Sun 13th Sep 2009, 19:17, More)

Best answers to questions:

» Call Centres

My first job in a smallish technical helpdesk
I was on a call to a particularly surly gentleman with a particularly surly problem (the details escape me now,) as I frantically tried to Google my way to the relative freedom of the next call I got somewhat lost in reading up MSDN articles and consequently lost in thought.

As a result I had forgotten that I had not in fact put him on mute so he wouldn't hear me muttering in thought and he was still listening waiting for me to deliver a magical solution out of my Google shaped tech-anus, when a particularly attractive red head who had just joined walked past into the next office section.

Enchanted by her lithesome figure, resplendant beauty and how just by walking by me she had brought a real ray of sunshine to a typically drab day I broke out into the opening bars of Stevie Wonders "Isn't She Lovely."

I got about 2 lines in before a stern voice barked out "I'd prefer if you didn't sing to me."
(Thu 3rd Sep 2009, 18:11, More)

» My sex misconceptions

Pregnancy
My mate Dave told me that the way to get girls pregnant was to stick your fingers in her fanny until you felt the eggs roll down. Thankfully this was not a technique I attempted to employ until I was a fully qualified gynaecologist.
(Fri 26th Sep 2008, 8:04, More)

» What's the most horrific thing you've seen?

Probably in Romania
We had stopped just outside Bucharest to fill up the vans, the road the petrol station was on(it only sold Diesel nothing else) was marked on the map as a motorway but in fact was a 2 lane road in such bad repair that cars just drove on whatever side of the road that had the least pot holes at that point.

I was stood outside the van watching the traffic meander past at 20 miles an hour when an old, large beat up saloon with about 8 people inside it drove past and purposely swerved into a pot hole which I couldn't understand until I heard a yelp and realised that the driver had in fact aimed for and successfully hit a stray puppy that was crossing the road. The puppy survived but in a country where a dead dog furnishes the roads every half a mile or so I knew it wouldn't receive any care and would die sooner or later.

The car pulled into the station and a large, burlesque man of about 50 years and a huge bristling moustache emerged from the vehicle brandishing a cudgel thinly disguised as a walking stick.

I don't know what was more horrific: watching a puppy get mown down on purpose or the man's terrible moustache.
(Mon 25th Jun 2007, 14:38, More)